Be nimble, be quick, jump over the candle stick
by TheRedRidingHood
Summary: This is how Jack came to be a Mercer, starting with his arrival at the Mercer house one cold night.Its ongoing so RR. Chap 15, the final chapter, its all very sad...xxxxxxx
1. Chapter 1

This is the Story of how the Mercer family came to be complete. I've had to mess with the boys' ages a little bit to make it fit, and i've made some assumptions and guesses about the characters. It begins with Jack coming to be a Mercer and is more or less his story and how he ties the family together.

I dont own any of the Mercers boys only my own OC's, and im warning you now, there's bad language and talk of child molestation and abuse in this story so if you're sensitive, i would advise you to stay away.

Its going to get worse as the boys get older as Jack is going to go off the rails a bit so we're going to get into self harm and stuff like tat. Im telling you this now so you can be prepared, this is probably my most 'grown up' story i've ever written so be aware that its gonna get kind of dark.

Other wise, R+R because i reaaly do thrive on reviews, and enjoy.

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Bobby Mercer was thirteen, and he thought of himself as a man. His nightmares thought differently though. In the one he was trapped in, _his mother was drunk, as usual, and was flicking lit cigarettes at him as his father, whom his imagination had blown up to monstrous proportions, was swinging cinder block sized fists at Bobby. Booby was running away but he was suddenly much smaller than anything in the room and had to struggle to navigate around everything._

_He stumbled over something and look down, groaning in horror at the sight of little Tommy's broken body. Tommy's normally bright blue eyes where dull and empty and had rolled to the side, his gaze fixed on some unseen Thing that Bobby was scared to think of. Bobby knelt beside Tommy, stroking the boy's hair away from his face. He realised too late that his father had caught up with him and squeezed his eyes shit as one cinder block fist came crashing down to end his life. _

Bobby sat up in bed, screaming out loud 'MA!"

He wiped tears off his face hurriedly, kicking out his legs to throw off the heavy duvet his mother had covered him with to keep him warm while he slept.

He padded across his room, pulling his door open and squinting in the bright light from the hallway "Ma!" he called again, "Ma!"

A door across the hall from Bobby opened and a slender African American boy walked out of the room, rubbing at his eyes "Why all the yelling?" the other thirteen year old asked.

"Where's Ma?" Bobby snapped.

"Probably downstairs" the kid shot back, his voice thick with sleep.

"Ma!" Bobby yelled yet again, "Go back to bed Jerry" he told the other boy "MA!" he stamped one foot angrily, feeling close to tears for reasons he didn't want to think about.

"Shut the fuck up!" a deeper voice growled and Bobby looked the right of Jerry as another door opened and a taller, much more muscular kid emerged.

"Angel, leave him alone" Jerry sighed.

"I'm tryna sleep" Angel, who was a year younger to

Bobby ignored him and headed for the stairs. "Ma" he said, hearing, and hating the whine that was creeping into his voice.

"God damn wimp" he heard Angel mutter.

Bobby froze at the top of the stairs, his hand tightening on the banister. "Uh oh" he heard Jerry sing song.

"What!" Bobby asked, his voice lowering to a vicious hiss.

"Aw fuck Bobby it's too late at night for this shit" Angel rolled his eyes.

"Take it back" Bobby stated "or I will lay you out Angel, I'm serious"

"Fuck you Bobby" Angel spat, banging his door closed.

Bobby sighed and ran at the door, pounding on it with his fists. "Come on Angel you fucking sap!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, "Come out or I'll come get you!" he snapped "Come on Bitch" he kicked the door painfully with his bare foot.

Angel didn't respond, and normally, Bobby would stay at the door until he did, but his need for his adoptive mother for once, overrode his anger and with one last thump on the door he carried on down the stairs "Ma!"

He found Evelyn in the kitchen, leaning against the wall, the phone pressed to her ear. Her curly blonde hair was like a halo around her head and her face was clean, free of make up, ready for bed. She wore her night gown and thick, fluffy dressing gown.

She gave Bobby a look, telling him with her eyes that she would see to him soon, and pointed with one slipper clad foot to a stool beside the counter in the kitchen.

Bobby sighed and walked over to the counter, climbing on to the stool, wishing he had put some socks on.

"Yeah…well you'll have to bring him to me, I can't leave the boys alone and it's too late for me to find a sitter" Evelyn was saying into the phone.

Bobby frowned.

"Yeah…yep, I'll make up a bed for him right now, I have spare clothes from the other kids and I can take him shopping for his own tomorrow while the boys are at school…uh hu….will you bring me his file so I know what I'm dealing with- oh he doesn't…this is his first removal?" her voice went high with surprise and Bobby could tell, disapproval "...I didn't say anything, bring him over, I'm sure he'll fit right in" Evelyn said. "Alright, see you then"

She hung up the phone, taking a long, deep breath.

"Who was that?" Bobby asked her.

"That was Maria" Evelyn told him "The social worker"

"She taking one of us away!" Bobby jerked upright, feeling his muscles coil, his body prepare to fight.

"No, sweetie not at all" Evelyn hurried to Bobby's side, running a hand through his dark brown hair comfortingly "Quite the opposite actually, we're uh…you boys are getting a new little brother" she looked at him as he spoke, trying to judge his reaction.

Bobby frowned again "a little brother" he repeated.

"Yeah temporarily at least…he's uh, he's seven, he just got taken away from his house for the first time tonight, he's…he's had it rough" she looked down then and Bobby knew from before that it was because she was trying to hide her tears.

"Don't cry Ma," Bobby said quickly "How ever bad it was he's gonna be with us now, he's gonna be safe" he told her.

"Yeah" Evelyn said sadly.

"So are we getting him for keeps or will we send him back eventually?" Bobby asked her.

Evelyn rose up and headed for the cupboard, taking out the makings of hot chocolate and digging a sauce pan out of a cupboard. She put the saucepan on the hob, added the cocoa and poured some milk into it, setting it to heat up "Well" she had been moving around as she spoke, "well at the moment its an emergency placing, he just needs some where to stay while social services decides what to do with him. He might be here a few weeks or months, and he might stay or her might get taken and placed with a permanent family…or I might adopt him, I don't really know yet" she admitted.

She took four mugs out of another cupboard and a bag of marshmallows from the fridge "Come on you two" she raised her voice slightly and Bobby smiled as Jerry and Angel crept out from behind the doorway.

"Bobby woke us up yellin" Angel said defensively as he and Jerry took seats beside Bobby.

"I'm not done with you Angel" Bobby said quietly.

"Oh honey, you where yelling for me weren't you? Are you okay?" Evelyn asked, her voice growing concerned.  
Bobby cast a look at his adoptive brothers "Yeah I just…had kind of a bad dream but its okay now" he muttered.

Evelyn walked around the counter and pulled Bobby into a loving hug, which he returned in kind. "Was it about your dad?" she asked gently.

"Yeah" Bobby said quietly.

"Well just tell your self over and over, that he can never hurt you again, he's in prison and he's gonna be there for a loooong time. And your mom…well, the less said about her the better" Evelyn ruffled his hair and Bobby, grinning, pulled away.

"She's not my mom any more any how, you are" Bobby shrugged.

"That's right" Evelyn agreed.

"What's this new kid's name?" Jerry asked as Evelyn began pouring the hot chocolates into the mugs.

"Jack" Evelyn told him.

She served out the drinks, giving each boy a mug and a pile of marshmallows.

"And he's seven?" Angel asked.

"Yep" Evelyn took a seat opposite her sons.

"Seven? He's a baby, why we gotta get a baby?" Angel tutted and rolled his eyes.

"It's not so bad" Bobby told him "I mean Angels only twelve" he elbowed the younger boy, who sat beside him, but it was a gentle gesture.

"Yeah, twelve, not _seven_" Jerry responded "He probably aint even potty trained" he shook his head.

"Hey are we gonna have to baby sit him?" Angel asked.

"Oh yeah, Ma we don't have to lug no little baby around with us everywhere do we? I got a reputation to maintain" Bobby said seriously.

"You sure changed your tune" Evelyn raised an eye brow at Bobby who shrugged.

"A new kids one thing Ma but I'm an adult, there's stuff I need to do that I can't have being slowed down by a baby" he stated.

"Oh, what stuff?" Evelyn cocked her head to the side.

Bobby cocked his own head in an almost identical gesture "stuff" he smiled.

"You know it might be useful having a _little_ kid around…for some…stuff" Angel said, his voice slow, as if he was trying to convey a certain meaning to Bobby.

"Enough, you're not roping this boy into your damned schemes" Evelyn said firmly "He's been through a lot" she gave them all serious looks.

"We never said we where gonna do anything, we just said it would be useful having a kid around" Bobby widened his eyes innocently.

Evelyn gave them all knowing looks instead, and the brothers looked at one another, hiding smiles that Evelyn saw, behind their mugs.

"We have to make up a bed for this kid, who wants to help?" Evelyn asked.

"Do we have to?" Angel asked brightly.

"Yeah!" Evelyn said, smiling but meaning it.

"The boys groaned as they picked up their mugs and followed Evelyn upstairs.

She opened the door to the single remaining unoccupied bedroom on the second floor.

Evelyn had, some years before, converted some attic space into bedrooms as well, to enable her to take on more foster kids if need be. Jerry's and Angel's rooms had actually been one larger room, that Evelyn had paid to have split into two separate rooms, as was her own and empty room beside her own, which jack would be getting. Bobby's room was on the other side of the empty room, near to the front of the house. Evelyn flicked on the light and went over to the radiator, turning it on to warm the room up. The boys set their mugs down "Jeremiah, would you please go up to the attic and bring down the box with the...blue stripes, Bobby, go to the airing cupboard and pick out some fresh towels and Angel, you go with him and get me a duvet and some pillows?" Evelyn was opening a small cupboard in the room, running her fingers over the surfaces "I'll get the dusters" she muttered to herself.

The boys ran away to do their given tasks, racing one another to be done first.

Evelyn dusted and cleaned the room quickly, resolving to it properly as soon as she had the chance. She watched as each of the boys returned to her from their 'missions'. At twelve and thirteen, the boys where physically, smack in the middle of puberty. Bobby, having always been a little skinny, was getting taller every day. He was a little short for his age as he was, and Evelyn got the feeling he always would be, but that didn't mean she wasn't constantly adjusting his clothes to fit him now. He was working out too, with Angel, sometimes just playing hockey or basketball, some times actually going to the gym, lifting weights. Bobby sparred too, Evelyn didn't approve but he did it and was developing that boxer's physique, the stockier build than that of Angel, who was taller, all long arms and legs toned more like an athlete, a runner. Angel insisted on keeping his hair short, almost shaved to his head, telling Evelyn he would shave it completely when he was older, to save himself the hassle of dealing with it. Bobby's hair, different, obviously, to Angels was grown a little long for Evelyn's taste. He had recently begun experimenting with gels and waxes, seeming to be styling himself after 50's greasers, except that Bobby would only ever comb his hair the once, if that. In attitude, it seemed to be taking Bobby a little longer to mature with his body than Angel did. Both boys where terribly handsome, Evelyn believed, and she knew that girls in the neighbourhood tended to follow them around. Angel was more than happy to return the attentions of the girls but Bobby still saw girls as a pest who got in the way of his criminal activities. He teased and pestered his adoptive brother angel for Angel's undisguised love of 'the laydeeez' as Angel would call them.

Jeremiah was different from his two brothers. He worked out with them, played hockey with them, but he was not the same, in personality, as they where. Whereas they where all rough and tumble, petty criminals whom Evelyn was fighting to reform, Jeremiah was much quieter, a lot more reserved, and though he would kill her if she said it aloud, more sensitive. He was a thinker where Angel and Bobby where fighters. Where they would respond to a bad situation by erupting into a confrontation with who ever it was they had a problem, Jeremiah was more likely to go away, find a calm, rational way to deal with the situation, then come back and propose his idea to his rival. He was a watcher, and a planner. This was not to say that he couldn't fight. Jeremiah's life before he came to Evelyn had been as tough as Angel's and Bobby's. He could, and had, fought to defend himself from bullies, local kids with petty grudges, and on one memorable occasion, an enraged Angel. Jeremiah was another one who even though he was growing every day; he was still small, slight. He too was filling out but where Bobby had the shoulders to bulk up if he decided to, Jeremiah would always be that bit thinner, that bit more slender than his brothers.

Evelyn realised she was smiling as the boys, her boys, came together to make up the bed without needing to be told what to do. Bobby had the taller Angel hold the duvet cover up while he sent Jeremiah, the smallest, crawling into the cover with the actual duvet in his hands. They secured the corners and Jeremiah wriggled back out, leaving Bobby to button the bottom of the duvet cover while Angel and Jeremiah cased the pillows.

Evelyn stepped forward to actually make the bed while the boys opened the blue striped box. They chatted, laughing and joking as they unpacked clothes small enough for a seven year old and put them away in the drawers, under wear and socks in the top drawer, t shirts in the second one, jeans and other trousers in the third and PJ's in the bottom. The put shoes on the floor in the cupboard and Jeremiah ran into his own room and came back with a teddy bear laying it on the bed with a small flourish.

"Perfect" Evelyn smiled, "Thank you boys, that's wonderful" she reached down and pulled the three of them into a hug.

"Aaw Ma" Bobby pulled away from her again, but it wasn't in anger.

Headlights flashed on the window as a car pulled into the street and the noise of a car engine filled the night.

"Mugs" Evelyn said as the boys all bolted for the door at once.

They pulled up short and grabbed their now empty mugs, running down stairs as the door bell rang. Evelyn hurried into her own room and threw on jeans and a sweater, not wanting to greet the boy in her pyjamas.

"Go put them in the sink please" Evelyn told them as she handed her own mug to Angel who had waited for her on the stairs.

"Aw Ma!" Angel took the mug and charged for the kitchen "Hey don't run with that in you hand what if you fall! You boys stay in the kitchen till I call you" She told them.

She walked over to the door and pulled it open, not too fast, not too slow, and smiled out at Maria. The forty year old social worker was going grey early, the pressures of her job streaking her black hair with silver. She had pale skin and brown eyes and wore a thick coat against the cold night hair.

"Hi Eva" Maria said pleasantly.

"Hey" Eva said, her eyes dropping from Maria's smiling face to the tiny figure standing beside her.

"Hello Jack…I'm Evelyn" she said softly.

The boy was staring at the floor, his face set in carefully blank lines. He wasn't holding Maria's hand, instead his hands where curled into small, gloveless fists at his sides. His hair, sticking out from the woolly beanie hat was that shade of dark brown that would go lighter as he got older. His skin was pale, his eyes where bright greenie blue-grey and smudged dark as if he wore makeup, and oddly, worryingly blank. And devoid of emotion

"Jack, do you want to say hello to Evelyn?" Maria bent her head down to talk to the boy.

He ignored her completely, standing completely still and silent on the porch.

"Well, why don't you both come in" Evelyn stepped aside as Maria started to walk in.

She put one hand on Jack's shoulder to guide him in to the house and he flinched away from her as if she had burned him. It was a single movement that took him a few inches away from Maria's hand, but then he froze again. Had Evelyn not seen him move she would have thought Maria had because the boy didn't even move his eyes.

"Jack would you like to come in?" Evelyn crouched down so that she was well within Jack's field of vision.

He took a single step forward, and then another, as Evelyn moved out of his way.

He walked into the house under his own power, his eyes never rising from the floor.

"Hey, that wasn't so tough now was it?" Evelyn asked.

Jack didn't react.

"You want to take you jacket off?" Evelyn suggested.

Jack maintained his silence and Evelyn crouched in front of him again.

"Jack" she said clearly "I'm going to un zip your jacket now, that's all I'm going to do, you just let me know if you want me to stop" she told him.

She reached for his jacket, finding the tab for the zipper and pulling it down slowly.

She pulled the jacket out, away from his body to un hook the clasp. "There we go" She said quietly. She stood, leaning forward to push the jacket off his shoulders and Maria carefully took it and pulled it back. Evelyn reached for Jack's hand to pull the sleeves off and blinked in surprise when Jack let her take his hand.

"Oh, your hands are cold!" She said in surprise, "why don't we go in the kitchen and I'll make you a warm drink, huh?" she gave him a smile as she got his arms free of the jacket, revealing the tattered sweater and jeans he wore beneath. His feet where clad in battered sneakers and he stood with army rigidity, his back poker straight.

He gave a tiny shrug but his face had yet to change.

Evelyn gently pulled off his woolly hat, revealing his lank, unwashed hair.

"Alright, follow me then…my other sons are in the kitchen, uh, you can meet them if you like?" She asked.

Jack was still unresponsive so Evelyn started toward the kitchen, assuming Jack would follow.

The boy did, slowly, and eventually they made it to the kitchen.

The boys stood side by side, smiling politely as Jack came through the door.

Seeing them, Evelyn realised how small Jack was, and apparently so did he because his eyes flicked up to them momentarily, widened, and he took one large step back.

"Jack, its okay, these are my sons" Evelyn said firmly.

"Hi" Jeremiah smiled but he didn't step forward, "I'm Jeremiah but, you can just call me Jerry" he didn't move forward "You're Jack right? Well Jack, this is Angel" Angel gave the child a nod as his name was spoken "And this is Bobby" Bobby waved.

Jack's eyes where wide and afraid, his cupids bow lips set in a grim, angry line. He was taking deep, slow breaths that barely moved his chest, ideal for calming his panic without drawing too much attention to him.

"Hey Jackie boy, you play hockey?" Bobby asked.

"Bobby he's four he doesn't play hockey" Angel tutted and elbowed Bobby in the arm.

"I'm seven" Jack spoke up for the first time since he had entered the house, his voice soft, and young.

"What was that?" Evelyn asked casually, knowing not to make a big deal out of the fact that he had spoken, lest he retreat within his own shell again.

"I'm not four. I'm seven" Jack stated.

"Oh I'm sorry, seven. Still don't mean you play hockey" Angel corrected himself, shrugging.

"I never played before but I bet I could" Jack said, still not looking at any one.

"Well maybe we'll teach you" Bobby suggested "If you want?" he tilted his head slightly, trying to get Jack to look at him.

"Jack, are you okay if I leave you with Evelyn and the other boys?" Maria asked from the doorway of the kitchen.

He gave that same, tiny, nonplussed shrug and Maria gave Evelyn a 'can I talk to you alone' look.

"Boys will you get Jack a drink while I see Maria out?" Evelyn asked.

"Sure Ma" Angel nodded.

"Jeremiah c'mere a sec" Evelyn waved the slender boy over.

"Yeah?" he walked to her side.

"Listen" Evelyn whispered as Angel began routing through the cupboards for glasses "Listen don't crowd him at all, don't let your brothers either. He's never been in a foster situation before, and he's awful skittish, don't freak him out, yeah?" she smiled down at him.

"Yeah mom" Jeremiah nodded and Evelyn followed Maria out into the hall.

Bobby gave it a second then followed them, hugging the wall so that he could hide around the corner and listen without being seen.

"He seemed…terrified" he heard Evelyn say, "What's his story again, it wasn't that clear on the phone"

Maria sighed "He's never had a mother, she bailed when he was a month old, he's been alone with his father ever since" she started " 'Dad' is a level one scum fuck, beat Jack, starved him…molested him"

Bobby winced as Evelyn let out a stream of curses that where totally un like anything she had ever said.

"There are signs of…on going abuse, he's been freaking out since we took him out of the hospital, wouldn't let any body touch him, took a freakin huge bite out of one of the doctors. He has lots of uh…you're just gonna want to be careful undressing him, he's gonna have a lot of issues about that…he's pretty beat up. The call we got was from a neighbour, his father was having some kind of party in his house, initially it was a noise complaint. The cops got there to find over a hundred people crowded into a house built for three at the most. Most of em where men…Jacks father, it seems, has been…pimping his son out to one or two of his friends. One of these guys had Jack in an upstairs bedroom"

Bobby pressed his hand to his mouth, feeling anger well up in his stomach. He heard Evelyn let out a low, quiet, impossibly sad moan.

"He was catatonic on the way to the hospital, then, came to life as the doctors got near him. Uh, as near as we've been able to tell, no allergies, uh, he's been fully examined by doctors and the cops took what they needed so you can go ahead and let him take a bath, but I advise you to keep the boys away while you do it, otherwise…well he'll probably freak out then too. You're gonna want to let the boys know I think, or at least give them an idea about what they should say around him and to him, what games or whatever little hazing rituals they have that they should avoid" Maria continued.

"His father?" Evelyn asked, her tone harsh enough that Bobby was actually afraid of her momentarily.

"Arrested, possession, child molestation and abuse, and child prostitution" Maria told her.

"You think he'll go away?"

"The guy they caught…with Jack is apparently saying that Jacks father asked him for money, so that's a given" Maria told her "And I woke up a teacher from the school Jack is _technically _enrolled in, on the rare occasions that he does show up, he tends to act out, he's violent, he steals,-"

"Sounds like he'll fit right in" Evelyn scoffed, her voice almost pained.

"Yeah" Maria agreed.

"Any idea yet how long we're gonna have him?" Evelyn asked "Not that I'm trying to see how long before I can get rid of him, I just…need to know"

"So you don't get too attached?" Maria asked gently.

"Maria I _always_ get too attached. But yes, if we're only gonna have him for the week or something, I don't want to be promising him…trips or things like that if he's going to be getting taken away and left wondering why I lied to him" Evelyn sounded tired all of a sudden.

"Well you know as well as I do, emergency placements can be just over night, they can be for a week or so while we try to track down other relatives…but he doesn't seem to have any, that we can find any way…it might end up being a lot longer than a week" Maria told her.

"That's fine by me, thanks Maria" Evelyn had a smile in her voice, Bobby knew how it sounded.

"I'm sorry I've had to wake you and the boys up so late" Maria said.

"Don't ever be sorry for giving a kid a second chance" Evelyn said seriously.

"No" Maria agreed "Well I'd better go make a start on his file…looks like it's gonna be a long one…poor little bug" she sounded close to tears.

Bobby heard the rustle of clothes as Evelyn hugged Maria and took his cue to head back to the kitchen. He rejoined his brothers, trying hard not to stare at Jack, who sat now on a stool, an untouched glass of milk in front of him.

The door clicked closed and a second later, Evelyn joined them in the kitchen.

"Well, look at the time!" she exclaimed, looking at the clock.

It was well past midnight, well past the agreed bed time for the boys.

"Boys, time for bed" She looked around at her adoptive sons.

"Aw Ma cant we stay up and get to know the little runt" Angel asked, but he grinned kindly at Jack as he said it.

Jack fixed him with the thousand yard stare that was already becoming familiar.

"No, I want to get Jack cleaned up and put him to bed, he's had along night, you all have school tomorrow, get!" Evelyn told them.

Grumbling, but passively, the boys filed out, leaving Evelyn alone with Jack.

He dropped his gaze again as she turned to look at him. Evelyn took a seat directly opposite him. "Hi there" she said again.

He had curled his tiny hands into fists and seemed hunched over, ready to run. Or, Evelyn figured, he was expecting to be hit.

"Jack?" asked Evelyn "Hey, you know you have nothing to be afraid of here right?" she asked gently.

"Yes ma'am" he replied robotically.

Evelyn sighed. "Are you tired?" she asked.

He gave that tiny mechanical shrug.

"I'll bet a little tiny boy like you, you're exhausted am I right? So how about, uh, we put you to bed?" she suggested.

" 'k" Jack said almost silently.

"Al right…um…do you usually take a bath before you go to bed?" she asked.

He shrugged again.  
"Well, would you like to now?"

" 'k"

Evelyn gave him a tight, tiny smile. "Jack" she said, taking a deep breath "Maria told me that your father was…well he was very, very bad to you, and you've been through things that no child, no person should ever go through" she watched his eyes widen almost imperceptibly "But I want you to know that nothing like that will ever happen to you here, do you understand? No one here will ever harm you in that way" she took a chance and reached across the counter top, crooking her finger under his chin and raising his head.

He let her, flicking his eyes to her face, then away, back and forth, clearly terrified to make eye contact with her "Jack…I'll never let any thing happen to you while you're with us" she looked him dead in the eye.

He held her gaze for a few seconds longer than he previously had, then blinked. Evelyn took it as a response. "So, you want to go take a bath?" she gave him a smile "If you don't, or you don't feel comfortable, I'm not gonna make you. I just know that when ever I feel scared, and I'm in a new place, I feel like a bath helps me relax a little bit" Evelyn explained.

"Will the water be hot?" Jack asked in a whisper.

"As hot as you like" Evelyn smiled.

"Wont nobody be lookin in?" he asked and Evelyn bit her tongue to stop the cuss word from spilling out.

"No sweet heart, no body will be looking in at you. I can wait outside for you if you like?" she asked.

"I don't wanna fall under the water" Jack whispered "Will you stay with me?" he lowered his eyes so much they where almost closed and Evelyn realised he was actually embarrassed to ask the question.

"Of course I can" she told him "How about I help you wash your hair, huh? And we have bubbles!" she grinned wide.

"Bubbles?" there was the faintest trace of something resembling excitement in his voice and his eye brows rose ever so slightly at the prospect of a bubble bath "I never had bubbles" he told her.

"Never? Well here you can have bubbles every day. And Jack, you don't have to feel bad if you want to ask for something" Evelyn stood and moved around to his side of the counter "You ready?" she asked.

He nodded and climbed down from the high stool, letting her walk in front of him, show him the way.

As she walked up the stairs, Evelyn looked back at the tiny boy, and then thought about her own boys. They had seemed to welcome him, and he had been alright with them after a few minutes…maybe it would all work out. She thought then of how rough the boys could be, wrestling around, getting into fights. Jack seemed sort of quiet, very introverted. The Mercers had a reputation for being loud, troublesome brawlers. She wrinkled her nose. Was bringing Jack into this house like throwing a terrier in with Rottweilers?

Well, she thought to herself, we'll soon find out.


	2. Chapter 2

Part two already guys! I am overwhelmed with gratitude for all the reviews, honestly, i was sitting working on this and the alert on my email kept going and i've just never fetl so compelled to post agin so soon!Seriously, thank you so so so much, i so often find my self doubting my own talents, and the last few days ive been feeling down any way for a whole nother reason but you all have just turned that right around, thanks you again!

So here's part two, same disclaimers apply, language and content etc.

Please keep the Reviews coming, you dont know how much they mean to me, honestly! XXXXXXX

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Evelyn Mercer awoke to the sound of screaming. She cursed, throwing off her duvet and jumping out of bed, and running for the door. 

As Evelyn pulled on her robe and yanked the door open she realised the loudest voice she could hear was a slightly unfamiliar one. "Jack" she whispered raggedly.

She charged down the stairs, running for the den, the source of the screaming. What she saw froze her in her tracks.

Angel was standing in the centre of the room, with Bobby and Jerry standing either side of him. Jack was curled over Angels shoulder as Angel span around and around, holding Jacks legs to keep him from falling.

Jacks long scream crumbled into infectious giggles as Bobby and Jerry swatted his feet as they passed. He wriggled and fought against Angel but the grin on his face told the truth about his enjoyment.

As Angel got dizzy and staggered, Bobby caught the falling Jack easily, setting the boy on his feet and watching as Jack too staggered around dizzily.

Angel sat down hard and Jerry clutched at his stomach as he laughed.

Evelyn covered her mouth with her hand and felt tears in her eyes as she saw the boys finally bonding together. It had only been a month since Jack had been brought to stay with them, but it had been one of the hardest months of Evelyn's life. Jack was, in no uncertain terms, damaged goods. He had night terrors, he barely ate, he rarely spoke. It was only the last few days that he had begun to come out of his shell a little bit, interact with the other boys, actually relax.

And now, here he was, laughing and joking like one of the family.

"Hey Ma" Bobby grinned.

He had a black eye and a cut lip, the result of a tussle he had gotten into with another kid from the neighbourhood. The other kid was in hospital, nothing too serious, and Bobby was loving the attention he had been getting over the incident.

"Morning boys" she grinned at them all.

"Hi Evelyn" Jack said breathlessly, still giggling.

Evelyn realised with a start that it was the first time she had even seen him smile, let alone giggle.

"Well hi Jackie" she crouched down as he walked over to her "They spun ya huh?" she asked.

Jack nodded, still grinning and Evelyn took a mental picture of his smile, memorising it instantly.

"Ma, my ass!" Angel groaned "You gotta get carpets in here Ma" he told her, climbing to his feet, clutching his butt as he rose.

"Or you gotta get better balance" Jerry shoved his adoptive brother playfully.

"Who wants breakfast?" Evelyn rose, catching Jacks hand as she did so.

She felt him hesitate for a second, then his tiny fingers closed over hers and she felt another wave of emotion hit her.

"Me!" Bobby snapped, shoving Angel out of the way and running through the house to the kitchen.

Evelyn and the others followed him, Jack still holding Evelyn's hand and as they got into the kitchen Evelyn lifted him onto the stool instead of leaving him to climb. Again, he let her lift him, even thanking her. "Well, I think today is kind of a special day so…who wants waffles?" Evelyn grinned at the boys.

They cheered in approval, except for Jack who just frowned "I didn't never have waffles" he told her in that quiet voice of his.

"Oh, well you are in for a treat my friend" Bobby told him as he poured himself a glass of OJ.

"You gotta be quick though Ma, I'm meetin Sophi in a little while" Angel told her.

"The crazy one!" Bobby exclaimed, banging his glass down on the counter top.

"Shut up about her man" Angel warned.

Bobby took on a high pitched, girly voice "Ay Angel, I looove you, don't you looove me Angel? Oh Angel, keeeesss meeee, hooold meeee, lick my feeeet Angel, ay papi!" he imitated Sophi's accent, snickering as Angel threw a dish cloth at him.

"Sophi…Miranda's daughter?" Evelyn asked.

"Yeah" Angel said suspiciously.

"Sweetie she _is_ crazy" Evelyn stated, to the delight of Bobby who sprayed the OJ he had been sipping all over Angel who roared and ran at Bobby.

Bobby, still laughing, set down his glass and set his feet, expecting Angel to tackle him but Angel swung instead, his fist connecting neatly with Bobby's jaw. Bobby reared back and _then _Angel tackled him trying to lift him up. Bobby punched at Angel's back, trying to bring up a knee but Angel had caught him low enough that he held Bobby's legs secure.

"Hey!" Evelyn waded into the tussle, grabbing each boy by the collar and pulling them backwards away from each other.

Bobby was giggling breathlessly and it didn't take much effort for Evelyn to hold him back, but Angel was seriously angry and Evelyn had to give him a little push backwards, stepping directly in front of Bobby as Angel went to charge again.

"Enough!" She snapped "The two of you, Bobby calm down and shut up about Sophi and Angel learn when to take a joke" she told them.

Bobby wiped OJ from around his mouth as Angel sighed, wiping his face.

"Ma" Jerry said quietly and something in his voice made Evelyn wheel around instantly.

Jack had that look in his eyes, the distant look that Evelyn already recognized. He had hunched his shoulders in that 'waiting to be hit' way that seemed to be his natural posture sometimes.

"Jack" she said, her voice soothing "It's okay honey, they're just playing, right boys?" she put a certain edge in her voice, so the boys knew to agree with her.

"Yeah Jackie boy we're just messin around" Bobby told him.

"Yeah little man, its all good" Angel shot Bobby a look.

Jack took a few deep breaths, then nodded slowly. He blinked, seeming to calm himself, but his eyes still held that distant stare, even as he looked around the room, and he didn't lower his hunched shoulders.

"Waffles?" Evelyn looked around at the boys.

"Yes'm" Angel and Bobby said in unison.

"I'll start making em, you boys all go get dressed alright?" Evelyn told them.

Groaning, the boys, including Jack trooped out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

"I get first dibs in the bath room!" Angel yelled, making to run up the stairs.

Jerry grabbed his legs, tripping Angel and Bobby grabbed Jacks hand and pulled the boy past the struggling pair, laughing as Angel grabbed at Jacks ankle and Jack kicked him away.

"HA!" Bobby cheered from the top of the stairs "We're the champions, you're the ass holes!"

"Language" Evelyn yelled from the kitchen in the tone of voice of some one who had said it before and would say it again.

"Jackie go in there and wash ya face" Bobby gave Jack a little push.

Jack ran into the bathroom and Bobby followed, pulling the little wooden step out from under the stick and lifting Jack on to it so the kid could see himself in the mirror.

"Do behind ya ears too" Bobby called distractedly as he returned to the stairs and worked to keep Angel from getting up.

Jack sighed but did as he was told. He put the wash cloth and soap back in the sink and hopped down from the step, walking out and toward his bedroom, tugging off his pyjama top as he went.

Bobby winced at the sight of the bruised on Jacks chest, back, and arms, that where still visible despite being a week old. He had scars too, some from cigarette burns, Bobby knew, as he had similar scars of his own, some that looked like the burns but bigger, a lot that looked like slices from a knife, and the one Bobby really hated, a scar from a bite on Jack's shoulder. It was a big enough scar that it was clearly an adult who had done it, and Bobby didn't want to think about what the story behind it might be. He had already resolved to do serious bodily harm to Jack's father, should he ever come onto contact with the…he wouldn't call him a man, no man would do that to his own kid…with The Shit, Bobby decided.

"Jerry, get off!" Angel yelled, bringing Bobby's attention back to the matter at hand.

"Hold him Jerry!" he told his brother, running for the bathroom.

Bobby stripped and threw himself in the shower, washing all over and shampooing and rinsing his hair as quickly as he could.

He leapt out, wrapped himself in a towel and ran back out of the bathroom, charging to his own room.

Jack, now dressed in a short sleeve t-shirt over a long sleeved t-shirt, jeans and sneakers, was crouching at the top of the stairs, watching Angel and Jerry who still fought one another.

Bobby got dried and dressed in an outfit almost identical to Jack's, substituting a hockey jersey for a short sleeved t, in under two minutes then ran back and dove on Angel, holding him down. "Go Jerry!" he snapped.

Jerry mimicked Bobby, running for the bathroom, showering as quickly as he was able, drying and dressing himself in record time, while the entire time, Bobby sat on Angel's back, holding his struggling brother down.

Jerry emerged from his room wearing jeans and a sweater with sneakers. He grabbed Jacks hand and guided the boy down the stairs, past Angel.

When he and Jack where at the bottom Jerry yelled to Bobby who braced himself, then let Angel go, running down the stairs.

Angel thumped his hands down on the steps and stood, stomping his way up the stairs and into the bath room.

Snickering, the other three headed back to the kitchen where Evelyn was laying out the first waffles.

"Where's Angel?" she asked.

Bobby shrugged, grinning wickedly. "Oh Bobby! I told you already about trapping him on the stairs like that!" Evelyn scolded.

"He shouldn't take so long in the bath room then we wouldn't have to cheat to get in there!" Jerry piped up.

Jack, who seemed to have relaxed again, watched the exchange with a grin.

"Well just cos he cares about how he looks that's no reason to gang up on him" Evelyn stated as she set syrup and cream down on the table.

Bobby grabbed the syrup and thoroughly soaked his waffles, leaning over to pour some on Jack's "It's the only way to enjoy em" he told the boy.

"Thanks" Jack smiled at him.

Jerry took a spoon full of strawberry jam and plopped it onto Jacks waffle "_that_ is the only way to enjoy waffles" he stated as he put jam on his own plate.

"What does Angel have?" Jack asked.

Evelyn grinned and pulled a jar of peanut butter and a separate jar of chocolate spread from the cupboard. Bobby and Jerry each reached for the jars, scooping ample amounts of both onto Jack's, then their own waffles.

"Wow" Jack raised his eyebrows at the meal before him.

He picked up his knife and fork and cut him self a slice, getting some of each confection on the piece.

Bobby, Jerry and Evelyn watched as he put the piece in his mouth and began to chew. His face went from thoughtful, to surprised, to delighted and he cut another piece, barely swallowing the first before he ate the second.

Evelyn laughed out loud as Bobby and Jerry shared knowing looks and went to work on their own waffles.  
They where all on their third helping by the time Angel came down. He piled three waffles on his plate and smothered them all with peanut butter and chocolate spread, shovelling chunks into his mouth as fast as he could.

"Hey!" Evelyn warned him "Close your mouth, try chewing, it's not as overrated as you think" she told him.

Angel began to chew with his mouth closed "Sorry Ma, but I'm gonna be late thanks to these three" he told her.

"Oh Sophi will wait for you" Evelyn scoffed "Hey, what are you two doing today?" she looked at Jerry and Bobby "Saturday, I bet you got plans?"

Bobby shrugged elusively "We're gonna go the park, meet up with some people" he

told her.

"Yeah…you want to take Jack? He hasn't met anybody from the neighbourhood yet" Evelyn reminded them.

It was true. Jack had been so unsettled in the time since he'd arrived that Evelyn had kept him house bound, wanting to let him relax in the house before she exposed him to the neighbourhood kids.

Bobby gave her a look indicating he didn't like it, so she shot a 'it wasn't a question' look right back at him.

"Alright" Bobby said, just managing to keep the anger from his voice.

"Great. Go brush your teeth all of you, then put your coats on, weather says its gonna snow today" Evelyn stated.

The boys finished their food and did what she had told them and within ten minutes Bobby was absent mindedly zipping up Jacks coat and pulling a new woolly beanie over the younger boys head.

Evelyn watched as Bobby, wearing a battered, over sized leather jacket, stood and regarded the boy, asking Jack if Jack had tissues, his gloves, if his laces where tied, if he had the couple of dollars Evelyn had given him in his pockets.

Jerry walked by and pulled Jacks hat off, combed Jacks hair then replaced the hat, dropping the brush on the table beside the door.

Angel strode by, checking his appearance briefly in the mirror on the wall, before he stooped and wiped a smudge of tooth paste from Jacks face.

Evelyn grinned as the boys looked back at her and waved at her. "Don't be late" she smiled back as they ran out of the door, banging the door closed behind them.

Almost as soon as the door closed behind him Bobby Mercer became a different person. His shoulders hunched almost imperceptibly, his face set in hard, grim lines and his hands curled into fists.

"We gotta talk to Fat Eddie" he snapped.

Angel looked over at him and sighed "Aw man not _now_!" he rolled his eyes "Can't it wait till I see Sophi?" he asked.

"No it cant he owes me money" Bobby snarled.

Jack flinched away from him but Jerry caught the smaller boys shoulder "It's okay little man" he said soothingly.

Bobby rolled his shoulders, cracking his neck and stomped off in the direction of the park.

Angel made a groaning, sighing sound and jogged after his brother.

Jack looked up at Jerry who made a face at him, grabbed his hand and ran after the others.

After fifteen minutes, Jack was gasping and struggling to keep up with the taller boys.

Angel dropped back and crouched, letting Jack scramble up on to his back. With Jack clinging, monkey like to him, Angel ran through the gates into the park.

Bobby had been walking but now he broke into a run as a portly boy sitting on one of the picnic tables spotted him and took off running.

"Damn" Angel sighed.

He crouched again and let Jack slide off his back "Wait here Jackie boy, alright?" he told him.

Jack nodded and Angel and Jerry charged after Bobby. Crowds of kids whooped and cheered as Bobby ran the boy down, tackling him low on the legs.

"Get off me Bobby!" the kid whined.

Bobby rolled the kid over and straddled him, punching him twice in the face just to start with.

Angel and Jerry reached him and stood behind Bobby.

"You owe me forty bucks fatso" Bobby growled.

"I don't have it yet" the kid moaned "I'm getting it by the end of today though I swear!"

"I cut my hands all up getting those fucking watches for you Eddie, and told you, pay me back by Friday, that was yesterday but you skipped out of school so, I want it now" Bobby punctuated his speech with punches to Eddie's side and slaps to the face.

"Pay up Eddie, he's pissy this morning" Jerry stated simply.

"Yeah man, and we all got other shit we'd rather be doing" Angel threw pointed glares at the back of Bobby's head.

"I…aaw maaaaan" Eddie groaned "Get off me and I'll get it" he snapped.

Bobby raised an eye brow at him. He reached out and grabbed a handful of Eddie's hair, pulling him to his feet.

"Bobby!" the kid squealed.

"You think I'm stupid? I let you up your fat ass is gonna run to your mother like the little bitch you are, give me the damn money!" Bobby yelled.

Eddie dug into a pocket and pulled out a screwed up wad of bills. "Jerry can you count it for me?" Bobby asked, switching back to pleasant so fast it was dizzying.

"Sure man" Jerry sighed, taking the money.

He counted it out "Forty even, in nasty ass damp bills Eddie, what'd you do, piss in yo pants?" Jerry sneered and handed the money to Bobby.

Bobby took the notes and sniffed them suspiciously. He raised an eyebrow and pocketed them as Eddie writhed against Bobby's grip on his hair.

"Thanks Eddie" Bobby smiled sweetly and punched Eddie in the stomach.

As Eddie hunched over, clutching at his stomach, Bobby looked over to where they had left Jack. Where there should have been a seven year old boy, there was simply empty air.

"Jack" Bobby breathed.

He went from standing to sprinting with out apparently needing to build up to it, and Jerry and Angel mirrored him. They reached the spot where they had left him and looked around to see a crowd of kids standing under an old tree. "Where'd he go!" Angel yelled over to them.

"Rufus took him outta the park" some one yelled back.

"Oh my god" Jerry gasped and took off running for the gates of the park, his brothers following him.

They reached the gates and burst out onto the street, searching around wildly.

Angel spotted Rufus and Jack across the street. Rufus, a forty year old man with watery eyes, was pulling a struggling Jack along by the hand. "There!" Angel pointed, running across the street, ignoring the cars that honked him as he cut in front of them.

One car swerved across the road but Bobby and Jerry would not be deterred and simply scrambled _over_ the car.

Rufus had given up trying to pull Jack and had picked him up instead and Jack didn't like it. He began to scream, fighting and struggling against Rufus' grip as the man tried to carry him.

"Hey!" Bobby yelled, picking up speed and charging at the man.

Rufus turned and had time to widen his eyes in surprise as Bobby, Angel and Jerry barrelled into him as one, knocking him down. As soon as he hit the ground Jack darted away, running back they way the boys had originally come.

Bobby was on top of Rufus, punching the man over and over again in the face. "Fucking pervert! Don't you ever even look at him again!" Bobby screamed in the mans face.

"I didn't do anything!" Rufus wailed.

"Bobby we gotta go get Jack" Angel tugged at Bobby's jacket.

Bobby leaned in close to Rufus' face "You ever even look at him again, and I swear to Jesus Christ Almighty himself, I will fucking kill you" he hissed.

Rufus regarded him with something akin to horror and Bobby spat in his face, kicked him, then took off after Angel and Jerry who had gone after Jack.

At a full sprint it took only a few minutes to get back to the house and the boys got there just after Jack.

They ran inside after him and heard crashes coming from the kitchen.

Jack was screaming wordlessly, his face twisted in anger, almost feral. He had tipped the pile of newly washed plates onto the floor and was climbing up onto the side board to open one of the cupboards. He began pulling out glasses and hurling them across the room.

"Where's mom!" Jerry asked.

"Saturday, she'll be next door playing poker with Miss Abel, Angel go get her" Bobby snapped, ducking as a glass smashed against the wall near his head.

Angel turned and ran and Bobby took a step forward into the kitchen. "Jack!" He yelled "Jackie come on man relax, we got him!" he told the boy.

Jack jumped down from the counter, slipping on something and falling forward into the broken shards from the plates. He climbed to his feet, his hands running with blood and kicked angrily at the shards, still screaming. Bobby took another step for ward and Jack ran again, slipping easily past Bobby and Jerry and into the hall way. He pulled an old walking stick from the umbrella strand and began swinging it, hitting what ever he could. Bobby ran at him but Jack swung the stick with enough strength that when it clipped Bobby's shoulder he fell down.

Jerry tried the same, darting back as Jack swung again. Jack ditched the stick and pulled the curtains on the windows either side of the door down, then ran for the back door, pulling pictures off the walls as he went.

The front door swung open and Evelyn ran in "Where is he?" she snapped

Jerry pointed at the back door, then, with his brothers, followed Evelynas she ran after Jack.

Jack was throwing the plant pots Evelyn had lined up outside the back door at the ground so that they smashed when Evelyn, still running, scooped him up in a restraining bear hug.

He screamed even louder and began to buck and fight against her, panicking in her arms. He was taking deep, hyperventilating breaths as Evelyn tried to carry him into the house. She got him back to the hall before she stepped just too close to a wall and he was able to kick off hard enough that she slipped, falling onto her rear end. Jack tried to crawl away but she caught him by the wrist, dragging him back across the floor, twisting him so that she held him from behind, his back pressed to her chest, her arms folded over his to hold them still. He kicked with his legs but Evelyn ignored them and began rocking him back and forth, gently shushing him.

"No!" he screamed "Lemme go lemme go!" he growled.

"It's alright, it's okay, just take deep breaths, just calm down" Evelyn held him so her mouth was near his ear and repeated her words over and over.

"I'll kill you, I'll kill him, let me go you _bitch!_" he yelled "I don't want you, get away!"

"Hush now, deep breaths" Evelyn soothed "I'm not going anywhere, deep breaths" she rocked him slower.

He stilled for a second then kicked out again, redoubling his efforts to break free.

Evelyn simply tightened her grip, folding her hands around his, forcing him to open his fists. "You hurt yourself, when you calm down we'll clean those up" she kept her voice very low and soft.

"I hate you! I hate you, you cant touch me, let me go!" he screamed piteously, tears streaming down his face "Please let me go…let me get away, I don't want to go back" he wailed, still fighting.

It took ten minutes before he was finally still. Evelyn tilted her head slightly and cursed internally as she saw that the blank, thousand yard stare had slid back into his eyes, that he had retreated back within himself.

"Oh Jackie no" she whispered "Jack don't go away again" she lifted his legs so that she cradled him in her arms, trying to make him look at her but he turned his head away, deliberately avoiding eye contact.

That spark she had been so delighted by only an hour before was gone. "No, Jack, please don't do this" she begged.

Angel, Bobby and Jerry where watching her from the den. "Angel get me the first aid kit please" Evelyn said, her voice thick with emotion.

Angel rushed up the stairs wordlessly.

"Bobby what exactly happened?" She asked, standing awkwardly and carrying Jack into the dining room.

"We where in the park and we had to talk to Eddie so we left him alone-" Bobby started.

"What!" Evelyn snapped.

"It was just for a second, and we could see him and the other kids where right there!" Bobby shot back "Rufus got a hold of him" he added quietly.

Evelyn visibly paled "Did he do anything?" she asked quickly.

"As near as we can tell he only got him out of the park, if he…messed with Jack, we didn't see it" Bobby hung his head.

"Jack, did the man touch you?" Evelyn sat at the head table and put Jack in the seat beside hers, "Jack please, tell me, did he do anything to you?" she used her hand to turn his head but he still wouldn't look at her.

Angel carried the first aid box in and lay it down beside her. Evelyn spotted Bobby staring at the ground "Bobby…" she called out.

He looked in her direction but wouldn't meet her eye "Bobby I'm sorry I snapped at you…this isn't you fault, it isn't any of you fault, it was unfair of me to expect you three to be able to look after him so soon" she told them "Will you all, please, start sweeping up?" she asked "Don't touch any of the glass, just brush it into a pile and I'll get it later"

The boys trooped out and Evelyn turned back to Jack. She reached over and pulled his arms so that she could lay his hands, bloodied palms up, on the table.

"Jack, this is gonna sting" she told him as she took a pair of tweezers from the first aid box.

She checked and was relieved to see that the glass was only in his hands, and that none of the shards where too big, but they had gone deep. She pinched the largest shard she could see and drew it out, looking at Jacks face to see if it hurt. He didn't even blink.

Evelyn worked quickly but thoroughly, removing all of the glass and cleaning the blood away from his hands. She wrapped his hands in band aids after smearing them with antiseptic cream, then moved the first aid kit aside.

"Jack?" she asked.

He moved his head ever so slightly and she tried again "Jackie?"

He moved his eyes ever so slightly toward her and Evelyn held her hands out toward him, palms up. His eyes focused on her hands and widened just a touch.

"I know bad things happened to you before you came to me" she told him.

His eyes widened again "Hey look at me" she said, a little more firmly.

Slowly, in his own time, he raised his eyes to her face. He still looked utterly terrified but he was looking at her at least "But you're safe now" she told him, putting as much sincerity into his voice as she could muster.

He seemed to be close to tears but he dipped his head in something vaguely resembling a nod.

"Alright then" Evelyn gave him a smile even though she knew he wouldn't respond to it. "I'm gonna go in the kitchen for a few minutes, are you alright to stay here?" she asked him.

He gave that miniscule shrug in response and she took it as a yes. She picked up the first aid kit and walked into the kitchen to see that the boys had done a stellar job of cleaning up. They had swept all the glass, shovelled it into bins and had mopped the floor where Jack had bled.

As Evelyn walked in to the kitchen, she saw that one of them had collected all the pictures Jack had pulled down, cleared the glass away and left the frames sitting on the counter. She suspected they had tidied the hall way too.

They sat at the counter in silence. "He okay?" Jerry asked.

"I don't know" Evelyn answered honestly, moving to the sink and washing her hands "He's….terrified. What ever happened has sent him right back to square one" she shrugged.

She had told her boys, on Jacks third night, about what he had been through before he had come to their house. They understood what it could mean for Jack's emotional and mental state, if anything had happened to him.

"Ma Rufus only had him for a few minutes, maybe he just got scared" Bobby suggested.

Evelyn walked around the counter so she was behind her boys. She pulled them all into a hug "Hopefully its just that…but in the future I don't want him left alone, at all, okay?" She told them.

"Yes Ma'am" they answered in unison.

"Now…I guess you wont be going out again?" She asked.

"I need to go out real quick" Bobby admitted.

"Yeah I still gotta meet Sophi" Angel said guiltily.

"Well then you each have an hour to go do, what ever, then I want you back here for lunch and then we're gonna have a family day for the rest of the day alright?" Evelyn told them.

They agreed, returning her hugs and filed out through the back door.

Evelyn went back to the dining room where Jack still sat.

"Hey" she called out "You want to come learn how to make cookies?" she asked.

He slid obediently out of his seat and walked toward her. "I'll let you eat the dough if you gimme a smile?" she told him as she helped him take off the coat he still wore.

He looked up at her, his wide eyes telling her that he was still a long way from a smile but he met and held her gaze, which was something.

"Alrightie, first things first we have to decide, what kind of cookies we're making" Evelyn told him "Because that's the single most important thing in cookie making. That and eating the dough of course"

"I'll be there in ten minutes man" Angel told Bobby, jogging away in the direction of Sophi's house.

Jerry caught up with Bobby as the slightly shorter boy headed back toward the park.

He didn't ask where they where going, or why, he knew that already.

They reached the park in total silence, heading for the crowd of kids who still huddled under the old tree.

"Hey Bobby you get ya brother back?" A lanky red headed kid yelled out, a smile plastered across his face.

Bobby only needed one comment. He reached the kid and swung his fist, knocking the much taller boy on his ass.

The other kids who's ages ranged from nine to fourteen whooped and cheered as Bobby rode the kid down, smacking him in the face.

Jerry sought out the kid who had first yelled that Rufus had taken Jack and grabbed the African American kid by the front of his jacket "What the hell man!" the kid snapped at him.

Jerry butted him in the chin "Why didn't you stop him Greg!" He roared as the kid fell to the ground "Why didn't any of y'all stop Rufus!" he glared at the surrounding group, who grew silent.

Bobby was still fighting the red head but no one cheered them any more. Normally a Mercer fight was a sight to behold but no one had ever seen Jerry this mad before. With Bobby it was his default mood but Jerry was, considering his back ground, one of the gentlest kids in the whole neighbourhood. Now he stood, still holding the other boy, Greg's collar, so that Greg was slumped awkwardly, holding his head in his hands.

"We didn't know who that kid was" a girl yelled out.

"He's seven years old, even if you don't know him you can see that! You just let Rufus, _Rufus_, walk away with a seven year old cos you didn't know the kid?" Jerry yelled at her.

"He's your tag along Jerry, why didn't you stay with him!" she shot back.

"Cos we figured y'all would have the sense to keep an eye on a kid _we_ brought with us" Angels voice sounded and the group of kids turned as he walked towards them.

Bobby punched the red head as the read head managed to straddle him, stunning the kid enough that Bobby could throw one last punch, then shove he kid aside and stand.

He was panting, blood from his own nose smeared across his face. "You all know what Rufus is, what he does" he growled "And you stood by while he took a baby kid away…yeah, we shoulda been watching him but that doesn't change that you let it happen" he told the group.

"Is he alright?" Some one asked.

"We don't know yet, he's at home, not talking" Angel told them.

"From now on, Jack, is a Mercer" Bobby said, and there was a finality to his voice.

"Y'all are gonna treat him as such, which means you aint gonna fuck with him, you aint gonna hassle him, and you sire as _shit_ aren't gonna stand around while perverts like Rufus try to take him away" Angel explained.

"Why the fuck we gonna listen to you any how?" the girl who had started on Jerry snapped.

Angel rounded on her "Cos if you don't you gonna get beat down" he said simply.

"Aint no Mercer boy ever gonna hit a girl, your mama would whoop yo asses" she snarked back.

"A Mercer boy wont but I sure as shit will" a new voice called.

"Puh leaze Sophi, you couldn't hit nothing" the girl sneered as Sophi, Angel's on and off girl friend walked over to her.

"I could whoop your ass Letitia, I have before and I will again" Sohpi stated confidently, her accent strong and latino.

Her hair was pulled into pig tails and she wore jeans with a pink t-shirt but she by no means looked harmless.

"Trust a crazy bitch like you to get in with the Mercers" Letitia rolled her eyes in disdain, so she didn't see the blow coming.

Sophi knocked her flat on her ass and stood over her, daring her to get up.

"Enough of this shit" Jerry snapped "Its like we said, you treat the kid, Jack, like he's a full on Mercer, or we kick the shit out of each, and every one of you" he said it in a perfectly reasonable tone of voice.

Bobby nodded slowly "Spread the word to any one who aint here, he's off limits…make sure Kyle and his band of fairies knows it too" he told them all.

Jerry let Greg drop at last and walked away from the crowd without looking back.

Bobby followed suit, and Angel pulling Sophi with him, followed him.

Bobby waited until they where at the gates "You can go know Sophi" he sniffed.

The twelve year old girl raised her eyebrow at him "You wish Bobby, I'm coming over for lunch and I _know_ you gonna thank me for savin your asses just now" she sassed.

"You didn't save shit" Bobby muttered, heading for home.

"Angel you gonna let him give me shit like that?" Sophi rounded on Angel.

Angel pulled his 'trapped between my brother and my girl' face, one he had already perfected even though he had only been 'dating' Sophi for a few weeks.

"Angel!" Sophi shrieked, slapping him on the arm.

"Ow! Relax!" Angel snapped at her.

"Oh you can forget about my mom takin us to the movies tomorrow" Sophi reared back, storming away from him.

Angel sighed wearily "Sophi, come back!" he chased her down the street as the snow finally began to fall.

Evelyn awoke to the sound of screams. She threw the duvet off, hurried out of bed and rushed to the bedroom next door.

Jack had thrown himself out of bed and was huddled in the tiny space between his desk and the wall.

He was shrieking, his eyes open but unseeing, throwing his hands out as if trying to fend off an attacker. Evelyn ran over to him, catching his hands immediately, checking that he hadn't bled through the bandages she had rewrapped his hands in after his bath earlier in the night. His hands seemed fine but he was still fighting so she pulled him forward and into her lap, much like she had done earlier in the day. He still struggled so she called his name as the other boys emerged from their own rooms and stood sleepily in the door way.

"Jackie I need you to wake up now" Evelyn said firmly and loudly, giving Jack a tiny shake.

His screams subsided and he blinked his eyes groggily, staring up at Evelyn. She had been worried when she put him to bed that night, as he still hadn't shaken off what had happened in the park, and she saw as he opened his eyes that that hadn't changed.

"Oh baby" she whispered soothingly "It's alright, I'm here" she cooed.

Jacks face crumpled and he began to cry quietly. After almost half an hour, he finally seemed to be settling.

"You want a nice glass of warm milk, help you get back to sleep?" Evelyn asked him, rocking him gently back and forth.

He nodded silently and Evelyn went to stand.

Her boys walked into the room and Bobby sat down beside her, holding his arms out. Evelyn looked at in surprise but smiled, passing Jack over to him.

Bobby held Jack the way Evelyn had earlier, Jacks back pressed to his chest, Bobby's arms wrapped around Jack in a hug. Bobby crossed his legs so that Jack was sitting in the seat Bobby's legs made. Jerry sat beside Bobby, Angel sitting across from him.

He seemed to take comfort in their presence so Evelyn stood and padded quietly out of the room.

As the she walked down the stairs, Bobby jiggled his leg a little bit, and Jack looked up at him.

"We're sorry we messed up today kid" Bobby told Jack.

"Yeah little man, real sorry" Angel agreed.

"We aint never gonna let that happen to you again though" Jerry promised.

"We decided Jackie…you've only been here a short time but…you're one of the family now, and we're gonna protect you" Angel told him.

"If any body ever hurts you, ever crosses you, we gonna come down on em, like the wrath of God little man, we'll make em pay" Jerry said firmly.

"You're our little brother now Jack, no matter what happens, you're our brother" Bobby told him.

Jack looked around at them, his eyes wider than ever. "Brother?" he repeated softly.

"Brother. And you don't have to be afraid no more either" Angel told him.

Jack blinked and nodded slowly. "Brothers" he said, "My brothers"

"Your brothers" Bobby agreed.

"Four brothers" Jerry grinned as he rhymed.

"Don't be startin in on that rapper bull shit" Angel sighed, but he was grinning.

"What bull shit, that was good!" Jerry exclaimed.

Bobby held Jack as Jerry and Angel began to bicker, feeling the kid relax against him.

He smiled to himself, rocking slightly from side to side the way Evelyn had, feeling the shaking that had been racking the boys body begin to fade.

By the time Evelyn came back with the milk, Jack was already asleep in Bobby's arms.


	3. Chapter 3

Hi guys, sorry its been a couple of days, i had to write a freakin essay about freakin globalisation, as if i care.

And then when i did get workin on this puppy i wrote like, seven pages going a whole other way with it, decided i hated every word and got all pretentious yelling about 'my craft' and getting all depressed and pretending i was chain smoking with my pen because i dont smoke really but wanted to be all stereotypical. But then i got a better idea and sorted it all out. Which was a fun few days over all.

Diclaimers, Language, Talk of Jacks past, I dont own any of the films characters only my own OC's, which reminds me, there are one or two im thinking of fleshing out a bit more so let me know who you do and dont like etc.

Oh, PS, some one mentioned in a review about...i said at one part of Ch2 it had been a month since Jack first came to stay then it said a week, that was my bad, i decided toward the end that i wanted it to have been a month so that Jack's emotional recovery and bonding with the Mercers had had more time to ,well, happen. But thanks for pointing it out!

Erm, ive already started on Ch 4 which will be really really emotional and all that and should hopefully be ready to post by monday so...

To my reviewers, i love you all. Seriously, there are times when i really doubt my own abilities because its always my family telling me im good and i think 'well ny family aren't going to tell me im crap' but you have really really made me feel like i might actually be ok at this whole writing thing. Seriously, thank you, so much, all of you. and please keep them coming because they really honestly drive me to work harder on these stories.

So here it is! xxxxxxxxx

* * *

Evelyn Mercer sipped at the mint tea she had made for her self and looked down at her note book. She had carefully written out a list of names, and made notes beside each one and now, pen in hand, she was working through them. In the last few weeks, Evelyn had gotten behind on her house keeping. Work, combined with errands and some things that had needed doing around the house that had taken longer than Evelyn had expected had made it difficult for her to keep up with the various problems, news and drama's, minor and major, that where going on in the lives of the kids who loved with her, her own adopted kids, and the ones she was currently fostering.

"Kerry, Lisa!" Evelyn didn't like to yell but all the kids where watching TV in the den, so Evelyn had to raise her voice to be heard.

The twin twelve year old girls walked into the dining room and took seats opposite Evelyn. She smiled at them. The girls where identical; blonde hair, brown eyes, the kind of lankiness of limb that foretold of supermodel height in their future.

Kerry though, had a small pink scar over one eyebrow, a gift from Lisa when they where three. It was the only way to tell them apart.

The twins' mother had a drinking problem. She wasn't abusive the way some drunks where, but she had, some weeks previously, drunk herself into a stupor and wrapped her car around a tree. The odd protective bubble that alcohol could induce sometimes had saved her from serious harm but it had not been the first such incident. As a result, the girls had been taken into care and their mother had been checked into rehab. It wasn't the first time that had happened either. Kerry and Lisa had picked up some of their mothers less savoury habits, drinking, smoking, but Evelyn .ad been working to free them of these vices.

"Hey girls, I'm sorry I've been so busy lately, how are you both?" Evelyn asked them, looking from girl to girl.

"We're good Evelyn, how are you?" Kerry asked sweetly.

"Oh I'm alright" Evelyn shrugged. "So, what I need to talk to you about is, we finally tracked down your Aunt Jeannie" she smiled as the girls beamed "She's on her way down from Alaska to come see you and when she gets here you and her and your mom when she gets a little more…clear headed, are gonna sit down and talk about where you guys are going to stay" she explained.

"What Alaska like?" Lisa asked excitedly.

"Well how about you two go and get the big encyclopaedia and read up, and find out? It's lovely up there you know, really beautiful" she told them.

"Do we have to go up there?" Kerry asked.

"Well that's why you're gonna get together and talk about it sweetie, if you two really don't want to go…maybe your social worker will figure out another option for you?" Evelyn nodded as she spoke.

"I guess" Kerry shrugged.

"Alright…do you two have any homework?" Evelyn asked.

"Some" Lisa told her.

"How bout you go get started on it, see if you can get halfway done before dinner?" Evelyn 'suggested'.

The twins nodded and left the room.

"Li?" Evelyn yelled.

A sour mouthed thirteen year old Asian American kid slouched into the room, slumping into his seat opposite Evelyn. Li had been in the system since he was three. He had been found abandoned, wandering the streets and had been bounced around orphanages and foster homes ever since. He was not a friendly boy, part of the reason for which was being Asian American, with no connection to his Asian culture.

"Hey, you have a good time on your field trip?" Evelyn asked.

Li shrugged.

"You get anything at the gift store?" Evelyn tried.

Li shook his head petulantly.

Evelyn widened her eyes in exasperation, and looked down at her list "Well, looks like you're going to be with us for a few more months, Maria's trying to find you an Asian family but until then, I found a lady down at the youth centre who runs some classes, teaching people to speak mandarin. Which is what you asked for. So you can start on Wednesday, an hour after school everyday. And I bought you some starter books so you can start studying up on them as soon as you like" She said brightly.

Li gave a minute nod and made to leave "Hey!" Evelyn caught him "What do you say?" she asked.

"Thank you Evelyn" he mumbled, moping away.

Evelyn sighed and ticked his name off her list, taking another sip of her tea. "Diane!" she yelled.

A stunningly beautiful fifteen year old young woman strode into the room, her pale Irish skin almost glowing in the dimly lit room. She had cut her hair recently, chopping off inches of her dark red hair into a short, punky cut that left her neck and shoulders bare, making the tattoo's and numerous piercing she wore all the more obvious. Diane was one of few kids who came to Evelyn who had actually had no apparent reason to leave. Her parents where a perfectly nice middle class family who had done their best to give her everything they could. Diane had been a perfect, sweet little girl until the day of her ninth birthday when she went, as Diane her self called it, 'Bat shit crazy' and begun acting out. After two years her parents gave up and turned her over to the state. It took a few months for Diane to admit to a councillor that she had been abused by a friend of her parents.

Diane's then social worker had told Diane's parents this but they had decided that she was still too much trouble and wouldn't take her back. Diane had been living with Evelyn for four months and in that time, she had changed her hair half a dozen times, gotten at least three tattoo's and gone through a short lived but spectacularly brightly coloured 'Disco Hippy' phase.

"Hey Evie" she grinned, her plum coloured lips curling up in a way that drove the boys nuts.

"Hey Diane, good day?" Evelyn asked.

"I got my belly button pierced, wanna see?" Diane, raised the hem or her t-shirt and flashed the newest piercing.

"Oh. That's…pretty" Evelyn gave the girl a grin then dropped her gaze to her list "Um, let me see, your guidance councillor called and wanted to make sure you where working on your art project because he hasn't seen you doing any work at school" Evelyn said firmly.

"Yeah, I don't like workin there, I feel like it…smothers me, ya know?" Diane was bobbing her head as she spoke "I have been working though Evie I swear, I can show you it if you want, it's up in my room?" she smiled, her tone sincere.

Evelyn had no reason to doubt the girl who, while troubled, was a genuinely nice, hard working young woman. "Well, after dinner I'll see it and you can explain every thing to me about where you are with it and what it's about, and then tomorrow I can call the councillor for you and tell him you really are working" Evelyn smiled at her.

Diane grinned brightly "All rightie Evie. Hey you need any help with the dinner?" she asked.

"Will you lay the table for me tonight?" Evelyn asked "The boys are doing the dishes and the twins promised to take the trash out, so that can be your job" she smiled.

"Sure thing, just gimme a yell when you need me? I'm gonna go up stairs and work on this project some more, hey you know Jack gave me some of his sketches to use…he's pretty good Evie" Diane stated "And uh, he was messing with my guitar today" she chewed her lip.

"Oh Diane, I'll tell him not to, I know you don't like people messing with your things" Evelyn sighed.

"Actually…he was kinda good at that too. You know he's got a really creative streak running through him…he can use my guitar to practice on but you might want to think about getting him one of his own, he's really into music" Diane raised her eyebrows.

"Really?" Evelyn said thoughtfully "I was thinking about getting him some lessons in something…you think music? Alright, I'll see what I can do" she grinned at Diane who winked at her cheekily and skipped out of the room.

Evelyn made another tick on her list "Jeremiah!" she called.

Jeremiah Mercer was sixteen and according to Evelyn's list, he had been acting out in school again.

As the slender young black man sat down, Evelyn fixed him with a serious look. He met her eyes and held her gaze for a while. Then he broke "Aw Ma, that kid was talking shit about Angel and Bobby, he was threatening to go to the cops with lies about shit they didn't do!" he told her "I told him to back off and he started hassling me so I hit him" he stated.

"You know Jerry, none of you boys are perfect but you more than the others are the level headed one…now if this boy started it, you cant be expected not to react but it's not like you to be violent" Evelyn stated "You couldn't have spoken to him?" she asked.

"Ma, he was flat out dumber than dirt. I coulda talked to him till I was blue in the face and he wouldn't have backed off" he told her "I'm sorry…but he was asking for it" he gave her an apologetic look and shrugged.

Evelyn sighed "Well…you're grounded for the rest of the month. And I want you to help the twins learn about Alaska, they might be living up there eventually" she told him.

"_Alaska!_" Jerry raised an eyebrow "Damn"

"Yeah, I know. It's not a definite thing yet but try and make em feel better about it being a possibility?" Evelyn asked him.

"Sure Ma. I really am sorry" Jerry gave her a sheepish grin.

"Go one" Evelyn squeezed his arm lovingly and sent him on his way. Before he left, Jeremiah leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.

"Angel!" she yelled.

Angel and his ego rolled into the room, bopping his head to some internal music Evelyn couldn't hear. "Hey Ma, you know them twins? They're kind of creepy" he said matter of factly.

"You know you're not the first one to say that but if I hear you say that too them, I'll make you sorry. Now sit. What's this I'm hearing about you wanting to join the _army?_" she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Not like, right now Ma!" Angel smirked.

"Yeah not now, you're fifteen years old! Why the army, what about college?" Evelyn asked as Angel dropped into the seat opposite her.

"Ma, we both know I don't have the right kind of smarts to go to college. But I got the right kind to be a soldier. Look it aint a definite thing, it's just…something I've been thinking about…my record, most colleges aint gonna let me in any how" he gave her a slight frown.

Evelyn didn't like to admit it but Angel had a point. As intelligent as he was, his smarts where street smarts. Angel never had been the academic type but he was by no means stupid. He was right saying that he would be better off in something more practical. She looked at him. Angel, like Jeremiah had gotten much taller as he aged. Where Jeremiah had retained his slender physique and seemed too have peaked at about five feet ten inches, Angel was five nine and still growing, and had bulked up, nature doing some of the work, hours at the gym doing the rest to turn the what had been potential into reality. Angel had biffed up, toned and carved his body into something to be proud of. Even as he sat before her now wearing an oversized sweater, Evelyn could see the muscles on his arms straining the seams just a little.

"Oh and uh, no more tattoo's for a while, yeah?" she warned.

Angel looked as if he might try to lie his way out of it but she gave him a knowing smirk. "I know what goes on in this house Angel…just remember, you shouldn't just get tats because the look cool, each one should mean something special to you. Like say…a big picture of me on your back" she joked.

Angel smiled at her, running a hand over his fuzzy hair "Will you cut my hair later?" he asked her.

"All off again?" she asked.

"Yep?" he raised an eyebrow in question.

"Sure. Send Bobby in will ya, I'm sick of yellin!" she took a long swig of her tea.

Angel stood up, gave her a peck on the cheek and walked out "Bobby!" he hollered, loud enough that Evelyn winced "Ma wants you!"

Evelyn heard some one walking down the stairs and within seconds, Bobby, the oldest Mercer kid swaggered into the room.

Bobby seemed to have stopped growing at about five feet nine. He too had bulked up, but he had Angels muscles on Jeremiah's frame. He keot his dark hair long but slicked back away from his face and had finally grown into the battered old leather jacket he had owned for years.

"Hey Ma, you think my moustache is coming in yet?" he asked as he dropped into the seat opposite her.

Evelyn made a show of squinting at the faint, lightly coloured fuzz Bobby had been growing over the last few weeks. "Um…yeah" she lied.

"Fuckin A, I'm gonna grow out my side burns, have em all joined up like a biker" he grinned wickedly "It's gonna be so cool, I'll be like" he drew his fingers across his top lip and along his cheeks to meet up with sideburns "Yeah" he chuckled to himself.

"Watch your mouth for starters. And the reason you're here? You have to make a decision so I can call Martin later, do you want to do the three months at juvie or the community service?" she asked.

Bobby, again, was in trouble with the cops. He and a friend of his from the neighbourhood had been out joy riding in a stolen car and had managed to knock down a lamp post.

"Whats the community service?" Bobby tapped his fingers on the table, looking around the room distractedly.

Evelyn checked her notes "It is…six weeks working for the city, you'd have to do a few hours before and after school everyday and all day weekends, uh, garbage collecting or with the street sweepers, what ever job they gave you" she explained.

"Damn" Bobby hissed "I'll do the service, theres a jerk in juvie from the month I did last summer who'll kick my ass if I go back in there" he sniffed casually "Oh and guess what? I got a C on that history report" he grinned.

Evelyn noted his choice on her list and smiled at him "Well done! Keep studying that could improve" she told him.

Bobby smiled at her and wriggled his shoulders in a thank you "So can I go out tonight?" he smiled hopefully.

"Ooh, let me think-no" Evelyn pulled a joking 'shocked' face as Bobby grumbled good naturedly.

"Go get Jack for me will ya?" she asked Bobby.

Bobby leaned over and gave her a kiss the way his brothers had the strutted out. A minute later he returned carrying Jack upside down by the legs.

"Ma I couldn't find Jack but this weird upside kid was there instead" he shrugged.

"I'm gonna puke on you shoes" Jack half laughed half moaned.

Bobby dropped him quickly but Jack caught himself just in time to avoid serious injury.

He stood, slugging Bobby on the arm as Bobby left again, then walked over and sat in the seat opposite Evelyn.

Evelyn took a second to just look at him. When he had first come to her, Jack had been a scared, traumatised little boy. Now, at ten, after a lot of work, he was finally starting to recover from the horrific abuses of his childhood. Jack still suffered from night terrors but where they had been a nightly occurrence two and three years ago, it was now rare for him to have an attack over a period of months. And when he did, it would no longer simply happen, it would usually be triggered by something. His shyness was gone, he could, as Evelyn had discovered, actually a pretty out going kid, making friends easily at school, fitting in well with his class mates. When he wasn't fighting with them or getting into trouble for the stuff he did with Bobby, Angel and Jerry. Five months into Jacks first year with the Mercers, it had been discovered that Jack was quite the talented pick pocket, and that he had a border line obsessive compulsion to steal. He also had a scarily good eye for loot worth taking. As with all the kids she cared for, Evelyn did her best to keep Jack on the straight and narrow, but every day that he got older, got further away from his own past, Jack became that bit more independent, and more wayward. He was a sweet, sensitive little boy but Evelyn worried sometimes that he was straying down the wrong path more and more often than she could draw him back to the right one. She also worried that as social he could be, he also spent a lot of time alone, in his room or sitting on the roof of the porch. While he had come out of the shell he had existed in when he first arrived, he could still be extremely introverted sometimes and Evelyn was concerned about what awful memories he might be dredging up when left alone with nothing to distract him.

Jack was tall for ten. He was almost lanky, enough so to hint that he would be a tall adult. His hair, as Evelyn had predicted, was lightening with every passing summer. She suspected it would and up being a sort of, muddy blonde or sandy brown. He was a handsome kid too, and Evelyn suspected it wouldn't be long before the girls in his class started to notice. That was another concern she had. Given the abuse Jack had suffered and the fact that he still had nightmares about what had been done to him, and that he had one or two intimacy issues-he didn't always like to be hugged or touched, some days more or less so than others' Evelyn wondered if he would be alright when it came to dealing with the opposite sex.

"When you gonna adopt me Ma?" Jack asked flat out, snapping her back into focus.

"You know I talk to Maria every day about that" she reminded him "And I actually have some news" she smiled warmly at him.

Jack's emergency placement had been made a fixed placement six months after he first came to Evelyn's home. As soon as it had been done, Evelyn had begun to inquire about legally adopting Jack but there had been problems in the processing and as a result, the adoption couldn't seem to carry through.

Then recently, Maria had discovered something that had fouled up the already foul works. I t was bad enough that Evelyn almost didn't want to tell him, for fear he might relapse into his old emotional ways. "Jack I have to tell you something pretty big" Evelyn said seriously.

Jacks grin dropped from his face and his eyes took on the carefully blank gaze he adopted whenever he had to hear bad news. It was as if he was cutting himself off from his emotions and Evelyn didn't like it but she figured it kept him sane, so she didn't push him about it.

"Maria went to talk to, um…to your dad again, about seeing if he would legally give you up for adoption so that I could legally adopt you and, well he was being awkward again but Zach, you know Maria's boy friend? Well he's a lawyer and he told Maria that because of how much time has passed, since your dad was imprisoned, and because there's no named birth mother in the picture and because I've had you for so long, basically all of that adds up and means that legally, the state can simply sign your dad off as your guardian" she explained.

"So you would be able to adopt me?" Jack asked, his face still grave but with the faintest hint of excitement trickling into his voice.

"I would. Except that…your dad…has a sister" Evelyn made very sure to keep her voice steady.

"So?" Jack frowned and shrugged.

"Well…well your Aunt, she didn't know you even existed, you see your father was estranged from his family, your grandparents, for a long time, but recently, he's reached out, made contact. He claims to be a changed man" she said, actually unable to keep the venom from her voice. "He reconnected with his family and while his own parents wont see him, his sister will. And she knows about you now…and there is a law, when it comes to foster kids that if there is any living blood relative to the child, that relative must be asked if they are…if they would be willing to take that child in…see they don't like to break families up too much" Evelyn had curled her hand into a fist and was digging her nails into the palm of her hand to keep her self calm. "If your aunt says she would be willing…there is a very real possibility that she could get custody of you" she said quietly, having to force herself to meet his eyes.

They stayed resolutely blank as he cocked his head to one side "So I would have to go with her, even if I didn't want to?" he asked.

"The state feels that fostered and orphaned kids have a better chance in life of staying on the straight and narrow, if they live with some one directly related to them, or some one who was close to their family…they think it helps the kid maintain an identity if they grow up in an environment where their family members can remind them of their parents" Evelyn paraphrased what she had been told by Maria, who was as disgusted by the situation as Evelyn was.

"But I don't want to go with her" Jack repeated slowly.

"I know that sweetie and believe you me I will fight this to the bitter end but the fact is, it's the law, Maria has got to ask this woman if she would be willing to take you in. If she says no, which I think is likely, then you're mine" Evelyn tried to reassure him.

"How can you be sure she'll say no?" Jack asked, the first thread of anger weaving into his voice.

A month after he first arrived Jack, seven at the time, had had a temper tantrum in reaction to a near miss with a local creep. It had not been the last, and while it hadn't happened in a while Evelyn knew full well the damage a raging Jack could do.

"Jackie she's never even met you" Evelyn told him "she's probably got her own life just the way she wants it…you're a charmer but can you see her dropping everything to adopt a kid she didn't know existed until just now? I love you kid but you're not _that_ sweet" Evelyn hoped a joke would get through to him and it did, to a certain point.

He blinked and gave her a weak smile that didn't chase that blankness from his eyes. "You're right Ma, they wouldn't take me away from you, who could look after me better than you can?" he shrugged at his own question.

"Exactly" Evelyn grinned.

"I'm gonna go watch TV until dinner's ready, okay?" Jack asked.

Evelyn nodded mutely and Jack rose from his seat, gave her her kiss on the cheek and walked out without another word.

Within seconds her three adopted sons appeared from the kitchen "Ma?" Angel asked her "Could they really take him?" his face was a mask of confusion and anger.

"Yeah, they really could" Evelyn said weakly "It's a very real possibility" she looked up at her sons "They might take our Jackie away" she whispered as her voice broke.

Her sons came to her, surrounding her, hugging her and soothing her as she fought to compose herself, not wanting any of the other kids, and most importantly Jack, to se her upset.

"Is there anything we can do to fight it?" Jerry asked as he fetched her a tissue from the box on the table.

Evelyn shrugged, at a rare loss "Maria said she's going to do everything she can to help us, she said she would exaggerate Jack's problems, make it seem like he would be a difficult kid to take on but that's all she can do-she can overstate things but if she out right lies, and gets caught doing it, she could lose her job and all the cases she's ever worked could come under review-if the 'powers that be' saw fit they could undo every placement she's ever made, including you three" Evelyn wiped at her eyes with the tissue "I guess we can do the same, they'll probably send some one to talk to us about Jack, maybe even this aunt her self will come around…but there's no way of knowing it'll work. Besides if we make him look too nuts they might decide he's better off in one of those group homes where they can sedate him if he becomes too much of a handful" she slumped over the table, cradling her chin in her hands, her fingers covering her mouth as if she was going to be ill.

"We could kidnap him, hide him some where?" Angel suggested.

Evelyn fixed him with a glare but his sincere face made her smile a watered down version of her usual beaming grin.

"Some how I think that would make things worse" she told him.

Bobby ran his hands through his hair angrily "They're not putting him with his fathers sister. After what that scum fuck did to him they want to put Jack with people who are gonna remind him every fucking day of the prick who…who did all that awful shit to him!" he seethed, fighting to keep his voice low.

"Yeah, Ma, that's fucked up what are they thinking about?" Jerry agreed and Angel nodded emphatically.

"It's the new system" Evelyn shook her head.

"It's fucking twisted" Angel growled, feeding off Bobby's anger.

"If she tries to take him from us, I'll kill the bitch" Bobby snarled.

"You'll do no such thing" Evelyn said, her voice quiet but steely "I hate this too but we have to remember, if she does take him…she isn't his father, she had nothing to do with what that man did to Jack" she whispered "But…" she took a deep, calming breath "We're getting ahead of our selves, like I told Jack, I cant see her wanting to adopt a ten year old, emotionally damaged boy wit whom she has no previous relationship" she shrugged, her tone implying that she was trying to convince her self of her statement as much as she was them. "Maria's going to call me some time over the next few days, let me know what's happening"

She sighed and stood, and gathering her things, walked wordlessly into the kitchen.

The boys watched her go in silence, the reality of what could happen weighing heavily on their minds.

Before very long, Evelyn called everyone for dinner, and they gathered around the table.

"Jack will you say grace?" Evelyn asked.

They all took hands and bowed their heads as Jack started "Thanks you god for this food, bless those who don't have any tonight, and hope that someday they find some one like Ma to help them out"

A chorus of enthusiastic 'amens' echoed around the table and Evelyn chuckled and sat down.

"Dig in!" she grinned.

The kids joined her in sitting and began reaching for the various bowls of salad, vegetables, meat and potatoes.

They talked as they served them selves and one another dinner, chatting, joking, getting along the way a family should. Everyone was included, no one would be left out of a conversation or joke, unless they where too young to hear something racy. Evelyn insisted that whether it was just her and the boys, or if they had other kids living with them, their home would be a noisy one, alive with conversation or music or just the sounds of children being as happy as they where able. She also insisted on her kids, whether they where actually hers or not, having proper manners so as the kids passed the bowls around, asked for the salad tongs, rose to reach the gravy, Evelyn reminded them of their 'pleases' and 'thank you's'. She laughed but tried to cover it as Angel gave the twins, who where finishing one anothers sentences as the spoke to Diane, a scared look and shuddered. Jack noticed Angels reaction and caught his attention, giving him an agreeing look. Evelyn chuckled quietly, then had to pretend to scratch her forehead to hide the tears that welled up in her eyes. The phone rang, startling her, and she excused her self from the table, heading into the kitchen to answer it.

"Evelyn" Maria's voice sounded on the other end.

Evelyn felt her stomach drop. "Maria?" she said by way of greeting.

"I talked to her" Maria's voice was quiet, "her name is Amelia…she uh….she wants to meet with Jack, to see what kind of kid he is"

"Oh God" Evelyn breathed.

Maria sounded sad as she continued "Apparently, she's a reformed addict, heroin, but because of the amazing progress she has made, she still counts as a potential guardian. Once she meets Jack, she'll have to decide whether she wants to take him or not and if she does…that's it, he goes with her"

Evelyn pressed her hand to her mouth "When does she want to see him?" she whispered, aware that if she spoke too loud she might be heard by the kids in the dining room.

"As soon as possible, probably by the end of the week" Maria sounded as angry about the situation as Evelyn was.

She had been the one to remove Jack from his fathers home in the first place, and she had seen him grow and mature as much as Evelyn had.

"And if she wants to take him…how long will we have before he'll have to leave?" Evelyn marvelled at her own calmness.

"Well…she's already passed the home visit, and given that she's immediate family, it wont take that long to clear her…maybe a month…at most" the words fell into Evelyn's ears like lead weights and she leaned heavily against the wall.

"A _month?_" Evelyn repeated "Maria I need more time than that, we all do, we can't just rush him out of here in a month!"

"Evelyn you know, if I could fight this I would but…" Maria trailed off "If she says she wants him, that's it. All I can say is maybe you should find way to scare her off, if she thinks he's-"

"I've told the boys that already" Evelyn said softly "I guess I could suggest it to Jack…he'll probably go for it" she allowed her self a tiny, sad smile "That's it, we'll scare her off" she resolved.

"Good plan. Look I'll have to go, but I thought you should know…I'll call you when I know exactly what's going to happen" Maria sounded sad, tired.

"Thanks…talk to you soon" Evelyn said, and hung up.

She pressed both hands to her mouth, feeling a resigned sadness fill her. Evelyn had been fostering kids for years, she had always known that any child who came to her could potentially leave, be placed in a new home or adopted, or even in the happier cases, be reunited with loving family. But Jack was different. Not only had Evelyn her self come to see him as one of her own, her boys had too. Angel, Jerry and Bobby had 'adopted' Jack as a sibling shortly after his arrival in the house, forging a bond with him that Evelyn knew would never be broken.

She had seen how they had reacted to the possibility that this woman might come into Jacks life. Now it was a reality. Evelyn wasn't sure what might happen. And wasn't sure she wanted to know.


	4. Chapter 4

I promised didnt I? And here it is!It's a wee bit shorter than the rest but thats a one off because the next one is going to be much bigger, and agin, will be posted within a couple of days!

Same Disclaimers as always, language and content and all of that, please R+R as i plan to marry all my reviewers you glorious wonderful people!

Oh my Goodness, Thanks you to Reviewer Jannie for pointing out a terrible and potentially offenesive mistake i made in my description of one of the police officers, i have corrected it now and i am SO sorry if i caused any offence it was a genuine typo and a mistake on my part, once again, im so sorry to any one who may have been offended, please dont think badly of me as i would never entertain such thoughts, the word it looks like i've used actually disgusts me.

Sorry and thanks again.

* * *

The tall young woman sat primly on Evelyn's sofa, her hands folded casually in her lap. Her brownish/blonde hair was combed neatly in a demure, simple bob, but there where layers cut in that, if styled properly, could make the hair style sexy and her face was made up perfectly, in that subtle way that seems simple but in reality takes ages to apply. Her dress was cut just on the knee and she wore a fashionable but basic cardigan. There was a flash of gold at her throat, a small cross on a chain.

She had Jack's eyes. And his same curving, cupids bow lips. The cardigan had long sleeves, Evelyn noticed, to hide the scars from her track marks.

"When I found out I had a nephew I was…shocked to say the least…John was sort of a…I guess you'd call it a player…in high school, he had a different girl every week…so to find out that my brother had gone out, met a girl, stayed with her long enough to get her pregnant…it was surprising. I, my self, never had kids. Like my brother I had some problems with…drinking, and drugs. I'm not proud of my past but, I've moved on. I've gotten cleaned up, I've got a job working for a small publishers near my home…I built a new life for myself…it wasn't easy" her pretty little forehead wrinkled slightly as she frowned.

Evelyn thought bitter thoughts.

"And then one day, I get this phone call out of the blue…you see when we where younger, my brother got into drugs, drinking…our parents gave him an ultimatum, 'get clean or get out'…John like his drugs too much, so he left. I followed in his foot steps a few months later. I would go back every now and then, when I needed money, or when I thought I could get clean again. John never went back, never even called. Our parents…they just tried to move on, forget about him. I had a close call one day…and it turned me around, it's what made me clean up. Then like I said, I got this call out of the blue, six months ago. It's John, and he's in prison and he tells me the reason he's there is because he did these terrible things to…to his son" her eyed grew shiny with unshed tears. "I had this little nephew I never even knew about who went through all this terrible stuff…I couldn't believe it" she shook her head "My brother…he's changed…he's gotten clean in prison, and my god, he's so sorry for what he did-" she leaned forward slightly as she spoke and Evelyn fixed her with an un forgiving glare.

"I can assure you Amelia, he's not sorry enough" Evelyn stated.

Amelia drew back and dropped her gaze slightly, nodding "Of course he can't" she said quietly.

"Amelia…Miss Keenan, let me be frank with you. Why are you here?" Evelyn asked.

Amelia Keenan, Jack's aunt, looked up again "I know that you have taken care of Jack these past few years. And I know he probably doesn't want to be any where near me"

"There is no 'probably' about it" Evelyn almost growled.

"I just want to show him that not everyone in his real family is as bad as his father" Amelia stated.

"Well considering his father that shouldn't be too hard but I still don't understand what you think you will achieve by coming here today" Evelyn tilted her head.

"I want to meet my nephew" Amelia shrugged.

Evelyn sighed angrily. "Fine, but there are some things you need to know about him before you meet him" Evelyn told her "First things first, don't try to touch him, Jack sometimes has issues with being touched by people, even people he knows, even just a hug. He has his father to think for that. Don't get too excited or raise your voice to him, don't try to force him to look at you. If he doesn't want to meet your eye, don't try to make him, he will lose it"

Amelia nodded carefully.

"I'll go get him" Evelyn stood from her chair and walked out of the den and into the kitchen.

Jack was sitting at the counter, sketching something with Diane.

Diane gave Evelyn a serious look as she walked in. "Jackie? She wants to see you now" Evelyn said quietly.

Jack sighed and laid down his pencil, sliding wordlessly off his chair. He walked over to Evelyn and took her hand, clutching it tightly.

Evelyn gave his hand a comforting squeeze and walked with him into the den. Jack ducked behind Evelyn slightly so that all Amelia would see of him was one side of his face, one of his eyes.

He stepped close to Evelyn's back and even though he wasn't quite touching her, she could feel the shivers running through him.

"Jack, this is your aunt Amelia. Amelia Keenan, this is Jack" Evelyn gave Jacks hand a little tug to coax him forward.

He stepped out from behind her but still stayed close to her.

"Hello Jack" Amelia gave him a smile.

Jack stared at her.

"Look how big you are!" She exclaimed "You're ten? Wow, I remember when I was ten, it was a lot of fun" she nodded.

Jack looked up at Evelyn for his cue. "Go on" Evelyn whispered.

"Hi" Jack said quietly.

Evelyn moved and sat down in her seat, Jack barely detaching himself from her side as she did so. He stood beside her chair, still gripping her hand.

Amelia looked as if she was trying to think of things to say.

"What…what do you like to do for fun?" She asked.

Jack gave her a cynical look that actually amused the hell out of Evelyn although she didn't let it show. "I like lots of stuff I guess" Jack shrugged.

"Yeah? Do you like…riding you bike? Or sports?" Amelia, Evelyn hated to admit, really was making the effort.

"I like drawing. And playing hockey. And stealing" Jack said the last with a look daring Amelia to respond negatively.

Amelia's eyes widened in shock and she nodded "Stealing huh?" she asked.

"Yep" Jack, his confidence growing in reaction her shock, replied with a tiny smirk.

"What do you steal?" she asked him, acting as if she wasn't bothered by it.

"What ever the fuck I want" Jack stated, more than a hint of his brothers attitudes in his voice.

"Jack!" Evelyn scolded.

Amelia blinked "Have you ever gotten caught?" she asked.

"Not yet"

"Well…I think given how hard your life has been you're entitled to be a little…rebellious" Amelia told him.

"What do you want?" Jack asked, sounding tired.

"Jack, you're family" Amelia told him "And I think you belong with family" she shrugged. "I want you to come and live with me" she said and the words cut through Evelyn like a knife.

She gasped out loud and Jack ran from the room. He charged up the stairs and Evelyn glared at Amelia.

Amelia glared right back "I have a legal right to take him" she stated.

"He hates you and he's terrified of you" Evelyn hissed.

"Well I want to teach him to love me. I'm his aunt, I'm the only family he's got" Amelia said.

Evelyn rose from her seat "I'm going to call Maria, and my attorney" she spat.

"What about Jack?" Amelia made as if to walk toward the stairs.

"Don't you dare follow him. His brothers are up there, they'll talk to him" Evelyn stepped bodily in front of Amelia.

The woman sighed but nodded and sat back down.

Evelyn stalked into the kitchen and snatched up the phone, wiping at her eyes as she did.

Angel sat in Jack's bed room, his back pressed to the closed door, his legs braced on the floor. Jerry stood in front of him, holding his hands out to his sides, trying his hardest to keep Bobby from tearing through the door.

"Bobby, Jack doesn't need this" Jerry hissed right in Bobby's face.

Jack was sitting on his bed where Jerry had sat him down after pulling him back _in_ through the window. Jack had been meaning to leave.

"All I'm gonna do is throw her out on her ass" Bobby seethed "She's not taking him away from us" he ducked again as if to move past Jerry.

Jerry moved with him, blocking his path and Bobby gave him a look that Jerry had seen make men twice his size back off from Bobby.

Jerry however, simply raised an eyebrow "You're scaring your brother" he said quietly.

The words had the desired affect and Bobby wheeled around to see Jack hugging his knees on the bed, his face streaked with tears as his body shook with deep, hiccoughing sobs. His eyes where wide and panicked and he was watching the near fight with something akin to terror plastered across his face.

"Shit" Bobby's shoulders slumped and he ran to the bed, sitting beside Jack and pulling the boy into a hug "I'm sorry Jackie boy, I'm sorry" he whispered.

Jerry sat on the edge of the bed.

Angel, still sitting by the door, shook his head "We gotta be able to fight this" he stated.

"I'm not going with her, she's his sister she'll be like him!" Jack sobbed in Bobby's arms.

"She won't be like your dad Jack" Jerry tried to comfort him.

Bobby was rocking Jack from side to side, his face a grim mask. "I'm gonna tell you guys something, something no body but Ma and Maria know" he said quietly.

"Before I came here, when I still lived at home I had a baby brother called Tommy. He was…he had some problems, handicaps they called 'em. Meant he was always smiling, always happy" Bobby gave a weak smile "He was like…he could make even the shittiest, most awful day better just by being in a room cause he would be smiling and it would…light up the room" his voice was uncharacteristically gentle. "My dad killed him. He hit him too hard one day, broke something inside of his head. I wasn't there when it happened. I had gone out to steal some shit from some guy and I had left Tommy alone and our father took offence to Tommy smiling and he murdered him" his voice quavered but Bobby would never cry in front of his brothers.

"Bobby…Jesus…I'm sorry man" Angel said quietly.

"When I came here I was all fucked up over Tommy but…you three fixed that. You don't know it but all together you three are Tommy" Bobby told them "I abandoned him, I screwed up and he died because of it. I swore to my self I was never gonna let one of my brothers get hurt because of me again. I'm gonna hurt her so she doesn't come back" he said quietly.

"Bobby don't be stupid" Jerry sighed "You do anything like that and not only will they pack you off to jail, they'll probably take all of us away from mom, not to mention away from each other" he stated.

"So what we should just sit back and let this happen?" Bobby asked.

"No, but we find a way to fix it that doesn't involve us actually being arrested!" Jerry snapped.

Jack was shaking his head back and forth, over and over again "No, I don't want Ma to lose everybody because of me" he told them.

"You're not saying you're gonna go with her?" Bobby looked at him sharply.

"No! But if you let me leave then Ma doesn't get in trouble and I still get away" he told them.

Bobby pushed Jack back a little and pulled the sleeve of his sweater down over his hand. He wiped the tears from Jack's face as he spoke "Kid if you leave, you'll die" he said softly "You're a tough little SOB but I doubt you'd last all that long" he forced a laugh.

Jack shook his head "No. You heard Ma, you heard her…if that lady wants to take me, and if she's passed all the…interviews and shit…then that's it…I'm hers now. I'm not staying here just so they can make me go with her!" he yelled and started for the window again.

Bobby caught him and dragged him backwards but Jack elbowed him viciously and struggled free. He squirmed through the window and out onto the roof of the porch, running for the edge of the roof. Jerry cursed and followed him out as Angel moved away from the door and ran out onto the landing "Ma!" he yelled, taking the stairs two at a time.

Bobby followed him down the stairs as out on the roof Jerry yelled at Jack to stop.

Jack froze at the edge of the roof. He shot an angry look back at Jerry and lowered himself over the lip of the ledge, letting himself drop until his arms stretched out over his head. With a little kick, to carry him away from the side of the house, he let go, falling through the air.

Angel caught him with an 'ooof' sound, falling backwards with Jack in his arms.

Jack screamed wordlessly, trying to struggle against Angel but Bobby joined his brother, holding Jack's arms down as Jack tried to claw at Angels hands. Angel rolled onto his side, taking Jack with him as Bobby held Jack's wrists together.

"Ma!" Bobby shouted, "Ma hurry up!"

Evelyn raced out side and knelt beside the boys, tearing off the sweater she wore over her dress and bunching up under Jack's head as he thumped against the floor.

Angel moved so that he knelt at Jack's feet and gripped the child's ankles, holding his feet down.

"Jack!" Evelyn held Jack's head and spoke quietly and calmly "Jack calm down, just calm down" she soothed.

She shot a look at Amelia who stood on the steps leading up to the house, watching the scene with wide eyes.

"Jackie boy, come on now" Evelyn soothed "Hush now, take deep breaths sweetie"

Jack made a high, pained sound in the back of his throat and abruptly went still, squeezing his eyes shut.

Kneeling at his head, Evelyn took a deep breath and blew it out, stroking his cheek with her thumb.

"Bobby will you?" she asked Bobby.

Bobby, blinking back tears nodded silently and scooped Jack up.

Jack wrapped his arms around Bobby's neck and rested his head on his shoulder. Bobby carried Jack to the house, shooting Amelia a murderous glance as he approached her "Move" he snapped.

Amelia frowned at him but backed into the house so that Bobby could climb the stairs. Diane, and the other foster children stood in the hall and as he passed, Bobby gave Diane a look "Could you please take the others into the kitchen and get them something to eat?" he asked, his voice strained.

Angel followed Bobby as he walked up stairs where a waiting Jerry greeted him. Wordlessly, Jerry took Jack out of Bobby's arms. Jack began sobbing again as Jerry shushed him soothingly and Bobby turned at the top of the stairs staring down at Amelia.

"That's no where near as bad as his…attacks can get" Evelyn told Amelia as she walked back into the house "In fact that was barely a blip, in comparison. And the reason he does this? Has violent tantrums? His father"

Amelia shook her head "I think it's deplorable that you would stage this little scene to try to scare me off" she said very calmly "really, I'm shocked"

Evelyn raised an eyebrow at her "Please. If I was going to stage something, I would have told him to set your car on fire. I wouldn't have made him go through one of these" she made an all encompassing gesture with her hand.

Amelia shook her head again "Well it didn't work. He's mine, by law, and by blood. I will be taking him just as soon as I'm allowed to" her voice hardened slightly as she tried to intimidate Evelyn.

Evelyn folded her arms and Stared Amelia down until Amelia realised she wasn't going to win a contest of wills, gathered her things, and left the house.

Evelyn turned to look at her gathered brood. She seemed to be thinking seriously for well over a minute, then, with finality and with feeling she said "Shit"

* * *

The burly police officer held Angel, Bobby and Jerry back as best he could, yelling at them to calm down. His partner stood preparedly beside Evelyn, ready to move should she, like her sons, try to physically prevent what was happening.

Jack's wailing screams filled the air as a third officer tried to carry him out of the house. "Ma!" his voice was high and panicked as he sobbed "Ma please don't make me go!" he screamed pitifully.

Evelyn openly wept, shaking her head apologetically as the cop struggling with Jack tried lifting him instead of just pulling him along. Jack had wrapped his hands around the banister of the stairs though, and was refusing to let go.

Maria stood by the door, her face a mask of conflicted emotions. Amelia stood beside her, carrying the small suitcase belonging to Jack.

Evelyn's other fosters where at the top of the stairs, Diane holding the sobbing twins to her, Li standing beside her frowning sadly.

"Come on kid" the cop whispered, "Please" he hissed as Jack tightened his grip on the banister.

"Ma!" Jack screamed again "Please!"

Evelyn, without moving forward, held out her hands and began to shush Jack, trying to soothe him even as she shook with sobs.

Bobby, Angel and Jerry where yelling in the cops face as they tried to get around him without actually touching him and giving him an excuse, even a weak one, to arrest them for assaulting an officer.

"NO!" Jack actually shrieked as the cop managed to get prise one of Jack's hands from the banister rail, so Jack changed tack and let go with his other hand so suddenly that the cop staggered backwards and let go of Jack.

Jack ran towards Evelyn but the officer standing besides her, a man whose name tag read Doyle, crouched and caught a hold of him. Jack was reaching for Evelyn, screaming for her over and over again and as she relented and took a step toward her, the officer who had been holding Jack originally, a man named Harris, moved between her and Jack, holding his hands up in a 'stop' gesture. He shook his head wordlessly, his face grim and apologetic as Doyle began to herd Jack toward the door.

Jack realised Evelyn couldn't help him. "Bobby!" he screamed.

"Jack!" Bobby yelled over the cops shoulder.

"Bobby! Angel!" Jack cried "Jerry!"

This cop was bigger, stronger, and less sympathetic that his companion and was winning in his struggle to get Jack to the door.

"Bobby!" Jack voice had reached that point where pure terror was winning over.

His voice was straining, higher than was natural as he realised that he wasn't going to win.

"No" he said, his tone actually one of surprise "NO!" he kicked the cop in the shin and ran around him to ward his brothers who gave up on being polite and simply shoved the cop aside, the three of them embracing Jack as he reached them.

Evelyn ran to join them as the two cops, Doyle and Harris, waded into them, trying to pull them apart. Jack was screaming, clinging to his brothers, too his mother. Evelyn held onto his arm but the big cop, Harris, pulled her back, trying to pull her hands free of Jack's. Doyle picked Jack up around the waist as the third officer, a younger guy named Smith ran to help. Smith tried to unwind the boy's grips on Jack as Doyle tried to just pull Jack backwards. Harris wrestled with Evelyn's hands, grimacing as he had to squeeze her hand just this side of painfully to make her relent. Doyle walked staggeringly backwards and some how, began to gain ground as his fellow officers restrained the Mercers. With one final tug, Jack came free and Doyle didn't hesitate in rushing him out of the door. The boys rose to follow but Evelyn, exhausted, stood where she was.

Amelia had already started the car as Angel, Jerry and Bobby made it out side and she peeled out of their drive way, Jack in her backseat banging on the window like a prisoner.

"Jack!" Angel roared.

"You fuckin _Bitch!_" Bobby yelled after the car.

Jerry, breathless, doubled over panting, staring after the car with tears in his eyes. He shook his head in disbelief.

Several neighbours where peering out of their curtains or walking out into the street to see what all the commotion was about.

A lady from the house next door jogged over their lawn, staring at the two police cruisers. "Boys what happened!" she asked in alarm.

Bobby screamed curses and Angel shook his head silently, emotion making it impossible for him to answer, so the woman turned to the still panting Jerry and repeated her question.

Jerry stood up straight, his lip quivering and whispered, his voice hoarse and strained "Jack"


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five already! Alrightie, content for language, talk of drugs and abuse.

I dont own any of the FB crew, alas.

I love each and everyone of my reviewers and want to shower them with kisses and love, oh and for those who havent, check out 'Hopeful tears for lost years' a fan fic by a reviewer of mine based on my last chapter, its fantastic and if you liked mine you'll like this!

R+R and Chapter six will be up soon!

* * *

Bobby was sitting on the porch steps of the house, staring out over the neighbourhood. His jaw was clenched so tight that it almost looked painful and Angel fancied he could hear the creak of Bobby's teeth wearing down.

"How's Ma?" Bobby asked, as Angel sat on the step just above Bobby.

"Diane made her some kinda herbal tea thing, chilled her out. I think there might have been weed in it, Diane's odd like that" Angel told him.

"Find out if there really is weed in it. And get me some" Bobby said blankly "This is fucked up" he sounded oddly resigned and it scared Angel.

"Look this bitch can't be that good of a person, she'll screw up and we'll get him back" Angel tried to comfort both Bobby and himself.

"To be honest that's part of what m worried about…what if she's a lousy parent and it screws him up again?" Bobby turned his head slightly, giving Angel his profile as he spoke to him "It took so long to get him to see us as people he could trust…sending him away with people he's terrified of is bad enough but…she doesn't know him like we do, she wont know how to deal with it if he has a nightmare, or if he sleep walks, or if…" Bobby trailed off.

"If he needs help with his homework, she wont be able to help him out like Jerry does" Angel continued "She can't teach him how to fight for himself like we can, or teach him his manners like Ma would, or any of the things we do for him" he nodded slowly in agreement "I know man, it sucks"

"I just wanna fucking…hurt something" Bobby growled "Just break shit or hurt some one or…damn it just anything!" he curled his hands into fists.

Angel squeezed Bobby's shoulder just hard enough to hurt "Just chill out man" he said quietly, sympathetically.

The door creaked open and shut and a hand appeared in Angel's peripheral vision, holding a mug. "It's Irish Coffee" Jerry grimaced handing another mug to Bobby as Angel took his "Mrs Rebadow made them, she's in talking to Ma, suggested we three could do with a drink"

Bobby managed a short, cynical laugh "That lady always tries to get people drunk, you ever notice?" he asked. "like that time when I fell out of the tree and gave me a beer" he shook his head.

"Or when we came home early from the park that time cos it started snowing, remember? And none of us had our key and Ma was out, so Mrs Rebadow brought us in to her house" Angel chuckled.

"Oh my god! I remember that and she gave us brandy to warm up! And Jack got wasted!" Jerry laughed out loud.  
"Boy cant handle his drink" Bobby said emphatically.

"You remember when, uh, that Halloween when he scared you Bobby? He hid all under your bed and grabbed your ankles, man you screamed like a little bitch" Angel laughed.

Bobby shook his head "That wasn't funny, that was lame it wasn't funny" he tried to play it off but Angel and Jerry high fived as they laughed at him.

"Yeah well how about when you pushed him and he made you almost cry by saying he was gonna tell Ma you beat him up, Jerry!" Bobby shot back, grinning as he turned to glare at his brother.

"Oh I did _not_ almost cry!" Jerry scoffed.

"Oh yes you did" Angel nodded, grinning wide.

"Well he got you to, Angel, telling Sophi you said you wanted to marry her" Jerry reminded him and Bobby, who was sipping his coffee at the time spurted and choked, spitting coffee all over the lawn.

"And she went and bought bridal magazines!" He yelled, laughing uncontrollably "And Ma went nuts at you and Sophi was goin 'Ay Papi, I love yu mi amoooore'" he put on an accent and nasaly voice " 'oh we gonna have such a beautiful service and mi mami said I can wear her dress oh Aaaaaangel'" Bobby actually had to wipe tears of mirth from his eyes as Angel tried to act like he wasn't bothered by the teasing.

"Jackie has an evil little sense of humour sometimes" Jerry said sadly.

"Yeah but he's a genius at using it right" Angel stated "Kids got a mind for pranks like I don't know what" he tapped Jerry's shoulder "Remember thepet storething?"

Bobby burst out laughing againas Jerry, smiling, nodded slowly, seriously.

They _all_ remembered thepet storething.

"That was just cool" Bobby stated.

"look at us. We're talking like he died or something, he didn't die, he just aint around right now" Angel reminded them "We'll be able to see him again, that lady cant be that mean that she wouldn't at least let us, the people who've been his family for three years, visit with him" he shrugged.

"Bu til she decides when we _can_ see him, he's all alone with her" Bobby murmured.

* * *

Jack was hugging his knees as he sat on the floor on the far side of the small bed. There was a full length mirror in the room, on a stand, and Jack had moved it, standing it opposite himself and the door so that he would be able to keep his backto the door and hide behind the bed, but would see if any one came in. His eyes where fixed on the mirror, his gaze a defensive, angryversion of what he had heard his brothers call a 'thousand yard stare'.

He was rocking back and forth and he didn't like that he was because when he did it at home Bobby would always mimic him until he stopped. But now, Bobby wasn't here, and Jack was still rocking and he wanted to stop himself but he couldn't because the fear that was rolling around in his stomach and tensing all of his muscles until it was painful and Jack wanted to curl up into the smallest possible ball that he could and just disappear but his stupid body got in the way and so all he could do was sit and rock while the fear built up and up until he thought he would explode and he realised with a start that he was digging his own fingers into his arms so tightly that he was hurting him self but he couldn't stop because he could see the door reflected in the mirror and he kept expecting the door to open and-

Jack gasped suddenly and hurled himself across the room turning so that the door was facing him. He heard the creak at the top of the stairs, something he had taken note of when Amelia had first shown him where his room was hours ago. He had recorded it in his head automatically, just in case. Some one tried the handle. A tentative knock sounded on the door and Jack's eyes flicked to the small lock he had turned as soon as he was alone in the room.

"Jack? I made you some food, okay?" Amelia called through the door "It's a sandwich, and a soda and a candy bar for dessert" she told him "You want to open the door so I can bring it in?" she asked.

Jack stared intently at the door.

"Jack? I know you don't like this but that doesn't mean you cant eat" Amelia called.

Jack glanced around the room again, trying to see if there was anything he could use.

There was a lamp on the bedside table and he considered simply throwing it at the door…but then he might need it later for self defence, so he didn't want to waste it.

"Jack please?" Amelia tried.

Jack huddled himself in again, hugging his knees and thinking of home.

"Well I'll leave this here for you…" there was the sound of a tray being placed on the floor and a pregnant pause as if Amelia planned to say more, then the sounds of footsteps retreating from the door.

Jack thumped his head against the wall in frustration, trying to get his fear under control. He remembered being very small, his father drugging his food so that he wouldn't make a fuss when- He squeezed his eyes closed and remembered the sound of Evelyn-of his _mothers_ voice. She was singing to him, 'hushabye mountain' from the film with the car…she wasn't holding him though, he was sitting with his brothers and they where gently teasing him for needing a lullaby but at the same time their very presence soothed him and they knew it…this had happened when he was eight, he recalled, and he had had a resurgence of night terrors for weeks and on the worst night his family, his real family no matter what the law said, had gathered around him and had as one, made him realise that he didn't need to be afraid, as long as he was in the Mercer house he never needed to be afraid.

He realised he was crying and wiped angrily at his face. "Not in the Mercer house now Jackie boy" he whispered to himself "So be afraid" he whimpered.

He frowned then. "No" he told himself "Fraidy cats never get shit done, they get dead" he hissed. He steeled himself and stood, his legs shaking, and began to look around the room. It was a decent enough room with the bed, the mirror, a cupboard and shelves and a desk, all new looking. The air smelled of the plastic most of the things had come wrapped in and there where Hockey posters on the wall. One was for the Mighty Ducks and Jack, despite his fear, rolled his eyes. He went to the window and stared out at the view. The neighbourhood Amelia lived in was only a step up from Evelyn's, the only real difference being that the lawns where a little neater, and the cars where a little nicer. The houses wheren't bigger, just painted differently. Jack didn't understand why people where calling it a nice neighbourhood. In the dying light of the day it looked like a child's drawing of a street, empty, blank, and unreal.

He checked the windows. They where double glazed which translated as hard to smash and they locked with those sealing locks that had a key and shut out all the noise when you closed them. They had been rigged too, he saw as he tried them, so that they wouldn't open more than a few inches. Jack could see where the small bars had only recently been added to make the windows this way and he guessed all the windows in the house would be the same. He cursed as he pulled at the little bar, hoping it would be shoddy workmanship and would come loose but it was too firmly placed and he realised he would need some kind of tool so made a mental note to find one as soon as possible. He already knew she had all the doors out of the house on one key as she had made a point if telling him as they arrived.

With another sigh, he turned back into the room and walked over to his suitcase. Ma and his brothers had insisted on helping him pack and as he popped the clasps and flipped the lid open, he saw why. On top of his clothes, there was, to start with, an extra large bottle of Jack's favourite bubble bath. Jack smiled sadly and lifted the bottle out, setting it aside. Beside it, there was a large framed photo of Jack with his brothers and Evelyn, all of them red nosed and rosy cheeked after having spent hours in the snow one winter. The next item came directly from Jerry; A copy of Peter Pan, Jack's favourite book. Jack smiled and touched the cover of the book and felt himself grow sad as he remembered Jerry reading it to him and teaching him to him read it himself after a while.

Angel had included a bag of plastic soldiers and a note saying simply 'for protection'. Bobby had left him a knife, a simple little swiss army knife that wouldn't cut butter but it would be comforting weight in his pockets. Jack sat down heavily on the bed, and picked up the photo. He could feel himself starting to tear up again as he stared at the picture. "Ma" he whispered tearfully, touching his hand to the picture.

He looked around the room, swiping at his eyes as the tears began to fall.

He crept over to the door and laid down on the floor, listening through the gap under the door.

He could here what could have been a radio or television, and the thrum of an oven or kitchen fan. Amelia, if she was the only other person in the house and as far as Jack knew she was, was probably in the kitchen. She had given Jack a quick tour of the house when they had first arrived and he knew that the kitchen was near the front of the house, closer to the stairs. He could here the clatter of dishes and plates being moved around as she presumably cooked something. Jack thought for a second, then reached up and unlocked the door to his bed room. No one rushed at him as the lock clicked so he grabbed the handle and twisted it, pulling the door open just a touch. Still no ogres or boogey men came at him so he opened the door enough that he could lean out into the upstairs hall way. He saw that the room Amelia probably owned was directly across from his, the bathroom in between them both. Jack glanced down at the tray of food, nudging it aside with his toe. He wasn't going to eat anything she gave him. He stepped into the hall, hugging the walls to avoid any loose or creaking boards. As he got to the bathroom he peeked in and cursed as he saw that there was no bath, only a shower. "_Bitch_" he muttered.

He glanced toward her bed room but decided it was too much of a risk with her in the house and turned back to ward the room he was being kept in. He wrinkled his nose and looked around the small hallway. There was another room a little further down from Amelia's so, casting another look down at the stairs, Jack crept along the wall toward the room. He got close enough that he could see into the room, which was empty of everything except four walls and a ceiling.

He realised that this room would be right over the kitchen so decided to save checking its windows for another day. With another curse, he snuck back to what he hated to call 'his' room and closed the door again. He walked back to the bed and gathered his gifts from his family. He tore open the bag of soldiers first, counting the soldiers and taking half in his hand. He lined up the soldiers up in front of the door, on their backs so that the sharp edges would face up and hurt the feet of anyone who came through the door.

He looked down at the small throw rug on the floor between the bed and the door. With a sigh of regret, he wrapped his t-shirt around his fist and smashed the glass in the frame of the picture. Pulling back the rug he scattered the glass beneath it, stepping in it to hear a satisfying crunch that would be another deterrent/warning if anyone came into his room.

The knife he tied to a cord around his wrist so that when he walked it dangled down essentially sitting in the curve of his palm. The bubble bath, he kept with him.

It was growing dark out side but Jack didn't turn on the light. Instead, he hugged the bottle of bubble bath to him and tool up his seat under the window, setting up the remaining toy soldier in a linein front of him,staring at the door with watchful eyes.

* * *

It had been two weeks since Jack had been taken away by his aunt. Bobby, Angel and Jerry where bouncing on the balls of their feet as Evelyn dug through her purse and retrieved her keys.

"Ma, seriously" Jerry said pointedly "Like, now!" he told her.

"Alright alright!" Evelyn walked to the bottom of the stairs "Diane we're leaving, there's sandwiches in the fridge and we'll bring back take out" she yelled.

"Alright Evie, give Jackie our love, tell him I want him to send me some sketches" Diane appeared at the top of the stairs and yelled down.

"I will, see you later guys" Evelyn called.

The boys where already standing beside the car as Evelyn ran out to them unlocked the doors. They piled in, quietly, instead of bickering over the seating arrangements like they normally did. Evelyn pulled the car into the street and began to drive, flicking the radio on to fill the silence.

They drove for at least half an hour before they pulled in to the parking lot of a diner and Evelyn barely had time to park before the boys flew from the car and ran to the door of the diner. Evelyn locked the car and ran after them as they entered.

The four of them hesitated at the door and until some one yelled '"MA!" in a voice heavy with emotion and relief.

Evelyn pushed through the boys and saw Jack at a booth at the other end of the counter. He pushed out past Amelia and ran the full length of the diner.

"Jack!" Evelyn sobbed as she dropped into a crouch and scooped Jack up into a hug, the sound of the diner and its patrons fading away, everything melting away until all she was aware of was Jack in her arms and her boys at her back.

"Oh Jackie" She whispered, feeling his arms squeezing around her "Oh my baby I missed you" she told him.

Jack said nothing but she could feel him crying in her arms as she squeezed him as hard as she dared. He felt fragile to her, scrawny, and she realised with a start that she could feel the lumps of his spine through his jacket.

She held him in her arms but drew back from him so that she could see his face. He was pale, his cheeks hollow, his eyes sunken, shadowed and with bags beneath them. "Jackie" she barely had time to breath before Bobby reached around her and pulled Jack into a bear hug, the smaller boy almost disappearing in the folds of Bobby's thick winter coat.

Jerry and Angel crowded around them and joined the hug, the four of them blocking up the aisle of the diner and not giving a shit.

Evelyn turned back to see Amelia, an uncomfortable look on her face, walking toward them.

"He is starving" Evelyn hissed raggedly.

"He wont eat the food I give him, he eats the lunch he gets at school and that's it all day its not my fault" Amelia spat back angrily.

Evelyn scoffed and turned back to her sons. Bobby had reluctantly set Jack down on the ground and was crouching in front of him, examining him.

Jerry was looking at Jack's hand "Damn man, you been biting your nails?" he asked.

"Look at your face Jackie, you been eatin?" Bobby frowned, holding Jacks face in one hand.

"What you been doing to him!" Angel snapped at Amelia.

She sighed "Like I told your mother, he wont eat the food I give him" she shot back.

"She might put stuff in it, like my dad did" Jack whispered to his brothers by way of explanation.

"Why would I do that Jack!" she asked, exasperated.

Ignoring her, he leaned closer to the boys "She rigged the windows so I cant get out" he told them.

"Shall we sit down?" Evelyn said diplomatically.

Amelia rolled her eyes as she nodded and headed back to the booth she had come from. The Mercers followed her and sat in the booth, the four boys all trying to fit into the same side as Evelyn.

Reluctantly, Angel and Bobby sat beside Amelia as the waitress came over to take their drinks orders.

When she was gone, Evelyn turned in her seat to look at Jack. "Did you get taller?" she asked him.

"I don't know" he answered quietly.

"How's it been kid?" Bobby asked.

Jack shot a glare at Amelia "She doesn't have a bath" he told them "so no bubbles"

"The house came like that when I moved in" Amelia told them.

"Have you had _any_ sleep?" Angel frowned as he leaned forward.

"How can I sleep knowing what she might do!" Jack snapped irritably.

"Jack, I'm not going to do anything to you, I would never hurt you like that" Amelia sighed.

Evelyn, although she hated it, could see that Amelia was stressed and felt the faintest twinge of guilt for her. "Jack I'm sure it would be okay for you to sleep. And I don't like that you're not eating and that's not anybodies choice but your own" she scolded him gently "If you really think Amelia would do something to your food, why don't you just watch her make it, that way you can see if she's making you a turkey sandwich or a rat poison sandwich" she suggested.

Amelia gave her a look of gratitude as Jack grudgingly nodded.

The waitress returned with their drinks and they ordered their food, Jack ordering the largest meal of them all, unsurprisingly.

They made idle, forced chatter until the food came and it wasn't until they saw Jack begin to wolf down his meal that the other boys started on theirs "hey, close your mouths and breath between bites" Evelyn admonished them all.

"So Jackie boy what's you're new school like?" Bobby asked.

"S'good, I joined the hockey team" Jack told them "and this kid hassled me the first few days there" he took a sip of his milkshake.

"What'd you do?" Angel frowned.

"I pounded him into the ground" Jack shrugged and grinned at them.

"Atta boy Jackie" Jerry laughed "sew the Mercer reputation far and wide" he nodded.

"His last name is not Mercer" Amelia told them.

The four boys gave her identical 'whatever' looks and carried on with their conversation as if she hadn't spoken.

"What's the hockey team like?" Angel asked.

"It sucks. Even for ten year olds it sucks. And they're all little fairies who go bitchin to the coach if you slam em too hard" Jack frowned.

"I guess it takes a fairy to know a fairy huh Jackie boy?" Bobby teased.

Jack snickered and threw a fry at Bobby "If I'm a fairy its cos I copy how you are" he shot back.

"Ma did you hear that!" Bobby turned to Evelyn.

"I did. And he has a point" Evelyn joked.

Bobby gasped theatrically and began bickering with his brothers as Jack giggled and showed more life than he had in weeks. Evelyn joined in the mock fight and took Jack's side in the 'rivalry'. As the family, and that's what it was, continued their games, Amelia sat to one side, excluded, ignored, staring at them with angry eyes.

* * *

"Four hours!" Ameliaheld upa cigarette and let Vern light it for her with the lighter she had given him for Christmas "They all took their damn time eating their meals, then hemmed and hawed over dessert for almost forty minutes, I swear Vern they went through every option on that menu and discussed the pro's and con's of every single one before they ordered, then when they _had_ ordered they all changed their minds half way through and ordered totally new stuff, and then, the quiet one, Terry or Jerry, well I saw him watching the pie tray, he waited until it was empty, then re-re ordered and asked for a slice of pie and when the waitress told him it would be at least half an hour he told her that was fine and they all decided they could wait half an hour for their own desserts so that he wouldn't be eating his alone and that the waitress could hold all the orders until then. And they took their time eating the desserts too, I've never seen anybody make banana split last so long. And then they all just _kept _ordering coffee!" She took a long drag on the cigarette, her face tense and angry "And Evelyn, was content to let them get away with it so in the end I just said I had things to do and I took Jack and I left" she sighed.

"And how is the kid?" Vern asked, pouring Amelia a mug of green tea.

"Well he's up in his room right now, naturally of course. Probably plotting to kill me in my bed" she snarked "He wont talk to me, he wont eat the food I make him, he barely even looks at me" she admitted.

"Remind me again why you wanted him?" Vern lit his own cigarette.

"I…when I found out what John had done to him, I couldn't believe my own flesh and blood could do something so awful" she confessed "So I wanted to show this kid that our family wasn't all bad"

"But?" Vern made it a question.

"But now I'm beginning to think it might have been a bad idea…I'm still dreading one of these…attacks of his…and he clearly hates me, and to be honest…some times I just want to…" she made claws with her hands and grimaced "Just smack him or something you know? And I feel awful because he hasn't done a damn thing to deserve it but at the same time I think, I'd feel so much better if I could take my frustrations about him out _on him_" she pointed to her cigarette "I mean look at this? I haven't had a smoke in almost two years!"

Vern ran a hand through his dark hair "Well since vices are on the menu tonight and you want to unwind…why not have a couple glasses of wine?" he suggested.

Amelia fixed him with a glare "Vern I worked hard to get clean" she stated.

"Look, this kid stresses you out right?" Vern leaned forward slightly "The only way to unwind that stress is to either give him back, or beat the shit out of him. If you do the first, that fucked up family wins. If you do the second, that fucked up family wins and you become one of the things you hate" he had been counting off on his fingers as he spoke, and now he held one up "So then we create option number three…get to a place where he doesn't bother you any more, zone out" he shrugged as if it was the obvious answer.

Amelia stared at nothing as she thought it over "Wine wouldn't do it, my tolerance is too high" she said quietly.

Vern smiled and shook his head "I can compensate for that" he stated, reaching into his jacket pocket.

He retrieved what looked like a diabetics portable injection kit and lay it down on the table. In a slow, deliberate movement, he unzipped the wallet looking kit and pulled out a syringe, and a small baggie filled with white powder. He leant back in his chair as Amelia, her eyes wide, drew ferociously on the cigarette, staring at the baggie.

"No pressure. You don't want it, I'll take it away and never mention it again" He said.

Amelia rubbed unconsciously at her own cotton covered arms. In a tiny voice she whispered "Take it away" and nodding wordlessly, Vern packed the kit away and put it back in his pocket.

He sipped the coffee he had brewed for himself and took a deep breath, seeming to shake off the previous five minutes as he breathed out "So how's work been?" he asked casually.

"Uh…good. Fine" Amelia nodded "This new book I have to proof read is pretty good, sad though" she took another hit from her cigarette "It wouldn't even need to be a lot because I've been off it so long right? I mean its not like I'm going back on it, I just need to mellow out then from tomorrow I can make the real effort, get this damn kid to like me…hell maybe I can ask for a raise and get him that bath tub he wants" she spoke very quickly, "I'd only need one hit tonight and then I'll be fine tomorrow" she smirked.

Vern nodded and retrieved the kit again "You're sure?" he asked even as Amelia peeled off her fitted sweater and held out her arm.

"Yeah, It's just for tonight, why wouldn't I be sure?" she smiled confidently.

Vern pulled off his belt and looped it around her arm to make a vein rise. And Amelia smiled to her self "It'll help, in the long run, cause I'll be able to think more clearly when I mellow out a little, I cant think when I'm wound up like this and that kid winds me up, so I'll just mellow out, that's all I need to do"


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter six peoples.

DISCLAIMER: This chapter contains graphic descriptions of violence against children, drug use, and swearing. But again, lots of violence and one scene that was really hard to write but i felt it neccassary for the story.

I dont own any of the Mercers but if i did i would wrap Jack in cotton wool to protect him from the evils of the world and from my imagination.

Oh and btw, my reviewers, all of you...i've been having a bit of an emotional week of late, getting upset over some personal things in my life andyour reviews, genuinely, brighten up my whole day, some make me get teary eyed, some make me grin like aloon, some make me laugh out loud. Y'all cant even know the affect you're having on me, thank you thank you thank you.xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

So R+R

PS: dont hate me for doing this to Jack.

* * *

Jack was lying on the floor of his room, listening at the door. Something was different, wrong, in the house.

Normally by this point, Amelia had knocked on his door asking him to come down to dinner, but he hadn't heard anything from her since the arrival of some one new several hours before. Jack flicked his hand a little, swinging the pen knife into his palm. He unlocked the door quietly and stepped out into the hallway. There was a cold feel to the house. Usually, there was some kind of noise, music, or the oven running, but Jack couldn't hear anything, and if not for the fact that he knew no cars had left, he would almost say he was alone in the house.

He heard a thump and tensed involuntarily, but no sound followed so he hesitantly stepped towards the top of the stairs. He listened carefully, hoping he would hear something that would give him some idea of what was going on. There was a sound like some one moving around, and what could have been a faint laugh, but nothing else. Jack snuck down the stairs, leaning forward to see if he could see anything. There was a jacket on the hook by the door. Jack didn't recognise it, and as he leaned close to examine it he caught a whiff of cigarette smoke and alcohol. The smell conjured up terrifying memories and Jack stepped back away from it hurriedly.

He edged toward the kitchen and heard another thump, this one followed by a slow dragging sound and he felt the fear he was fighting to repress flowed up through him in an unstoppable wave. He bit his own lip hard enough that he broke the skin and took another step forward. Slowly, agonizingly slowly, he made it to the kitchen door. He knelt and listened under the door. Amelia was laughing quietly, lethargically as a male, presumably the owner of the jacket, rumbled something in a bass voice that Jack felt in his chest more than heard.

There was a rank, acrid smell coming from the kitchen that Jack vaguely recognised but couldn't name and he headed toward the back of the house, the dining room, so he could use the other entrance to the kitchen to get a better idea of what was happening.

He snuck through the house, through the dining room and crouched beside the arch shaped entrance to the kitchen. He peered in. Amelia was sort of, sprawled in her chair, her legs stretched out in front of her, her back bent awkwardly so she almost lay in the seat of the chair. She had a belt looped tightly around one arm.

The guy, Jack didn't know his name, was sitting across from her in a similar position, sliding his feet slowly on the floor, making the dragging sound that Jack kept hearing. He was nodding his head slowly as if he was tired and Jack could just make out some kind of…something on the table. He frowned, squinted, but he couldn't make it out. "You're right Vern" Amelia said, giving the bog man a name "I...I needed this, I needed to relax" her voice was slow, heavy, and with a churn of fear, Jack recognised the slurring of inebriation in her voice. He suppressed a whimper and crawled backwards through the dining room. He snuck back out into the hall and headed for the back door if the house, but found it locked with a heavy duty security lock that he wouldn't be able to pick. He crept to the front, but the house was essentially sealed. Jack cast around for a phone before he realised the only phone was in the kitchen.

He felt the tears, the fear well up and clenched his teeth in frustration. He crept back up the stairs and into his room, resetting his traps and pulling the blade out on the pen knife. Jack began to weep but fought to hold it together as he took up his usual spot beneath the window, hiccoughing as he tried to quiet his own crying.

* * *

Angel was staring at the phone, his eyes troubled, his face creased into a frown.

"What's the matter?" Diane asked, walking into the kitchen.

"Amelia promised Jack he could phone us…he hasn't yet" he told her.

"It's been what, four days since you had lunch?" Diane asked, not condescendingly, just genuinely curious.

"Three as of this morning…I mean when he didn't phone us that day it was odd but this…there's something wrong" he Angel gave her a worried look.

Diane chewed her lip, her face sympathetic. "So what, you three are on shifts?" she asked.

"Yeah…I watch the phone and do my work, while Bobby and Jerry do…homework, what ever they need to do, then we switch…" Angel shrugged.

"How long have you been there?" Diane, who wore simple cotton pyjamas, stood beside the fridge.

"I don't know, a few hours…Jerry has some huge presentation to prepare and Bobby's…dealin with some business stuff" Angel rubbed his eyes.

"You want a sandwich?" Diane asked brightly, despite the late hour.

Angel looked over at her, his face breaking into a weak, grateful smile "That would be great…actually why am I making you do it, I'm in here, I can make it" he moved to slide off his stool.

Diane held a hand up "No I can, I'm making myself one anyway, plus I've seen how you make sandwiches" she snickered.

"You got something to say!" Angel asked mock aggressively.

"Yeah, your sandwiches look like you made the thing then put a grenade in it" Diane laughed.

Angel grinned at her and nodded "That is, unfortunately, very true" he admitted.

He slid off his stool any way and stretched his legs, pushing his chest and stomach out until something in his back popped and he groaned in appreciation.

"What's that?" Diane nodded toward the open notebook and dog eared novel Angel had on the counter in front of him.

"Uh, Miss Harrison's English homework" he rubbed his eyes again, fetching both himself and Diane a soda from the fridge as Diane began to make the sandwiches.

"Oh Damn" Diane muttered "Oh well, I wasn't really planning on sleeping tonight any way" she shrugged.

"It's not that bad once you get into it" Angel assured her.

"Lord of the flies though…I kind of like the idea behind it…no parents" Diane said, her voice just a little sad.

Angel gave a tiny nod "If you have the wrong kind of parents, yeah" he agreed "But we got Ma" he said simply.

"You're lucky…you know, I haven't been here that long but I already feel like what ever it is she does is working" Diane told him.

"Yeah it kinda sneaks up on you" Angel chuckled, looking anxiously at the still silent phone.

"Hey, he'll call" Diane said, noticing the look "Let me ask you some thing, and I'm not bitching you out, I'm just curious" She dug a bag of potato chips and shook a share of chips out onto both their plates "Evelyn makes it her life's mission to…help kids, save them, from their parents, from themselves…I mean she's famous for straightening out some of the worst juvenile delinquents in Detroit" she set Angels plate down beside his books and took a seat across from him. "But you three…even Jerry…hell, you _four_, cause I'm gonna include Jack…you still get into trouble, you steal and fight and get arrested…why?" she frowned, and as she had promised, her tone was not judgemental, but genuinely curious.

Angel shook his head "Well…okay…I'm not saying you didn't have it hard because I know you did but like, you're mom and dad, as shitty as it was for them to abandon you, they where other wise nice, honest people right?" Angel asked.

Diane thought about it then nodded "Yeah, they where bastards but they didn't break the law" she admitted.

"Well, our parents did. Jerry's mama was a ho' he didn't know his dad cause the guy was one of his mom's customers…Jerry learned when he was three that sometimes stealin shit was the only way he was gonna get fed, ya know? I mean his mama was at heart a good person, she never exposed him to like, her johns, never put him in danger but he had to steal and fight to survive and her learned it's the easiest way sometimes. My dad was the same, he was a hustler, I do it know" Angel told her.

"A hustler?" Diane frowned.

"A pool shark…amongst other things….basically I fake out like I suck at pool, or basketball or hockey, con some one into letting me in a game for money, so the other guys think they're playin against some loser and are gonna walk away cash in hand, then as I play I just…get lucky" he raised his eyebrows at her.

"Does it work?" Diane asked, impressed.

"Shit yeah" he smiled "My dad taught me to hustle when I was…six or seven…I was turning over a hell of a profit. But he was pretty violent too, that's how come they took me away" he took a bite of the sandwich, thanking Diane with his mouth full "And Bobby…Bobby had it real hard…his mom and dad where fucking ass holes…he had to steal and shake kids down and kick ass just to stay alive….now its like, what he's used to…its all he knows…and we all got a lot of, anger issues" he said.

"That's putting it lightly" Diane raised an eyebrow.

"We don't do it to spite Ma…its just how we get shit done" he shrugged again.

Diane nodded "Fair enough. I was just wondering is all" she smiled.

"How about you? You think Ma's help will last?" he asked her.

"I'd like to say yes…but I'm not sure…I mean, I have my problems, the drinking mainly…but since my first few weeks here, I haven't had a drink, and I haven't wanted too…its sort of like, when you're living here, you're in this bubble, and its so easy to behave, and to feel safe…I'm just worried that when I leave the house, I'll leave that protective bubble and I'll be tempted again" she wrinkled her nose "if that makes sense" she gave Angel an apologetic look.

Angel gave her a small smile and a nod "That's why we're so worried about Jack…when he's in the house we feel like he's just one of us, but now with him being…out in the real world I guess…we feel like he's made out of crystal, and the slightest knock could shatter him. When he's here we can protect him, Ma can protect him…out there…he's all alone" he cut off suddenly, hearing a yell from upstairs.

"Stay by the phone?" he asked, and Diane nodded.

Angel ran up the stairs and saw Bobby looming over Li, his face twisted into an angry snarl "I'm telling you right now kid, you go in that room and I'll kick your ass" Bobby yelled into Li's face.

"He's not coming back, I'm sick of being in the attic, I'm claiming his room!" Li yelled back.

Bobby raised his fist to hit Li but Angel rushed forward and grabbed Bobby, pulling him backwards "What the hell!" he asked of them both.

"This little shit was in Jack's room, he seems to think he has some right to it!" Bobby snapped.

"He's. Not. Here" Li said slowly.

Bobby went for him again and Angel only just held his brother back. "Li, the rooms off limits" Angel told Li, his back to the boy as he wrangled with Bobby.

"Why!" Li growled and Angel rounded on him.

"Because I said so you little shit now fuck off" he hissed.

Li balked and stormed off, yelping as Bobby took a swipe at him as he passed.

Bobby silently fumed but let Angel escort him down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Everything alright?" Diane asked nervously, eyeing the walking volcano that was Bobby.

"Yeah, just stuff about Jack's room" Angel muttered, slumping into his seat.

"Anything I can do?" Diane asked.

"Maybe go talk to Li?" Angel asked "He cant have Jack's room, that's final, but Bobby might have roughed him up a little, and I snapped at him" he explained.

Diane, who had finished her sandwich, took a bag of marshmallows from the cupboard and went upstairs.

"Ma will be back soon" Angel observed.

"Angel this aint right, he aint called" Bobby said, his anger seeming to drain out of him all of a sudden.

"I know man…maybe…maybe he's out or something she might be taking him to…the park" Angel lied to reassure himself as well as Bobby.

"No. I have a bad feeling" Bobby shook his head, "I want Maria to call around at the house, or give us the address so we can go over" he stated.

"Right. Then maybe she can give us a million dollars each" Angel scoffed.

"I'm serious Angel" Bobby turned to face him.

"So am I" Angel stated "Maria wouldn't give you that address any more than she would give you her house keys and a list of all her valuables" he raised an eyebrow.

"Well if she wont let _us_ check it out, she can do it" Bobby shrugged.

"She did the two week check the day before we had lunch with them" Jerry sighed as he walked into the room "She wont do one again without a reason too"

"She has a reason!" Bobby snapped "No ones heard from him!"

"_We_ haven't heard from him. Bobby I hate this as much as you do but for all we know Maria sees them every day. She has no reason to think anything is wrong"

* * *

Jack was shaking violently as he stood in the den in Amelia's house. There where half a dozen people sitting around, slouching on the sofa's, in the armchairs, some even just laying on the floor. Amelia was laying on her stomach on the second sofa, mumbling incoherently in her drugged up state. It had been like this for days. Hours after Jack had first discovered Amelia getting high with her junkie dealer boyfriend, the other people had begun arriving and had been at the house, and using, ever since. Every now and then one of them would get up and staggeringly get more food, or more drugs. Jack had been watching from up stairs. He hadn't eaten in several days. He hadn't left the house; he wasn't yet a regular face in his new school, so he kne he hadn't been missed. He hadn't dared take a shower and he knew he smelled bad but he couldn't work up enough emotion that wasn't fear to care. He had ventured downstairs after several hours of silence and stumbled upon the mess that was the den. Jack was so scared he thought he might pee in his pants but he didn't, he simply began to back up, heading for the kitchen. For the phone. He wasn't as alert as he had been in the past, his fear, rarely, clouding his judgement.

He didn't check before he walked into the kitchen and saw Vern sitting at the table, counting out baggies of what Jack could guess, was heroin.

"Hi there" Vern said, his voice actually friendly "you must be Jack" he smiled at Jack and Jack was reminded of a shark he had seen in a movie once.

Jack stared open mouthed and tried to think of a way to escape. "Amelia tells me you're a little nervous around new people" Vern carefully turned in his chair, holding his hands out to show Jack they where empty.

Jack's mind went into survival mode as his fear all but overrode his cognitive functions. He found he could see more of the kitchen, see the knives in the block on the counter, see the doorway to the dining room. In his head he could map out the exact route he would need to take to get from where he stood, either by backtracking and booking for the stairs, or by trying to go past Vern.

"Well listen Jack, I'm not a stranger, I'm a very good friend of your aunt Amelia's" Vern stated.

"You're giving her drugs" Jack whispered hoarsely.

Vern nodded slowly "I'm helping her calm down…like a psychiatrist would" he 'corrected'.

"No" Jack shook his head.

"Hey, she didn't have to take the stuff I gave her kid, I gave her a choice" Vern shrugged "Now why don't you come here" he said, and something in his tone made the fear Jack was barely controlling redouble its efforts to over power him.

If he had had anything in his stomach we would have been sick.

"What?" his voice came out in a strangled choke.

"Come here. Let me see you better" Vern gave that shark smile again and licked his lips.

"Fuck you" Jack hissed.

Vern tilted his head to one side and raised his eyebrows. He rose from his chair and Jack bolted back through the door, hearing Vern yell after him. He ran up the stairs and into his room, slamming the door closed as he heard Vern thumping up the stairs behind him. He locked the door and moved around to the side of the desk, pushing as hard as he could. The effort left him dizzy but he moved the desk in front of the door as Vern began pounding on the door, yelling to be let in.

Jack picked up his chair and ran to the window, swinging the chair as hard as he could. The glass pane shattered, but didn't break, and Jack swung again, screaming with the effort as Vern hammered on the door. Once again, the glass cracked, so Jack dumped the chair and simply began punching at the window, ignoring the pain as the glass cut his hands. He heard a cracking sound behind him and spared a glance at the door, whimpering as he saw the wood around the lock beginning to break under Vern's efforts.

There was a solid sounding thump and the lock gave. The door opened and the desk slid forward a few inches. With jerks and shoved, the door began to slide open and Jack, his hands shaking, folded out the blade from his pen knife and crawled under the bed as Vern walked into the room.

Jack listened intently as Vern's heavy boots stomped across the hard wood floor, and when it sounded like Vern was standing near the window, Jack crawled out on the other side, near the door, and made a run for it. Vern simply ran over the bed, landing beside Jack, his long legs carrying him to the door in two easy strides. He stood between Jack and the door. Jack pulled up short and the knife fell from his hand, clattering to the floor.

"Now like I said" Vern took a step toward Jack, peeling off his own jacket and pushing the door closed behind him "Let me get a look at you"

* * *

"Maria please!" Bobby was yelling into the phone "Just go over there, do one of those….spot checks! Make sure he's okay, with your own eyes!" he pleaded.

Evelyn, having just gotten back home from visiting with an elderly, invalid neighbour, walked into the question, shooting questioning glances at Jerry and Angel.

"We haven't heard from Jack yet and we got a bad feeling" Angel said by way of explanation.

Evelyn gave a curt nod and took the phone from Bobby's hand "Maria, its Evelyn…yeah, we're just worried, could you please just run over there and check up on them?" she asked kindly.

There was a pause "Thank you" Evelyn smiled "You'll get them to call? That's great…I'm sure everything's fine, we just want to be sure" she said into the phone.

She hung up the phone and looked around at the boys "Okay? She'll take a while to get there because she has other kids to deal with first bur she will go. Alright?" she asked.

"Thanks Ma" The boys said in unison.

She pulled the three of them into a hug "I'm worried too but you have to be more diplomatic about this stuff…plus if we pester her too often Amelia might decide we can never visit with Jack" she squeezed them then released them "We just need to know when to back off"

* * *

Amelia raised her head groggily as she heard Vern yelling and a noise she could only describe as a shriek.

She rolled off the couch and struggled to her feet, waiting for her head to clear for a second before she walked toward the stairs. Vern was storming down them, dragging Jack by the arm, shaking the boy roughly. He literally tossed Jack into the corner like an old sack as Amelia held up her hands "Whoah, what the fuck is going on!" She snapped angrily.

"That little bastard stabbed me!" Vern spat.

Amelia looked at the small wound on Vern's arm, the over at Jack who had pulled himself up to a sitting position and was huddled in the corner, one hand hugging his knees, the other holding the pen knife out in front of him, the blade wavering through the air. Jack was visibly shaking and his eyes had gone wide and blank. He was staring into space and Amelia bet whatever he was seeing wasn't in the room with him.

"Did you do something to him?" Amelia frowned.

Vern ignored the question and shoved past her, taking a step toward Jack.

Jack, while seeming some what unaware of his surroundings, reacted instantly, scrambling to his feet even as he spat blood and ran into the kitchen. Amelia and Vern followed in time to see Jack grabbing a larger knife from the block on the counter.

"Aw shit!" Amelia growled, "Vern get him!" she snapped.

Vern rushed Jack and Jack grabbed a plate from old ones on the table and threw it at Vern. Vern cursed as the plate smashed at his feet and Jack gave a screaming growl as he backed away from Vern.

Amelia went around the other side of the table but Jack spotted her and began yelling at the top of his lungs, screaming and shouting incoherently.

Amelia ducked toward him and he swung the knife at her, turning his body to do so, giving Vern the opportunity to swoop in behind him and scoop him up, grabbing the hand Jack held the knife in and squeezing it until Jack let go. Jack, as Vern had grabbed him had begun screaming at an even higher pitch than Amelia would have thought possible and he fought like a demon, kicking his legs, twisting his back, even reaching backwards in a way that had to be painful, to claw at Vern's face. Vern twisted Jack and slammed him down on top of the table, clamping one hand over Jack's mouth. It muffled the noise somewhat but not much, and Jack still fought as Vern tried to hold him still.

Some of Amelia's junkie friends had been stirred from their stupor by the commotion and stood in the door way, bleary eyed and pissed "What the fuck!" one of them asked "Cant you shut him up!"

Amelia ran a hand through her greasy her "That old bitch talked to him at her place" she told them.

"So do that" Vern growled "Hey, a little help!" he glared at one of the junkies, a blonde man.

"What do you want me to do?" the guy asked, stepping forward.

Amelia leaned over Jack "Hush now Jackie boy" she whispered.

Jack redoubled his efforts, his eyes murderous over Vern's hand.

"Rex help me!" Vern barked and the blond junkie reached out and took Jack's arms, holding them together over Jack's chest as Vern kept one hand on Jack's mouth and pressed the other over Jack's stomach, trying to stop Jack from arching his back and twisting around.

"Cant you give him like…a pill" the other junkie, a crew cutted woman asked.

"Hey can we give him a hit?" Amelia asked Vern.

Vern nodded "do it" he snarled.

Amelia found the paraphernalia to make up a needle and got to it, preparing the shot as quickly as she could while Rex and Vern struggled to hold Jack.

"How much should I give him?" she called out.

"How the fuck should I know? Enough to put him asleep…the same as _you _would take to get buzzed" Vern guessed.

Amelia nodded and prepped the needle, flicking it to dispel any air bubbles.

Vern used one hand to simple tear away part of Jack's sleeve.

Jack saw Amelia with the needle and even behind Vern' hand, his scream was uncomfortably loud. Vern yelped and pulled his hand away from Jack's mouth with some difficulty as Jack had taken a bite out of Vern's palm. Vern smacked Jack across the face, but Jack's adrenaline was pumping too much and he seemed to barely feel the hit. He screamed curses at Amelia as Vern clamped his hand over Jack's mouth once again, using his other hand to squeeze Jack's arm to raise a vein.

Amelia pulled his arm toward her and slapped it a little. Jack's eyes where wide as he shrieked behind Vern's hand and Amelia stuck the needle into his vein, depressing the plunger.

The effect was almost instantaneous. Jack's eyes widened again, then fluttered. His screaming ceased almost instantly and he slumped on the table and his eyes grew blank, half closed, fixed unseeingly on Amelia's face. Vern released his hold on Jack and quickly lit a cigarette, chuckling cruelly as Rex raised Jack's limp hand and dropped it again.

"That did it" Vern snickered.

"Little fucker is wasted" Rex leaned close to Jack's face as Jack took slow, shallow breaths.

"You think it was too much?" Amelia asked, prepping herself another hit.

"No, he's just riding the high" Vern shook his head "Hey watch" he puffed on his cigarette until the end glowed red then pressed the tip to the skin on Jack's arm.

Jack didn't even blink as his skin burned.

"Shit!" Rex laughed, pinching Jack's arm hard enough to leave a bruise.

Amelia ignored them as they burned and pinched the limp boy, concentrating on her own hit. "I wanna go back in the den" she told Vern as Vern used Jack's own small knife to make cuts on the back of Jack's hand.

"Fix me one" Vern nodded to the needle she was preparing.

"Fix your fucking own" Amelia sneered.

She put a cap on the syringe and stuck it in her pocket as Rex and Vern began to make up more needles.

Amelia leaned over Jack's near lifeless form. His skin had gone grey and his lips where an odd shade of blue. She slapped his face hard enough to leave a red handprint.

"hey, fucker?" she shouted into his face. She chuckled "You're so fucked up! Hey, what would you say if I said…lemme see….oh, if I said I was gonna send you back to your dad!" she snickered cruelly, slapping him again.

"Amelia come one already" Vern snapped, carrying many of the baggies out of the kitchen "You probably gave him too much you know, kid weighs less than a fucking fart, he's probably ODing" Vern yelled back.

Amelia picked up Jack's arm and shook it so his hand dangled lifelessly. She slammed his arm down hard on the edge of the table and felt one of the bones under her hand snap. Jack simply wheezed for breath. Amelia rolled her eyes and walked out of the kitchen, heading back to the den, leaving Jack alone in the kitchen.

He took another slow breath and managed to twitch his head, blinking once, twice.

Some echo of adrenalin, some driving force over came the pain, the weakness in his body, and Jack managed to slide off the table. He was fading fast, he could feel it with every beat of his heart but he had a mission. The utter determination enabled him to reach the phone on the wall. Ordinarily it was less than two feet from the table, but on this day, some one had moved it an eternity away and Jack had to slump, zombie like toward it. When he got to it, he found one of his hands wouldn't work and used the other one to lift the phone off the cradle and drop it to the ground. He used the same hand to dial a number then simply lay down on the ground, his head resting near the phone.

The ringing tone seemed to go on forever and Jack felt his tenuous grip slipping as the tugging darkness began to pull him under. There was a click and a voice answered "Evelyn Mercer speaking?"

"Ma" Jack whispered silently.

"Hello? Who's there?" Evelyn was saying.

"Ma!" Jack tried again.

"If some ones there can you let me know? Hello?" Evelyn, sounding worried, said.

"Ma…Ma…Ma" Jack repeated the word, his voice growing just a little stronger with each attempt "Ma…ma…mom…mom…mommy, mommy" Jack gasped "mommy"

"Jack!" Evelyn yelled into the phone, her voice high with alarm and fear "oh god, Jackie, Maria's on her way, she'll be there soon, hold on baby" Evelyn's voice grew thick with emotion and Jack could faintly hear voices in the background beginning to yell as Evelyn spoke into the phone "Mommy's here baby, talk to me, talk to me Jackie, I'm here, keep talking to me, don't stop talking to me" Evelyn was screaming into the phone now.

Jack felt the blackness win and as he slid into the dark he gasped once more

"Mommy"


	7. Chapter 7

At Last!For some reason it's been IMPOSSIBLE to load this, but its all good now!And this chapter is also delayed by the bane of any wirters existence the dreaded Block!

Disclaimers apply as is the norm and again, thanks to all my reviewers, sorry its taken so long, thanks for being patient with me while i came this '' close to throwing my laptop out of the window and becoming a hermit!

Thanks for people saying they hoped i feel better too, thats so sweet of you all!

I'll try to post the next part as soon as i can, i hated that this took so long to get posted!So R+R!

* * *

Carl had been a paramedic for twelve years and he'd seem some pretty awful stuff, but of everything he had seen, of the bloody, mangled bodies of car crash victims, the blackened curled skin of people stuck in fires, even of the grasping, scratched from fighting hands of teen rape victims of all of that he knew, from the second he walked into the house of Amelia Keenan that what he saw in there would be one of the ones to haunt him.

A dark haired woman was kneeling beside the motionless body of a small boy, sobbing and wailing as she tried to perform CPR.

The boys skin was greyish white, his lips where blue, and a layer of sweat covered his skin. There where bruises and cuts on his hands and face, all of them obviously recent, some that even looked like uniform slices. The woman was screaming at them to help as Carl and his partner Alice ran to the boy's side.

"What happened?" Carl asked the woman, gently but firmly pushing her aside.

"Oh God…I…I think they gave him heroin!" the woman wept, "He's only ten years old" she told them.

Carl felt sick as Alice lifted the boys hand and let it drop lifelessly "No reflexive response" she told him.

"What's his name?" Carl asked the woman.

"Jack" the woman cried.

As Alice leaned into Jack's face to yell his name, trying to wake him up, Carl looked around the wrecked kitchen "Is any one else in the house hurt?" he asked the sobbing woman.

"There's a bunch of people in the den getting high" the woman managed to put a lot of anger behind the words "I called the cops already"

"I have a pulse but it's threadie as hell" Alice told him "We gotta get him in" she rose to get the stretcher.

"Ma'am, what's your name?" Carl asked as he placed a mask over Jack's mouth and nose and began squeezing the bag to give him more oxygen.

"I'm Maria" she seemed to be gaining control of herself "I'm his social worker, I was asked to stop by and check on him and I found him like this" she explained as Alice returned with the stretcher.

There was a whoop and the red and blue of police sirens flashed in the windows.

Alice and Carl carefully loaded Jack onto the stretcher "I radioed for another rig for the people in there, one or two of look like they might be ODing" Alice told Carl as two officers jogged into the house.

"Whaddya got?" one of the officers asked.

"Ten year old male suspected heroin overdose" Carl told him.

"Jesus" the cop asked.

"Signs of abuse too, you might want to talk to the partiers in the den" Alice spat angrily, hurriedly taping gauze onto the worst of Jack's wounds.

"Son of a bitch" the other cop snarled, reaching for his cuffs as he stormed into the den.

"We'll get him to the hospital, there's another rig en route, some of them in there don't look too good" Alice explained as she and Carl ran past the cop and out to their own ambulance.

Maria climbed in the back after them and the ambulance sped off, leaving the cops at the scene.

One of them walked into the now empty kitchen and surveyed the mess. He heard an oddly scratchy noise, like the sound of a spider in a matchbox.

He walked over to where the boy had been lying and crouched beside the phone which still lay on the ground. The noise was coming from the phone and as he got closer he realised that it was a voice on the other end. Without touching the phone he leaned close enough to hear better heard a woman, shrieking into the phone, begging to be told what was going on.

* * *

Bobby and his brothers stared through the observation at Jack, who, as he had for the last four days, lay motionless in the hospital bed, a tube in his throat helping him to breath as his body wasn't strong enough to do it alone. Evelyn was curled up on a seat in the room, her eyes half closed, although she would never sleep as long as Jack was still potentially ill.

Jack was almost as white as the sheets he lay on, his eyes dark and heavily shadowed. His lips where dry and cracked where the tube had rubbed them, his head had been wrapped in a bandage after x-rays had shown a fracture to the back of his skull. His broken arm was encased in a thick plaster cast, his other wounds cleaned and bandaged. His chest seemed unnaturally bulky, due to the layer of bandages wrapped around his ribs, several of which had been broken. One had punctured a lung and caused, according to the doctors, permanent scarring to the organ. There was a good chance Jack would need to use an inhaler sometimes, when he came out of the hospital. He had yet to wake up, and for several hours, the day before, the doctors had been talking about the possibility of permanent damage to his system.

"There should be doctors in there with him right now, they should be fixing him" Bobby muttered wearily.

"You heard what they said man, its up to him to wake up" Jerry said in the tone of some one who had said the words before.

"But there's got to be more they can be doing, right? I mean he's just a little kid and they're expecting him to get over all of this without any help" Angel asked.

"Look at all that stuff they got him hooked up to, that's gotta be helping him some" Jerry pointed out.

"I'm gonna kill that bitch" Bobby said quietly.

"I heard they got her in a room down stairs 'cause she OD'd herself when she was poisoning Jack. We could probably smother her in her sleep" Angel sniffed.

"How would that help?" Jerry sighed.

"She'd be dead and I'd feel all warm and fuzzy inside" Bobby said blankly.

"No, you wouldn't, because Jack wouldn't be any better" Jerry stated "What we gotta do is stay here, be here, for our brother"

"Don't go all saintly on us Jerry, not now" Angel snapped, but without much conviction.

"I'm just saying it wont help any if we go doing something stupid…hell if we _did_ end the bitch, we'd end up in prison or somewhere and when Jack wakes up we wont be there for him like he needs us to be" Jerry said.

Bobby seemed about to speak, hesitated, then continued "He has Ma" he said very quietly, his tone making it clear he didn't like it even as he said it.

"Yeah, 'cause Ma could single handedly fix him after this" Jerry scoffed.

"She managed it with us" Angel pointed out.

"Jackie's not like us" Jerry said quietly "He's been through different things, he's not tough like we are"

"He's plenty tough" Bobby frowned.

"Yeah, but we've seen how he gets…he's all screwed up in his head and as near as I've ever seen only Ma, or us, can calm him down when he loses it…I love Ma but she couldn't handle him all by her self" Jerry told them.

Reluctantly, Angel and Bobby agreed. "So we just…let her be?" Angel asked.

"Jackie getting better is more important than that junkie bitch" Jerry growled.

The doctor who had been tending to Jack since the boy arrived at the hospital came up behind the boys. "You plotting revenge?" he asked in jest.

The four boys turned and stared at him and the smile faded from his face. "Kidding, guys" he held up his hands as if in surrender.

"How is he today?" Angel sighed.

"Actually the tests are looking good, he was fighting the machine this morning" the doctor told them.

"What does that mean?" Bobby frowned.

"That my friends, means your little brother's body can breath on its own, we can take the tube out" he smiled at them.

"Will he wake up?" Jerry asked.

"That, I cant tell you. Maybe he will…the fact that he's breathing on his own, is a very good sign, it means his body's getting stronger. Most cases like this, the patient wakes up not long after we take em off the vent"

"You see ten year olds forcibly over dosed on heroin a lot Doc?" Bobby asked sarcastically.

The doctor ducked his head in apology and headed into the room, the brothers Mercer following.

"The nurse said you where gonna take him off the vent today!" Evelyn said as she wearily climbed to her feet.

Her boys moved to her side and helped her as the doctor pulled on a pair of rubber gloves "That I am Miss Mercer, your boy here is quite the little fighter, I'm going to take the tube out of his throat and let him breathe unassisted. This is good because it means his body is recovering, and at the same time, lets him get stronger" he gave her a kindly smile.

The doctor, whose name was Higgins leaned over Jack and gently removed the tape that held the tube in place. He waited for Jack to breathe in, then as Jack exhaled, pulled the tube out smoothly.

Jack didn't stir, but the machines registering his heart beat didn't start shrieking either, so the Mercers let out individual sigh's of relief.  
Higgins used a small torch to check Jacks eyes "Pupils are equal and responsive" he said happily "That means he's basically just sleeping…but it's a very very deep sleep. He will wake up, just, in his own time" he assured them "Now I really have to suggest that you all go home, get some sleep. There are doctors and nurses here who can take care of him, you all need rest" he said sympathetically.

"I'm not leaving" Jerry said and his brothers nodded in agreement.

"No, he's right, you all need your sleep, you need to go back to school, I need to see to the other kids" Evelyn stated, but from her tone it was clear she didn't like it.

"Fuck school" Bobby snapped.

"Bobby!" Evelyn snapped.

"Ma I aint leavin him" Bobby told her.

"How bout we take it in shifts?" Angel asked "We each stay one night then get some sleep, go to school, switch it up so one of us is always here and the others can get some rest"

"I'll go first" Bobby shrugged.

"No" Evelyn said.

"Ma you haven't slept in four days" Jerry pointed out.

"Have any of you?" Evelyn reminded them.

"It's different with us Ma, we're young and virile" Jerry gave her a small smile.

Evelyn rubbed exhaustedly at her eyes "Fine" she muttered "I gotta go pick up the others from the neighbours" she stated.

She walked over to the bed and leaned over Jack, kissing his forehead lovingly. "I'm gonna go away from a little while Jackie, but I'll be back soon, I swear" she whispered.

She gave Bobby a hug and thanked the doctor, leaving with Angel and Jerry. When they where gone, Bobby sat in the seat Evelyn had been occupying, smiling gently at the flowery smell of her perfume that clung to the blanket one of the nurses had given her at one point. Bobby rose from the chair and walked over to Jack, laying the blanket over his eerily still form.

In a moment of sudden panic, Bobby leaned forward and gently lay his head on Jack's scrawny chest, listening for his heart beat. He heard the soft, rhythmic thump-thump and drew back, pulling the seat closer to the bed so that he could hold Jack's hand. He sat like that for hours, not moving, simply watching Jack's chest rise and fall, watching him surviving.

After a long, long time, Bobby reached forward and stroked a stray lock of dark blonde hair from Jack's forehead, smiling at the still baby like softness of Jack's skin. Anger welled up inside him so strong and sudden that he let go of Jack's hand and latched both of his hands onto the safety rail around Jack's bed, squeezing the metal tubing, putting all the rage he felt into his grip. Tears fell from his eyes, tears he would never let his brothers see as he stared at Jack's frail, damaged form and gripped the rail. His hands tightening and tightening until it came down to the rail giving way under his hands, or Bobby breaking something. He let go suddenly and shoved himself backwards, panting as if he had run a mile. He rose from the chair again, his hands aching, and walked into the small, en suite bathroom just behind him in the private room. Letting the door close behind him Bobby ran cold water over his hands for half an hour while he let himself cry. When his hands where shaking but all but numb, he splashed the water on his face and met his own eye in the mirror "compose yourself" he said, imitating the voice of Nelson, one of the slightly more decent foster dads he had had before he came to Evelyn.

Nelson had been a Marine for years before he was discharged and believed in using military regulations for discipline. Despite his brutality though, he had genuinely cared for the kids under his care, believing that by being harsh, by causing them some pain, he was teaching them about survival, not just harming them because he was a drunk, or just a spiteful bastard. He had taught Bobby that it was a mistake to let your family see you weakened, by anything, and Bobby had taken it to heart. He splashed more water on his face and wiped himself dry with a towel, blowing air out between pursed lips as he continued to meet his own gaze, like a diver preparing for a deep descent.

Any body watching him would have been able to see him physically rebuild his composure. The shudders that had run through his back and shoulders as he wept simply ceased and he hunched in the prepared boxers stance that was his natural stance. His face hardened, his eyes gleaming with their bright, angry light, the angry, grim mask he so often wore sliding back into place under his skin. He sniffed once, rolled his shoulders and neck to work out the tension and stepped back into the room.

Jack's bed was empty.

Bobby physically stepped backwards in shock, blinking at the rumpled sheets on the bed. He opened his mouth but no sound came out as every bad dream he had had since he heard Jack had an aunt seemed to come true before his very eyes. He half stepped into the room scamming it with expert eyes and realised that the machine registering Jack's heart beat with a soft beeping, had not gone off the rails, its alarms shrieking wildly. Which meant Jack wasn't very far away.

Bobby went to move forward again but he remembered a story Jack had told them about how when he was small he would hide under his bed from his father, and all he would ever be able to see where his fathers heavy work boots pacing toward the bed before he was dragged out into the light, into- Bobby cut the memory off and very slowly, lowered himself into a crouch.

Jack was huddled under the hospital bed, clutching Evelyn's blanket to him, his eyes wide open but unseeing. Bobby remembered the 'thousand yard stare' cursing as he saw that the emptiness in Jack's eyes was deeper than it had ever been.

"Jackie?" Bobby called gently, moving awkwardly forward in his crouch.

Jack was rocking slowly back and forth, his breath loud and rasping some what. "Jackie boy it's Bobby" Bobby said softly, "I'm gonna come a little closer, alright?"

Jackie didn't respond but Bobby, watching his brothers eyes very closely, saw them flicker ever so slightly. "Alright then little man, here I come" Bobby sing songed and edge forward again until he was beside the bed, only a few feet away from Jack.

Sitting cross legged, Bobby peered under the bed at his brother.

"Hey kiddo, how you feeling?" Bobby forced himself to make his town conversational.

Jack's eyes stayed distant but he whispered hoarsely "My chest hurts"

Bobby dropped his own eyes for a second as they brimmed with tears of elation at the sounds of Jack's voice. "Yeah?" he asked still gazing at the floor "Well you know you got pretty beat up there Jackie…you know what ya did?" he managed to look up.

"No?" Jack asked curiously, his voice faint.

"Ya died on us kid, a bunch of times, they had to…" Bobby raised his hands, miming defibrillator paddles "tzz, zap you!" he marvelled at his own ability to hold back his emotion as he told Jack about how he had arrested several times in the ER.

"I did that?" Jack asked in amazement.

"Yeah ya little loon" Bobby forced a laugh into his voice watching as the corners of Jack's mouth flickered upwards in a fleeting glimpse of a smile.

"_You_ cant laugh at it, we where laughin at you, you looked like that worm we electrocuted that time, ya remember?" Bobby asked, seeing the faintest hint of warm recollection dart into Jack's eyes like a scared deer.

"It exploded" Jack said seriously "I don't feel good but I'm not exploded" he pointed out.

"Still looked like a worm" Bobby shrugged.

"Well you look like an ass" Jack whispered back, finally glancing at Bobby "A baboon ass"

"Yeah well, you look like Tinkerbell, blondie" Bobby shot back smiling.

"Well you look like Smee" Jack whispered, his rocking motion slowing.

"Well you look like Princess Tiger Lily" Bobby smarmed.

"Princess Tiger Lily could fight, you look like Wendy" Jack gave a near silent giggle.

"Well, you look like…uh, La Vida Loca!" Bobby tried.

"You look like her fat ass mom" Jack threw back almost instantly.

"You look like a fart"

"You got fart breath"

"You got shit breath" Bobby pulled tongues at his brother.

"You are shit breath" Jack flipped him off with his good hand.

There was light in his eyes now, but they where still haunted as he looked at Bobby.

"You're shit on my shoe" Bobby returned with a double bird flip.

"You _wish _you where shit on my shoe, you're a amoeba living on a piece of shit that aint even good enough for me to step in" Jack raided an eyebrow at Bobby who burst out laughing, knowing when he was beat.

Jack didn't laugh but he gave small, nervous smiles as Bobby recovered himself.

"You scared us kid" Bobby told Jack, growing suddenly serious.

"They scared me" Jack whimpered.

He crawled forward suddenly, ignoring the IV's that ripped from his arms, the heart monitor that shrieked as the tab was pulled from his chest. Bobby leaned under the bed and grabbed Jack even as the child crawled, pulling him into the gentlest bear hug he could manage, wary of Jack's fragile state.

He felt Jack tense in his arms as if an electrical bolt had run through him as the door behind them opened with an audible click.

"Oh, he's awake?" the voice of a female nurse exclaimed "I'll go get the doctor" she left hurriedly.

"Bobby" Jack gasped, his voice gone high and fearful.

"Jackie its okay, they're not bad people, they're only gonna help you out" Bobby reassured him.

He stood easily, his stomach roiling at how light Jack was. The kid had never exactly been weighty to begin with but now Bobby felt as is he was lifting a bag of twigs. "First order of business Cracker Jack we're getting you some fucking cheeseburgers" Bobby stated simply as he sank back into his original seat, with Jack in his arms.

"I want curlie fries" Jack told him, relaxing instantly in his brothers arms, laying his head on Bobby's chest.

Bobby had a flash to the night he, Angel and Jerry had officially 'sworn' Jack into the family. It had been a situation not unlike this, after a local creep had gotten a grip of Jack, Jack had, bluntly, freaked out and wrecked the Mercer house. That night he had been woken by terrible night terrors and after Evelyn had calmed him the brothers had sworn to protect Jack no matter what. Jack had fallen asleep in Bobby's arms that night. Something about having Jack close to him, having his little brother where he could see him, felt right, natural to Bobby, as he knew it did to Angel, to Jerry.

The door opened again and that same bolt of fear ran through Jack's body.

"It's alright, this is doctor Higgins" Bobby murmured to Jack.

"Hi there" Higgins stayed by the door, smiling kindly at Jack, "You mind if I come in and take a look at your arms?" he nodded to the bloody wounds on Jack's arms from the ripped out IV's and held a small bag of medical supplied up for Jack to see "It's just band aids and clean wipes" he promised.

Internally, Bobby applauded the doctor for how he was acting. Instead of just barging in he was giving Jack the control, putting him at ease.

Jack looked up at Bobby who raised his eyebrows at him, letting him know it was his choice. Jack nodded at Bobby and Bobby looked up "You can come in Doc" he gave the man a tight smile.

"Thanks Jack" the doctor smiled again. Holding the small bag in one hand, and holding his other hand out to the side, showing it was empty, Higgins walked into the room. He pulled the second chair around so that he sat opposite Jack and Bobby.

Jack was shaking in Bobby's arms.

"Can I see your arm?" Higgins asked politely.

Bobby knew it took a lot for Jack to let this strange man touch him, but he reached out his arm slowly, taking deep breaths "Jackie breath normal buddy" Bobby said to calm him.

Higgins pulled on a pair of rubber gloves and very slowly, reached for Jack's arm. When he touched Jack's skin the boy flinched like he'd been burned and Higgins held his hands up "Sorry Jack" he said quietly.

Jack reached his arm back out and Higgins took a sterilised wet wipe from his pack. He took Jack's wrist in one hand, not so tightly that Jack couldn't take his hand back if he chose too. He wiped gently at the small, ragged punctures and tears in Jack's skin where the IV needles had ripped out.

Jack hissed in pain and lay his head on Bobby's chest. "I called your mom" Higgins told them as he began wiping with a new cloth "She screamed into that phone so loud she almost burst my ear drum" he joked "She's on her way over" he smiled.

"Thanks doc" Bobby said quietly.

"No problem. Hey Jack?" Higgins asked "You know when I'm finished with your arm here? Could I take a look at your head? And at your back and your chest? I want to make sure your organs aren't trying to stage a rebellion, mine did once now I'm hollower than the Tin Man" he gave Jack another grin, to which Jack raised a brow.

"I guess you're too old for my jokes huh?" Higgins asked seriously.

"I would be too old if I was five" Jack rasped.

"Yeah you probably would…so how about it, can I make sure you're still ticking? And uh, how about I look at your throat too, see if I cant do anything about that voice ya got?" he asked.

Jack gave a noncommittal shrug but it meant yes.

When his arm was dealt with, Jack let Higgins examine his throat and head. Higgins removed the bandages that had encased Jack's head and discarded them, pressing his fingers t the back of Jack's skull and nodding happily. "Now's the hard part kiddo, your back and chest are real bruised up, so I'm gonna say right now, I'm sorry if I hurt you when I'm examining you, I don't mean too, its just necessary" Higgins gave Jack an apologetic frown.

Bobby sat Jack on the bed and helped Higgins to remove the hospital pyjamas he wore. Higgins removed the layer of bandages which hadn't really done more than act as cushioning and Bobby bit back a hiss at the ugly, purple-black bruises that decorated Jack's body.

Higgins, very gently, pressed his hands to the bruises, checking for anything loose or chipped. Jack's face was screwed up in pain as Higgins asked him to raise on arm so he could reach a particular spot. "Well, you are one lucky little so an so! You where hurt buddy, real hurt but you're doing just fine now!" Higgins gave Jack a warm, friendly smile. "So here's what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna have a nurse come in here with some fresh new PJ's for ya, and then we're gonna get you settled back in your bed, then while I go out and get you some real food, non of this hospital mulched cardboard crap, a friend of mine is going to come and talk to you, ok?" Higgins asked and again, Bobby had to internally compliment the guy.

"Ok" Jack said quietly.

Higgins left and sure enough a nurse brought the new pyjamas, let Bobby help Jack change, settled Jack in his bed, then walked out. Almost as soon as she left a woman with long, curly brown hair entered the room.

"Hi!" she said brightly "I'm Megan, I'm…I'm some one you can talk to" she smiled and Bobby immediately called her for a police appointed child psychiatrist sent to get Jack's statement. She had a bag with her and he was betting there where those stupid ass rag dolls in there. "The doctor told me you don't seem to want to be away from Bobby so I'm just gonna let him stay, I want you to be comfortable" she beamed at them.

"So Jack, do you remember the very first night you where taken away from you daddy?" Megan asked bluntly.

Jack blinked at her, then nodded slowly, almost as if amused by her. "You probably talked to somebody like me that night, some one who had" she reached into her back and pulled out the dolls Bobby had already known where there "dollies like this?" she asked.

Jack shot a cynical look at Bobby that made Bobby sad, because Jack was ten years old and cynicism should have been years away.

"Yes" Jack answered "And I talked to them since then too, in evaluations" he explained.

"And those times, you told that person what your daddy and those other men did?" Megan was still smiling and it was beginning to irritate Bobby. "Yes ma'am" Jack said and Bobby could hear the edge in his voice and immediately tensed in his chair.

"Well, would you like to tell me about, what happened at Amelia's house?" Megan took a pen and notebook from her back and Bobby stared open mouthed. She was clearly an amateur .

Jack blinked again "They where all doing drugs" he said and Bobby alone heard the unspoken 'duh' in Jack's tone.

"mhmm and what about Vern, would you like to tell me about Vern?" Megan looked dead at Jack, meeting his eyes and gazing at him with a sort of, aggressive sincerity.

Jack blinked and dropped his own gaze, the blood draining from his eyes, his whole body tensing like a cat coiled to strike "No I wouldn't" he said raggedly.

"Try for me Jack, this is important" Megan tried to sound sympathetic but her voice came out in a condescending whine.

"I don't know anything he was friends with Amelia and he helped her stick that needle in me" Jack said.

"Is that all? Because Amelia told me that Vern was up in your room and that you where screaming" Megan again, tried and failed at sympathy

Bobby gripped his chair as rage boiled through him at this news. He glared at the oblivious Megan.

"Did Vern touch you Jack? Would you like to show me on the dolly where Vern hurt you?" she placed one of the dolls in front of Jack and when he didn't move, she made a mistake.

She reached out and took hold of his arm to move it toward the doll.

Jack erupted in the way Bobby had known he would. But this, he saw immediately, was different. Normally when Jack had an outburst he attacked _things_, smashing plates, windows, wrecking objects. But this time, Jack leapt, like a pouncing cat at Megan, some how despite his lack of any real mass hitting her with enough momentum to drive her down to the ground.

Bobby blinked in shock as he ran around the bed. Jack, in between swearing in Megan's face using words Bobby hadn't even known Jack knew, was actually growling at her, bearing his teeth and snarling like an enraged animal. Megan was screaming and flailing uselessly as Jack pulled at her hair and Bobby realised he couldn't pull Jack off without hurting him but decided he could apologise later. He wrapped one arm around Jack and scooped him up with more difficulty than he expected, but he got the kid up. Jack twisted this way and that and some how he was able to turn and bite Bobby's hand, hard, sharp teeth sinking into Bobby's skin. Bobby yelled and let go of Jack, recoiling his hand the way he would had it been a snapping dog and Jack fell to the floor running out of the room. Bobby ran after him as Jack sprinted down the corridor but up ahead the elevator doors hummed open and Evelyn Mercer stepped out, Angel and Jerry at her side.

Jack halted dead in his tracks and it was as if a shadow was lifted from him.

He ran toward Evelyn wordlessly and she dropped to her knees, sobbing. Jack reached her and flung himself into her arms, hugging her tightly as if for dear life and all but disappeared under her hug and the thick coat she wore. Bobby couldn't help but smile at the sight, and even as Jack's heart wrenching sobs filled the air, Bobby shared a knowing look with his brothers. Jackie was going to be okay.


	8. Chapter 8

Alright my darlings, this is a short chapter that exists only to lead into the next bit which will be five years on because want Jack to be at least 15 for his next set of super fun happy adventures!

Erm...disclaimers apply as always, language, talk of abuse, etc, i dont own any of the brothers (but i shaaalll) and please R+R.

i apologise for the lateness in my updates lately ive just been mad busy and battling writers block, he's a tricky little SOB but the next chapter should be pretty decent cos i have a zillion and one idea's and no real urge to actually like, sleep, ever!

Dedicatedto all my reviewers who wanted to see Jack have things go decent in his life, but still be all scrwed up, lol!

xx

* * *

Jack was sitting at the small child sized table, his face blank. The other kids around him played happily, the lilting sounds of theuir laughter, thier games, filling the air.He was watching them with an odd look in his eyes. He looked afraid, but in the way a beaten dog would look afraid of its master, fearful of a beating but aware he could easily defend himself. He didn't play with any of the toys that had been laid out, he simply sat, quietly, calmly.

"You see why we're concerned?" the bespectacled African American doctor turned to Evelyn.

"Doctor Wood, Jack was only allowed out of his room a few days ago…and you've said yourself that given what he's been through it's likely he wont interact well with other kids his age" Evelyn pointed out.

Wood nodded "Yes, I said he wouldn't interact _well_. Jack isn't interacting at all"

He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose "Miss Mercer was Jack social when he first came to you?" the doctor asked.

"Not at all" Evelyn told him "He barely spoke to me or the other boys. At first. After a few weeks he came out of his shell, once he was comfortable around us, we introduced him to the neighbourhood kids, started sending him to school…he has a lot of friends now" Evelyn explained.

"I'm sure he does, but I'm still concerned about his reactions to strangers" Wood sighed.

"Doctor you know what happened to him, yes? That almost every _stranger_ who has come into his life has hurt or abused him in some way?" Evelyn raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, of course I do" Wood said back, not angrily, simple replying.

"Well it's been my experience, Doctor, that kids who suffer at the hands of strangers are more often than not, _wary of strangers_" Evelyn gave him a wry grin "besides, Jack doesn't play with toys and those kids in there and the sorts of kids he usually hangs out with" Evelyn shrugged.

"Yes I understand he spends most of his time with his brothers, who are all sixteen?" Wood asked.

"Near enough. He feels safe with them" She answered the question Wood had been about to ask.

"I think he needs more friends his own age" Wood stated.

"As I just told you, he has friends his own age" Evelyn repeated.

"Then why wont he engage with any of the kids in the room" Wood nodded in the direction of the daycare/observation room.

"Do any of those kids come from a neighbourhood like ours?" Evelyn asked "Because I don't want to play the whole 'wrong side of the tracks' down town versus up town debacle, but the fact is, Jack doesn't see himself as having anything in common with those kids, not just because of what he's suffered through, but because of where he's from. Look I know you're going to tell me he has _this_ problem and _that_ trauma. We already know he has attachment disorders, that he has night terrors, that he sleep walks, he has his outbursts" Evelyn listed "he has deep emotional scars, severe emotional trauma…we have known for three years, nothing you're telling me is news" she shook her head "We deal with it. When can I take him home?"

"Well Harris is his physician, I only look after his mind" Wood told her a little snottily "Given his recovery though…probably a few days" he told her. "Look Miss Mercer, I'm just telling you…his 'deep emotional scars'? they could very easily come back to haunt him in time"

"And where is Doctor Harris?" Evelyn asked, nodding in acknowledgment of his prediction.

"I'm here" Harris called out brightly "I said I would be here and here I am, I got held up in the ER" Harris pulled a 'what are you going to do?' face.

"When can he leave?" Evelyn cut straight to the chase. Jack had been in the hospital for weeks and she was itching to get him home.

Harris smiled kindly at her "Today" he stated.

"Already!" Evelyn smiled.

"He's already way stronger than anyone thought he would be at this point, besides I think if I don't release him you and those boys are gonna bust him out!" Harris gave a shrug "I can have the paper work sorted out by lunchtime and you can take him home" he cut off abruptly as Evelyn grabbed him and hugged him tight.

"Thank you" she whispered, tears of happiness rolling down her face "Thank you!"

* * *

"So the twins are gone?" Jack, bundled up in his thickest jacket, scarf and woolly hat was sitting in the front seat, looking like he was simply a ball of clothes with a face.

"Yeah, their aunt took em to Alaska!" Evelyn told him.

"But I thought Alaska was a million miles away?" Jack asked.

"They wanted to go, but it's okay because they arranged it so their mom went too, she figures life up there will be easier to handle, so she wont relapse again…at least that's the theory" Evelyn shrugged.

"What about Li?" Jack was peering out of the window curiously as Evelyn drove.

"He's going in two weeks, found a family for him yesterday!" Evelyn smiled.

"Good, I didn't like him he was a jerk" Jack scoffed.

Evelyn chuckled "Hey don't say that too him though! Be nice until he leaves, okay?" she gently scolded "And he's been asking and worrying about you, so he's not that big a jerk"

"Alright" he shrugged.

They where nearing the Mercer house and Jack began to bounce in his seat, eager to get home.

As Evelyn pulled the car into the drive way, Jack threw the door open and bolted from his seat charging toward the door. Laughing, Evelyn ran after him, locking the car hurriedly, resolving to get his suitcase of belongings from Amelia's house and from the hospital, later on. He ran up the porch steps but she caught up with him "Sh!" she grinned "They don't know I'm bringing you back today!"

Jack matched her grin and stepped back as she unlocked the door and let her self in, yelling a casual hello.

"Ma, do you know where my old skates are?" came Jerry's distracted response "Cos I thought they where in my room but they're not"

Smiling conspiratorially at Jack, Evelyn shouted back, "Maybe their under the stairs, come down here and look. I'll be in the kitchen with Jack" she took Jack's hand and started to walk.

"No they wouldn't be under the stairs I – What!" Jerry yelled suddenly.

There was a thump from the den and another from the bathroom and the sounds of scuffling from the attic bedrooms.

Evelyn giggled, lifting Jack onto the counter and helping him wriggle quickly out of his coat and hat, tossing them aside as everyone charged into the kitchen.

Angel, soaking wet and wrapped in a towel some how got there first, pulling Jack into a hug. "We didn't know you where coming home!" he laughed as Jack lovingly pushed him away, complaining about the water.

"Dr Harris signed him out especially" Evelyn beamed.

There came another thump and Bobby and Jerry raced each other into the room.

"He tackled me from the fourth step Ma" Bobby said off handedly as he walked over and swept Jack up in a big hug.

Jerry lifted Jack out of Bobby's arms and gave him held him close "He went down like a little bitch" he whispered in Jack's ear.

"Hi sweetie!" Diane grinned, giving Jack a quick, nervous hug.

"Hey man" Li shrugged, trying to play casual but clearly happy to see Jack.

"Hi everybody" Jack smiled, his voice still a little gruff from the intubation weeks earlier.

"Oh my god" Diane squealed a little girlishly.

"Sh!" Bobby hissed.

"What is it?" Evelyn asked.

"Maria just dropped something off before that she needs you to look at is all" Jerry told her, motioning to a thick envelope on the counter "Hey Jackie man, sorry we don't have anything organised for your homecoming" he frowned apologetically "How about we all make a fucking huge ass cake" he grinned.

"Language" Evelyn called automatically, picking up the envelope.

"A Freaking huge cake then?" Jerry rolled his eyes.

"Hey we all bought you some…little…you know, things" Diane said sheepishly, nudging Li "Go get em"

Rolling his eyes, Li ran out of the room while Evelyn tore open the envelope and removed the contents, reading the hand written cover note that came with it.

Li ran back in, awkwardly hefting a large bag.

"Give him his stuff I gotta go get dressed" Angel smiled, jogging away.

"Alright" Bobby knelt beside the bag "These are from everyone all together but we all got you separate stuff too" He held a brand new pair of ice skates aloft, grinning at the delighted grin on Jack's face.

"This came from Angel" Bobby held up a pair of boxing gloves "He wants you to start sparring with him" he put the gloves next to the boots as Jack looked on in glee.

"This is so cool!" Jack grinned.

"All for you buddy" Jerry smiled "This was from me" Jerry grinned as Bobby removed a large, hard back note book "It's like…a scrap book or a notebook or whatever, I mean I know you like drawing and stuff and keeping stuff outta magazines…you can keep it all in here" he tried to play it off a Jack's face lit up.

"Wow!" the kid grinned.  
"My one is sort of lame" Li shrugged as Bobby handed Jack a stack of video's "Its just some rock concerts, they're pretty funny though" he smiled shyly.

"Thanks Li" Jack said, genuinely happy.

"Diane you want to explain about yours?" Bobby grinned up at her.

"Yeah…um…its cheap and old and out of tune but I can teach you to use it and tune it and everything and hey maybe you can write songs in that book Jerry gave you and stuff?" She showed Jack the battered guitar.

"Diane!" Jack exclaimed "All of you! This stuff is amazing!" he smiled at them.

"This is mine" Bobby handed him a small box "it's…what I gave you when you went away but better"

Jack looked at Evelyn's back and mouthed 'a knife?' to Bobby who nodded and put his finger to his lips in a 'don't say a word' gesture.

"This one is mine" Evelyn handed Jack one of the sheets of paper she had been reading through "I just signed it"

Frowning slightly, Jack took the paper and began to read it. His frown turned into a look of confusion which gave way to a look of delight "Is this-?" he looked up at Evelyn.

"Yes, that's what it is, its It!" Evelyn was smiling manically "You all knew?" she turned to the other kids who nodded enthusiastically.

"Maria told us" Jerry smiled "She said with what happened, she just pushed it through, her boyfriend helped her out…" he shrugged.

"Adoption papers!" Jack yelled. "Ma these are adoption papers! I'm yours now!" his eyes where shiny with tears.

"No one can take you away" Evelyn pulled him into a long hug "Not ever, you are mine now"

"I'm adopted!" Jack yelled almost in her ear "No one can come get me!" he hugged everyone including Angel who came back into the kitchen, dried and dressed.

"He knows?" Angel asked returning the hug "It's official now little brother, we can officially rag on you, we can beat you up, make you do all our chores, and there aint a damn thing you can do about it!" he laughed.

Jack was grinning from ear to ear, tears rolling down his cheeks. "I don't want to do anything about it, I don't care what you do!" he all but leapt into Evelyn's arms, burying his face in the crook between her shoulder and neck.

Evelyn hugged him back , her own eyes teary. "I love you mom" he whispered.

Smiling, she whispered back "I love you Jackie"

* * *

"Hey! Hey Jackie Boy!" some one was yelling at Jack as he walked down the corridor on the way to Hockey practice, "Jaaaaackieeee!" the yeller dragged it out, making a joke of it.

Sighing, Jack turned around to face the yeller "What do you want Martin?" he asked as Martin, taller than Jack, blonde haired, looking oilier than a slick.

"Where you goin Jackie?" Martin sneered as he oozed up to Jack.

"Hockey practice" Jack stated "And you're making me late so…" he shrugged.

"I need a favour" Martin asked.

"What?" Jack rolled his eyes.

"Mr Bonasera took a game boy game away from me today, put it in his right pants pocket. It's my brothers game and he'll kick my ass if I don't give him it back" Martin shrugged.

"Twenty bucks" Jack said automatically.

"Seriously?" Martin stared at him.

"Bonasera doesn't alwaysbuy into my cute kid routine if I get caught, pay up" Jack stated.

"I can give you ten now" Martin frowned.

"Fine" Jack rolled his eyes.

He pulled Martin with him to the end of the corridor, pressing his back to the wall briefly. "What are we doing?" Martin asked.

"This time of day, Bonasera is always in the office, he'll be coming out…now" Jack said the word and a tall, dark man in a rumpled suit strode out of the office, briefcase in hand.

Jack pushed Martin away and slipped out into the corridor, staring at the floor as he half jogged until his journey brought him to the teacher. Jack bumped into the man hard enough that he fell back wards and landed on his rump with a grunt of pain, throwing an accusing, petulant look at the teacher.

Bonasera, in a uniquely good mood crouched down and took Jack's hand, helping him to his feet. "You alright?" he asked.

"Yes sir" Jack nodded "Sorry" he wrinkled his nose, playing the cute card.

"You're that Mercer kid aren't you?" Bonasera asked "You been back at school what, three months?"

"Yessir" Jack nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets ands scuffing his shoes as if he was shy.

"How you liking it? Everybody treating you right, no one hassling you?" the teacher asked gruffly.

"It's fine" Jack shrugged.

"You want to give back what you just took out of my pocket?" Bonasera sniffed.

Jack dropped the act and stared directly at the man "I don't know what you mean sir" he lied.

"Turn out your pockets" Bonasera told him.

"No" Jack gave him a polite grin, his tone calm and pleasant.

"Am I gonna have to search you?" Bonasera coked his head.

"Sir, you lay a single hand on me and I'll scream so loud the whole world will come running" Jack's smile never fell, his tone never changed.

Bonasera raised an eye brow at him. "I'll be watching you Mercer. I know about all you and your brothers. I ever see you pullin any of the stunts your brothers did, there's gonna be some trouble" he said warningly.

"I really don't understand sir" Jack coked his head to one side "I'd better go or I'm gonna be late for practice" he smiled and walked casually away.

Out side the school, Martin ran to catch up with Jack. "Did you get it?" he asked hurriedly.

"Course I did, now give me my money" Jack stated.

Martin fished out a crumpled ten dollar bill and pushed it into Jack's hand. Jack checked the note and gave a shrug, handing Martin the game.

"How'd you do that man, I was watching for it and I didn't even see it!" Martin asked.

"It's easy" Jack shrugged again and rolled his shoulders to shift his back pack"And now I'm fucking late so get out of here" Jack gave Martin a shove.

"Thanks Jackie boy" Martin said, using that same wheedling tone now that his favour was done.

Jack caught Martins collar as the boy walked away and dragged him backwards.

"Hey!" Martin yelped.

"If you say my name like that again I will make you regret it" Jack said coolly.

"Alright" Martin licked his lips nervously "Sorry man" he whispered.

Jack gave him a blank look and released him, sending him away.

"Mother fucker making me late" he muttered to himself, running for the rink.

* * *

"COME ON MERCER GET THE LEAD OUT!" the coach yelled from the side of the rink as Jack narrowly avoided being tackled by a boy much larger than him.

"I AM!" Jack yelled back, banging his hockey stick on the ice angrily.

"Fucking pansy" the tacklingkid said as he skated by Jack.

Jack growled and tightened his hands around his stick, waiting for the puck to be shot back to him. When one of his team mates passed the puck his way Jack made a bee line for the opposite teams goal, his still new and sharp skates gliding over the ice. He ducked under another tackle and made a shot at the goal whooping to himself as he saw the puck slide past the goalie.

Some one rammed into him in an intentionally late tackle and Jack grunted as he fell on the arm he had had broken only a few months before. He shouldn't have been skating on the arm, but he had lied to the coach about how serious it was. The other kids knew though, especially Chuck, who had tackled him. Chuck had even asked how serious a break it was.

Jack climbed to his feet, skating after Chuck with single minded intent. As he got close he swung his hockey stick at Chuck's legs from behind. Chuck screamed and fell, rolling to see who had struck him as Jack shook his hockey gloves off, yanked off his helmet and dove on the kid.

Chuck started shouting but Jack quickly silenced him with a punch to the mouth as Chuck reached up and began to fight back. Chuck managed to roll on top of Jack, throwing a wild punch that connected through sheer luck.

Jack growled and dug a knee into Chuck's side awkwardly, ignoring the shouts that where coming from the other kids.

"What the hell!" Came the coaches voice and Jack felt a hand grip his collar and drag him out from under Chuck as another coach yanked Chuck to his feet.

"Who started this!" The coach barked.

"The little orphan psycho attacked me!" Chuck squealed.

Jack booked for him again, stumbling slightly as the coach yanked him backwards "Calm it down Mercer!" the man snapped.

" he came in on a tackle late on purpose" Jack snapped.

"What you think you're Bobby all of a sudden?" the coach asked "go get changed and go home Jack, Chuck you too, you both need to learn some discipline, so detention on Friday after school both of you, be there or you don't play on the weekend" he released Jack giving him a gentle but pointed push toward the edge of the ice.

Chuck started to plea his case but Jack shrugged and skated away, scooping up his equipment as he went.

Chuck eventually followed, whining the whole way.

"What is up with that kid!" the assistant coach asked his senior.

"He's all fucked up in his head, bad shit happened to him, he's been different since he came back to school" the coach told the younger man, shooing all the other kids back to the game.

"Different how?"

"Like you just saw, more aggressive, angrier…its sad really, he was a sweet kid up until a few months ago. What ever that last thing to happen was…it broke something inside of him. He'll probably end up like his brothers, with a juvie record longer than I am tall" the coach shook his head, watching Jack as the boy walked toward the changing rooms. He sniffed, squinting thoughtfully "What a fucking waste"


	9. Chapter 9

Right, this is more like it!Okay, the last Chapter was basically to get Jack home and to show the beginnings of how his traumas have affected him, i personally wasnt over the moon with it but i honestly could not think of any other ways to write it!

But you still reviewed in the positive and i thank you all for it, you're all MARVELLOUS.

Disclaimer: Alright kids, this ones a doozy, we've got foul language, drug use, self harming, references to underage sex...its pretty dark actually, so be warned, Jackie's going off the rails an bit and i dont really want to hold back on it so, this is how it is.

My thanks and love as always go out to my reviewers, to Aly, cos she rocks and doesnt realise how much repsecti have for her and how she inspires me (well she does to some degree cos i rob stuff off her but i say sorry, lol!), and to my darling Mikey who has and will help me out with the music stuff and is the image of Garrett Hedlund and who i love to death, TO DEATH MIKEY.

R+R.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

* * *

"Hey Mercer, you do that English assignment?" one of the teenagers slurred, passing the lit joint across to Jack.

Jack, fifteen years old, took the joint and took a lazy hit, holding it in for as long as he was able before letting the smoke billow out between his lips "I did it a week ago man" he said lazily "No you're not lending my copy, do you own fuckin work" he sniffed, running one hand through his scruffy dark blonde hair.

"Aw come on man" the kid muttered, sinking into his seat on the couch "Just, this…this one time" he asked.

"No" Jack stated coolly.

"Fuck" the kid spat.

"This shit aint doin dick for me" Jack frowned at the joint "What'd you do, dry up some friggin crab grass?" he turned to his companion, a kid named Gordie.

"No, its from my guy" Gordie said defensively "And I don't think there's anything wrong with it" he added petulantly.

"That's cos you don't know good shit" Jack shook his head, pushing himself to his feet "Where will your guy be, I'm gonna go get some real stuff and not…oregano, what ever this crap is" Jack coughed heavily into his hand, pulling an inhaler from his pocket and taking a hit.

"I'll show you" Gordie sighed, standing reluctantly.

They walked out of the basement den emerging in the kitchen. Gordie's mother was leaning over the kitchen table, reading a magazine while something sweet smelling baked in the oven behind her.

"Mom we're going out" Gordie called nervously.

"Okay honey, don't be too long" she answered, glancing up at them.

She saw Jack and her face hardened momentarily "Hello Jack" she said, polite but forcibly so.

"Hi Mrs Fry" Jack replied not even pretending to be pleasant about it.

"How's your mother?" Mrs Fry asked, her eyes flickering to his out fit.

Jack wore worn out black jeans, battered sneakers, a long sleeved t-shirt under a worn out Nirvana short sleeved t and a tired looking denim jacket "She's just fine" Jack gave her a tight grin.

He was not, and never had been comfortable around adults who where not his mother Evelyn. People like Gordie's mother where the worst, as they took an instant dislike to him due to his back ground. They would be aggressive to him in attitude if not physically, or they would just be flat out rude and Jack didn't react well.

"And your brothers, isn't one of them in prison, again?" She crossed her arms over her chest, shooting angry looks at her son.

"No ma'am, Bobby just got out, Jerry's getting married next year and Angel just wrote us from overseas" Jack told her proudly.

"Mmhmm?" her grin was tightening as she got more and more angry "And what about you, have you been keeping out of trouble?"

"Nope" Jack shrugged, not seeing any reason to lie "Bye Mrs Fry"

Gordie was snickering into his hand as Jack turned on his heel and walked out of the kitchen, through the house, and out the front door. Shooting his mother nervous looks, Gordie ran after Jack, catching up with him at the end of the drive way.

"Where's your guy I hate bein fuckin sober on a weekend?" Jack asked, shoving his hands in his pockets in lieu of gloves.

"Uh, he'll be by Moira's, he goes there sometimes" Gordie nodded to himself.

They walked hurriedly to the old Irish bar, striding past it and rounding the corner it stood near.

"Where is he?" Jack asked.

"That's him" Gordie pointed to a man of about 30 sitting on a bench, pretending to read a magazine.

Jack strode over and sat beside him, gazing out casually at the street.

"Hey man" the man said "I'm Hook" he told his magazine.

"Hook you sold my buddy oregano" Jack told him.

"Yeah kid?" Hook shrugged "So?"

"So he's a fucking idiot, I'm not, I know crap from good shit and I want to buy some good shit" Jack gave a wave of his hand and Gordie ran over to him, sitting beside him on the bench.

"Hey Hook man, this is Jack" Gordie said as an introduction.

"I sell you shit man?" Hook asked him.

"Jack says you did" Gordie told him.

"How the fuck does 'Jack' know?" Hook asked aggressively.

"Jack Mercer" Jack said stoically.

Hook hesitated in turning the page of his magazine briefly.

"Mercer" he repeated.

"Yeah man" Gordie noticed Hook's reaction and warmed to the subject "As in the Mercer brothers" he nodded "He aint just some punk he's some one you gotta be wary of" Gordie grinned.

"So what do you want man?" Hook asked.

"I told you already, I want good shit, I want to get fucked up today" Jack stated "I'm bored as fuck" he said.

"I got lots of shit man, I have weed, I have some pills, I got lots of shit" Hook grinned.

"just give me some shit to get me stoned" Jack shook his head angrily.

"I can give you enough to get you through this weekend and next, good real quality stuff too, if this shit doesn't get you stoned then you got the tolerance level of a fuckin elephant" Hook grinned.

"Jack did heroin when he was ten man" Gordie bragged.

Jack grabbed Gordie's leg and squeezed tightly, to the point that Gordie squealed in pain and grabbed Jack's wrist to try and make him let go "You don't talk about that Gordie, what did I tell you?" Jack leaned close to Gordie as he spoke, his tone void of emotion but some how threatening.

Hook watched the exchange with wide eyes as Jack shoved Gordie off the bench.

"How much?" Jack asked.

"Seventy" Hook responed.

Jack looked straight at him and Hook resisted the urge to gulp "But for a Mercer, call it fifty five?" he raised an eyebrow at Jack "And that includes the pills"

Jack sighed and began to dig through his pockets, coming up with twenty in crinkled notes. He yelled to Gordie for more and Gordie came up with fifteen.

"We got thirty five" Jack looked at Hook.

"I can only go so low, even for a Mercer" Hook shrugged.

"So we need to make up twenty?" Jack nodded to himself "I can make it worth your while if you just give us it for what we have" Jack met Hook's eye and gave him a tiny suggestive smile.

Hook took a second before he realised what Jack meant, then drew back ever so slightly "I'm not into that man" he said quietly.

"Then we got a problem" Jack squinted.

"I'm not but I know some people who are. I'll give you the shit for what I got and if you give me your number I'll 'hook' you up with some people, you can pay me off" Hook told him.

"I can pay you off with one meeting" Jack frowned.

"Maybe I can hook you up with more stuff down the line if you keep doing these jobs" Hook was staring across the road, "You're what, fourteen?"

"fifteen" Jack corrected.

"You don't this sort of thing before?" Hook asked.

"Would I be offering it if I hadn't?" Jack shot back "When I was a kid my dad saw the potential. And the last couple summers, if I get bored or I want money…" he trailed off and shrugged again.

"So you know how this works out?" Hook asked.

"Duh" Jack rolled his eyes.

"Alright. Gimme your number and my money. Then put your hand down beside your leg, in between us both" Hook told him.

Jack dug a piece of paper and a chewed pencil out of another pocket and scribbled down his phone number. He folded the number and the cash into his palm and shook hands with Hook, transferring the money.

He dropped his hand to his side and Hook dug in a pocket, pulling out various baggies and slipped them into Jack's palm.

"I'll call you kid" Hook told him.

Jack stood and strode away, brushing past Gordie.

"Did we get it?" Gordie asked, having missed the quietly spoken final halve of the conversation.  
"Yeah we got it" Jack told him "You got papers?" he asked.

"Yeah"

"Let's go the park and get fucking _stoned_" Jack smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. It never did.

* * *

Jack was sitting at the table, tapping his fork against the side of his plate rhythmically nodding his head in time to some riff he was working on and was playing back inside his own head.

"Jackie?" Evelyn Mercer asked "Aren't you hungry?" she nodded to his untouched plate.

"No Ma" Jack shook his head, "I ate at the park with Gordie" he lied. Jack never got the munchies from smoking a joint, if anything it curbed his appetite. As a result, despite being six feet tall already, he was skinny, toned from boxing, but skinny.

"You never eat" Evelyn correctly remarked, her face still pretty even in her later years.

"I don't get hungry Ma" Jack shrugged "It's not your cookin" he smirked at her.

"I know its not" Evelyn scoffed "It never is, but you cant live on…what, cereal?" she frowned.

"Sure I can, its all carbs and fibre anyway" Jack raised an eye brow.

"At least eat your vegetables?" Evelyn asked.

Jack gave her a look and a smirk "I'm not hungry Ma" he stated "Lizzie can eat em" he nodded at the ten year old girl who was staying with them for a few months while her mother recovered from a car accident.

Lizzie had no past of abuse or neglect, her mother had simply crashed the car leaving Lizzie with no immediate family to take care of her. Since she lived near by anyway it had been no trouble for Evelyn to take her on for the three her four months her mother would be in the hospital recovering.

"I don't want em!" Lizzie squeaked, her own plate half empty "You eat em!"

"It's the law Liz, I'm bigger so I say you have to eat them" Jack shrugged at her.

"Miss Evelyn is that true?" Lizzie looked over at Evelyn.

"No it's not sweetie…Jack if you're not going to eat, go put your plate in the kitchen, I'll save it for if you want it later…Lizzie are you almost done?"

The African American girl nodded, her tight, intricate braids flicking around her head as she tried to emphasize her answer. "Well you finish up and we'll watch a video, have our dessert in the den, alright?" Evelyn smiled.

"We ought to get a DVD" Jack told her.

"We will when they get cheap" Evelyn replied.

Jack grinned and stood, picking up his plate and heading for the kitchen. He wrapped his food and put the plate in the fridge, grabbing a box of cereal from the cupboard and moving to leave the room. The phone rang shrilly and he snatched it from the cradle.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"It's Hook" Came the dealers gruff voice "I got a job for you"

"Where?" Jack asked, picking up a pencil and making a note on the little post it pad Evelyn kept beside the phone.

He got the address and the time and tore the note, and a few of the blank sheets beneath his up, pocketing them "I'll be there" he said blankly.

He walked back through the dining room. "Who was it?" Evelyn asked.

"Gordie, I'm gonna go meet him, I'll be back later" he said in passing, getting out of the house before Evelyn had time to comment.

He looked at the note again and headed to the relevant neighbourhood. He had to take a bus to get there, as the house he was visiting was in the nice part of town. He whistled as he approached the gated house glancing around in the early evening darkness. There was an intercom system and Jack pushed the buzzer.

"Who is it?" a male voice asked.

"Hook sent me" Jack told the box.

There was an electrical hum and the gates began to open slowly, so Jack jogged through them and headed for the door. He knocked at the door casually and waited in the cold night air, shuddering against the cold, or so he told him self.

The door opened and a tall man, taller than Jack, peered out, smiling sweetly. "You should come in out of the cold" he said kindly, pulling the door wide enough for Jack to enter.

Jack walked into the house, whistling again at the size of the house. He immediately began making a list in his head of the various expensive trinkets and figurines he could pocket, automatically crossing off the things that would be missed, the things that could easily be traced, anything that had been personalised in any way. He followed the man into another huge room that contained a roaring fire in an antique heath, and a beautiful mahogany bar set neatly in one corner.  
"Would you like a drink, something to warm you up?" the man asked in the calm tones who had experience in these matters.

"Sure" Jack replied, spotting a bookshelf made of the same wood as the bar and heading over to it.

He began to read some of the titles of the leather bound books and turned to look at the man "You're a judge?" he asked.

"For almost fifteen years now" the whit haired man smiled "names Toby"

"You're into criminal law?" Jack asked "you probably put some friends of mine away" he smiled, walking over to Toby as the man poured him a brandy.

He took the glass and sipped at the drink, nodding appreciatively.

"Don't you have…staff, in a house this big?" Jack asked, leaning on the bar.

"I have a small group of friends who help me keep the house in top running order…it's their night off" the older man chuckled.

"They wouldn't approve?" Jack asked innocently.

"No, no I don't think they would" Toby gave him a smile.

"You mind if I smoke a joint?" Jack held up his baggie of weed from Hook.

"Not if you share" Toby chuckled.

Jack gave him a smile and fished out his papers, constructing a couple of joints carefully and easily. He spoke as he worked "So is or was there a wife in the picture?" he asked politely.

"I had a wife some years ago…we divorced not long after I became a judge. She decided she wanted the prestige that came from being married to a judge, without the burden of being married to a judge" Toby gave a sad smile "I caught her cheating on me with our cleaner, Janine, and sent her on her way"

Jack laughed through a lungful of smoke, passing the joint to Toby as he tried to breath around his cough.

"Sorry, it's not funny" he gasped apologetically, still chuckling faintly.

"No, it is, a dyke and a fag in a loveless marriage for twenty five years. Thank God we never had kids, I can only imagine the damage we would have inflicted" Toby took a hit from the joint and nodded appreciatively "Hook?" he asked, holding the joint up.

Jack nodded, a slow grin spreading over his face.

"So Jack, how experienced are you at…this sort of thing?" Toby asked.

"Very" Jack assured him "But I'm telling you right now, I plan to be as stoned as I can safely get" Jack stated.

"Why?" Toby frowned.

"I might freak out otherwise" Jack said bluntly.

"But I though you where experienced at this" Toby told him.

"Doesn't mean I'm comfortable with it" Jack shrugged. He let a flirtatious grin slide over his lips as he took a long hit of the joint "It's nothing personal Your Honor, I just don't like people"

"Then why do this?" Toby asked.

"I like money and drugs" Jack stated.

"Well why don't you smoke that up and we can go upstairs?" Toby grinned again.

Jack walked over and dropped into one of the deep, plush chairs that where arranged around the fire.

"Why do we even have to go upstairs?" he asked.

Hours later Jack walked in through the front door of his home, stumbling slightly as he closed the door behind him.

He saw that Evelyn and Lizzie where still in the den and pressed his lips together, trying to keep quiet despite his inebriated state. "Is that you Jack?" Evelyn called out.

Jack cursed silently, clenching his teeth briefly to try and compose himself "Yeah Ma" he managed to shout back.

"Come join us?" Evelyn suggested.

"No Ma, I'm just gonna go take a shower, Gordie kicked mud at me" he lied about the last.

"Alright sweetie, well your dinner from before is in the fridge" Evelyn told him.

Jack stared at the door way to the den, chewing his lip as he swayed on his feet. He walked heavily up the stairs, wandering into his room and emptying his pockets. He hid the weed and the pills he had left in a place he knew his mother would never find them. He pulled some of the things he had taken from Toby's house, examining each little piece he had managed to spirit away. It was mostly small crystal or silver pieces, nothing so special it would be missed, while still being aesthetically pleasing enough to make some money when he sold them on.

He pulled off his t shirts, leaving them in a heap on his floor and headed into the bathroom, closing the door and turning the water on hot. He stared at his own reflection in the mirror, noticing the colours on the edge of his vision, rubbing at his eyes. The water warmed up and Jack stripped down, removing the leather wrist cuff and chain he wore wrapped around his right wrist, and stepped into the shower, sitting down in the tub and letting the water spray over him like warm rain. He slumped against the side of the bath, positioning himself in such a way that he could safely doze against the side of the bath but still stay under the spray of the shower.

He dozed, on and off, making sure he was sitting uncomfortably so that the pain kept him mostly long conscious. It took a while for him to realise how much of the dampness on his face, which was angled away from the water, was tears. He leaned over the side of the tub and reached his jeans, pulling them toward him. Digging through his pocket, Jack retrieved his pen knife, thumbing the blade out with ease, examining how the metal glinted in the light. He held his arm up, turning so he stared at the inside of his wrist. Scars, old and new, decorated his wrist, some faded to various degrees, some fresher, one or two clearly made in the last few days.

He held the knife up and pressed the sharp blade to his skin and pressed down, hissing at the first quiver of pain that ran through him, savouring it. He dredged up the memories of what he had done that night with Toby, of what his father had done, of what the men his father had given him to had done. He got all the images and the smells, and the feelings and the fear and the anger, and he visualised it in his head as a black, noxious poison. He had been taught to do this by therapists when he was younger, to give his 'issues' a form and to mentally expel that form. One of the therapists had told him to visualize it as bad air and to expel it in big breaths. Jack had never found that to work, so he had modified it. When he opened his eyes again, he didn't see the blood on his arm as red. It was black, viscous, like oil. Jack drew the blade down slowly, gasping as the pain shot through his whole body, making his nerves tingle in something that walked the line between pain and release.

He sliced again, staring at the blood as it ran down his damp skin, the humidity of the shower making the blood run faster than it normally would. Another slice, deeper this time and the pain overwhelmed him. He dropped the knife clenching his fist as the wave of pain washed over him and he gritted his teeth, clenching his fist. Jack took deep breaths until he felt steady enough to stand. He took another deep breath, letting it out in a long, shuddering sigh. He stepped under the stream of water, holding his arm under the jets. It hurt, but he kept his arm where it was until the pain became something he could bare. He looked at the wounds. In his minds eye, he saw the last dredges of the oily substance that was the badness inside him drain away. Stoically, operating on auto pilot, Jack washed himself, his body and hair, hissing again when the soap got into the cuts on his arms and made them sting.

He let the hot water run on the wounds, cleaning them, then shut off the shower and climbed out, wrapping himself in a thick towel, pressing a dark blue wash cloth to his wrist. He gathered up his clothes and dumped them in the laundry hamper, scooping up the wrist accessories and his knife and darting back to his room as quickly as he could. There was a box of cereal sitting on his desk. Jack smiled, silently thanking his mother as he tore open the box and ate a handful of the cereal.

He dried off and pulled a pair of sweatpants on, pocketing the knife automatically, and pulled the wash cloth away from the wounds. He folded the cloth over and pressed it against his skin until the bleeding began to stop.

He opened a drawer in his desk and pulled out a few band aids, sticking them in place and tugging the wrist bands over them, more or less completely hiding them. Jack picked up the cereal box, his note book, and a pen, and went to sit on his bed, crossing his legs to create a desk for himself. He opened the note book to a marked page on which he had glued several sheets of manuscript. He began to write down notes, humming them in his head as he scribbled them down. He wrote furiously, then without stopping he dropped the pen and pulled a pencil from within the spine of the note book, flipping to a page in the back and starting to sketch manically. His eyes had gone hard and blank as he watched his own hand weaving back and forth, the image taking place on the page. It was an image of an emaciated man struggling to walk forward down a forest path, held back by long thick chains that where hooked into his skin, stretching his skin, spilling his blood in puddles that stained the route he had already walked. The man's face was twisted in a grim snarl of fear and anger and sinewy muscles stood out on his body where he strained against the tugging chains.

Jack gasped suddenly and pushed the note book away from him, onto the floor. He turned his bed side lamp on, but turned the main light of his room out and climbed under the covers of his bed, staring at the bright light. He sat up in the bed, hugging the covers around him and pushed himself back so that his back was pressed against the corner his bed was pushed into. He dug the knife out of his pocket and thumbed the blade out, holding the knife in front of him, staring at his own bedroom door.

Jack knew, he knew for a fact that there was no one on the house that would do him harm, that he was safe, but that knowledge did not sooth him, and he huddled the sheets around him. He reached out his free hand and squeezed the fresh wounds on his wrist, using the pain to keep him focused on the door. And there he sat, until the sun began to rise and his room began to lighten and he began to feel like he could turn off his lamp and go to sleep. He was muttering under his breath to himself and as a bird began to chirp out side his window he pushed himself away from the wall so that he lay on the bed, closing his knife and clenching it in his hand. His body ached all over from being motionless for so long and Jack closed his eyes, knowing that total physical exhaustion would win over eventually, and put him safely to sleep. But as he lay waiting for sleep to come, he prayed, as he did whenever he slept, that he would not dream. His prayers where not heard.


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry for the delay, had writers block! And the next update might be a while coming, i actually have to work for once this week so i wont be able to update too soon, sorry!

Disclaimers: This one is baaaad guys, im being a bitch to Jack this time around so warnings for language, drugs and sexual abuse

* * *

"Jack, time to get up" Jack started awake as Evelyn knocked on his door, mumbling sleepily, waiting for his muddled brain to jog into coherence.

"I'm awake" he yelled, rolling out of bed and hurriedly pulling on a thick sweater as protection against the cold.

He added thick woolly socks and staggered to the bathroom, remembering to put the seat down once he was done, washing his hands sleepily. He made it down the stairs miraculously intact, yawning as he walked into the kitchen.

"What's with the sweater Jackie boy, your fairy ass cant handle the cold!" Bobby grinned from his seat at the counter and Jack grinned from ear to ear as his brother rose to hug him.

"Hey man, when did you get here!" Jack squeezed Bobby hard, feeling the solid muscles under Bobby's clothes.

"Just now little brother, a couple minutes ago" Bobby released him from the hug "Let me look at you, shit Jackie when did you get taller than me!" Bobby grinned, actually stepping back to appraise Jack.

"I don't know man, its not a big deal" Jack shrugged as Evelyn set down a mug off coffee in front of him. "Thanks Ma" he smiled at her.

"So what's been happening kid, any news, anything interesting, come on I been goin nuts wondering what's goin on" Bobby sat back down on his stool, regarding his brother with something close to shock.

"Nothing really, I've been handling things, you know, keeping everything running" Jack told him "There hasn't been anything worth mentioning going on" he wrapped one hand around his mug "Ma what's up with the heatin?" he looked to Evelyn.

"Look out the window Jack" Evelyn laughed.

Jack frowned over at the window and blinked in surprise at the white fuzz that covered the window.

"When did it snow!" he asked incredulously.

"Started about an hour ago" Evelyn told him "a few inches already and it's only the beginning, weather report says we're looking at some bad weather"

"Whoah" Jack raised an eyebrow at the snow.

"We gotta play hockey in that" Bobby murmured happily.

"You wont be able to see a thing!" Evelyn told them.  
"That's the point" Bobby and Jack said in unison.

"Jack, go get dressed while I make you some breakfast" Evelyn smiled at her youngest son as he walked out of the kitchen.

She waited until she heard him climb the stairs then turned to Bobby "You see?" she asked.

"He seems okay to me Ma" Bobby shrugged apologetically.

"Well you wait, he doesn't eat, I don't think he sleeps, I'm positive he's been doing drugs and…he's drifting away from me Bobby, he's going some place inside himself and its not healthy, I'm worried he might be hurting himself" Evelyn told her oldest son.

"Ma he's seems fine! And what do you mean, 'hurting himself'?" Bobby frowned.

"I don't know…just to talk to him?" Evelyn asked.

"Course I will Ma" Bobby gave her a smile.

Evelyn made Bobby and Jack a full breakfast, insisting that Jack eat every morsel when he came back down, even sitting and watching him.

When he was don't, he and Bobby gathered their hockey gear and headed out into the snow.

"What you doin that Ma's worried about you?" Bobby asked as soon as they where outside.

"Nothing" Jack lied, pulling a pack of regular cigarettes from his pocket and lighting one up.

"Well she's worried" Bobby told him "And Ma doesn't get worried without good reason so talk to me kid" Bobby told him.

"Nothing man, she was talking to me the other night when I was stoned is all" Jack shrugged, knowing Bobby wouldn't mind that Jack had been dabbling in some drugs.

"And?" Bobby asked.

"And….nothing man, I'm fine, she's just being Ma, you know how she is" Jack told him, chuckling idly.

"You got some weed on you right now?" Bobby asked.

Jack handed him a ready made joint, taking a long drag on his own cigarette.

"That shit'll give you cancer" Bobby told him.

"I know" Jack shrugged.

"Should you even be smoking that with your chest?" Bobby frowned, referring to the scarring on Jack's lungs from an old injury he had received as a child, that required him to use an inhaler occasionally.

"Probably not" Jack gave him a wink.

Bobby took a hit from the joint and passed to Jack, bending down as Jack discarded his normal joint and took a drag on the joint.

The snowball hit Jack in the face stopping him dead in his tracks.

"You ass" Jack told him, "You're dead" he clenched the joint in his teeth and grabbed his own snowball, hurling it at Bobby.

It caught Bobby across the nose as Bobby turned and Bobby yelped in shock, grabbing more snow tot throw at his brother.

"Wait, wait! Jerry lives two blocks up, we gotta get him!" Jack grinned.

"Oh!" Bobby cheered "Go kid, lead the damn way!" Bobby laughed.

They jogged to Jerry's house, scooping up snowballs as they went, dumping their hockey gear at the end of Jerry's drive way when they reached his house, hiding a small pile of snowballs behind the bins.

Jack ran up to the door and rang the bell aggressively, running back to the bins to crouch with Bobby.

There was a pause, then the door opened and Jerry, still in his pyjamas stepped onto his porch, yelling at who ever had rung his bell.

Jack and Bobby, in perfect unison, stood and hurled twin snow balls, the hardened ice balls striking him in the face and chest.

"HAHAAAAA WHITE DEATH JERRY!" Bobby yelled gleefully as Jerry stood in total shock, shivering as the snow began to melt through his clothes.

"OH!" Jerry yelled "You're dead Bobby, I'm gonna fuckin kill your ass!" He ran out into the snow, grabbing handfuls as he went and hurling them back at his brothers.

Bobby and Jack bombarded him mercilessly driving him to his feet and diving on him to rub snow on his head, shoving it down the back of his clothes.

"Get off get off you bastards!" Jerry laughed as Bobby and Jack rubbed hand fulls of snow on his face.

"We're gonna find a pick up game, you're in" Bobby told Jerry, pulling the slender black man to his feet.

"What? I just got out of bed!" Jerry told him, rubbing snow out of his hair.

"So go get dressed get some cheerios and get your ass in gear, we're gonna play!" Bobby laughed.

"It's nice to see you too Bobby" Jerry grinned, pulling his brother into a hug.

"good to hear it now go, get, your stuff!" Bobby gave Jerry a gentle shove in the direction of his house.

Jerry rolled his eyes but chuckled and jogged toward the house.

After enough time passed for him to have a shower, eat breakfast, explain the situation to his fiancé and gather his things, he emerged from the house.

"Alright, alright, lets get gone man I wanna beat some people!" Bobby whooped.

It didn't take long for the amped up brothers to find some people to take part in a blizzard borne Hockey Game. It became the Mercer brothers and some of Bobby's old friends against another group that the boys knew of old.

In a very short amount of time, the Mercers where up by ten goals and a member of the opposing team tackled Jack from behind and his head, on which he didn't wear a helmet, thumped on the floor.

Jack squeezed his eyes shut as the pain resonated through his head in waves that brought pained tears to his eyes.

He lay on the floor for a second, then rolled onto his front, got to his feet and skated after the guy, an African American kid named Lee, tackling him from behind, using his hockey stick to push Lee down. Jack turned Lee onto his back and grabbed his head, bouncing it on the floor, a seething rage boiling through him, blinding him to the severity of his actions. He was aware of being dragged backwards and swung wildly, hearing a yell as his fist connected.

Some one was on top of Jack, holding him down and he growled as some one stronger than him caught his wrists and held them against his chest.

"Jack, Jack!" Jerry was yelling into his face as Jack fought to get back to Lee.

"Jackie calm down" Bobby was trying to hold Jack down.

"Get that fucking animal off've the ice!" Some one yelled.

Bobby went from crouching to standing and tackled the speaker so hard the guy 'oofed' as he fell to the ground, the Michigan Mauler riding him down. In an instant a fight broke out on the ice and Jerry gave up trying to hold Jack down, realising there was simply no point. The five members of the Mercer team immediately sided with the brothers, taking on anyone who dared to come at them.

Jack went for Lee again, tackling the young man just as Lee managed to climb to his feet.

Lee managed to catch Jack in the tackle and pushed him off balance, sending Jack crashing to the ice. Jack rolled as Lee punched down in the place where Jack's head should have been, struggling to get to his feet as Lee came after him. All around him, people where fighting and Jack felt a rising, bubbling wicked glee. He gladly skated into Lee's tackle, ducking at the last minute and flipping Lee onto his back, spinning on the edge of his blades and diving on the youth, throwing punches as he went, a manic laugh escaping his lips as he fought.

* * *

"I am so sick of you three getting into fights" Evelyn snapped at Bobby and Jack as they sat side by side at the counter, trying to hide the grins that kept creeping over their lips.

"Jeremiah went home?" she asked them laying out witch hazel and cotton wool balls for them.

"Yeah" Bobby told her quietly.

Lizzie walked in the room, saw the sight of the bruised, beaten brothers and rolled her eyes "What did you do?" she asked.

"Lee started it" Jack stated "He tackled me too low"

"Has anything I've tried to teach you over the years ever actually stuck?" Evelyn asked.

"Tie your shoe laces" Jack smiled at her.

"Don't run with scissors" Bobby raised an eyebrow.

"Chew with ya mouth closed" Jack chuckled.

"Homework before chores, chores before fun" Bobby gave his mother a smile.

"Always be polite to ya PO" Jack snickered and Evelyn couldn't help but grin, happy to see Jack actually smiling for once.

"Clean your selves up" Evelyn threw a cloth at Bobby "I'll make some lunch, then you both can help Lizzie with her snowman" Evelyn smiled too sweetly at them.

"Gladly" Bobby shot at her with a grin.

"Really!" Lizzie squeaked.

"Course kid" Bobby smiled at her.

Jack picked up the bottle of witch hazel and the cotton wool and grabbed Bobby's jaw, holding his brothers face so he could dab witch hazel on the cut on Bobby's lip, the other scratches and cuts he had receives. Bobby did the same, tending Jack as Jack tended to him, both of them working easily and with a fraternal familiarity that made Evelyn smile.

They teased one another as they each winced at the various stings and pains that came as the witch hazel entered the wounds. "Quit bein a little fairy" Bobby scolded.

"I'm just copyin you bitch" Jack shot back.

"Ma did you hear that?" Bobby asked, moving to stand behind Jack so he could see the small cut on the back of his head.

As Bobby dabbed the cut with one hand, Jack pulled the other hand forward over Jacks shoulder, examining the scratches and broken skin on Bobby's knuckles.

"You woulda thought your knuckles would be callused by now" Jack told him.

"You mean they're not?" Bobby frowned, pressing on the wound a little harder than necessary to see if it was just bruised or fractured.

"You got baby soft skin, what do you do, moisturise" Jack laughed as Evelyn began to lay out sandwiches, sodas and chips.

"Shut up" Bobby jabbed the bruise hard enough that Jack, still holding on to Bobby's hand, bent his brothers finger back.

"Ow, hey!" Bobby snatched his hand back and sat back down in his seat as Jack picked up his soda and popped the ring pull.

"That's what you get" Jack sing songed, grinning.

"Ma, will you tell him, he tried to kill me Ma" Bobby put on a nasally voice.

"Quit your bitchin" Evelyn covered Lizzie's ears as she said the last.

"I heard that" Lizzie smiled.

"Well then excuse me" Evelyn told her.

The phone rang as Jack picked idly at his chips, and Bobby slid off his stool to answer it.

"Mercer residence" Bobby said, turning his back and unwittingly giving Jack the opportunity to shake up Bobby's soda can vigorously.

Lizzie saw him but he gave her the 'sh' motion, grinning conspiratorially.

"Jackie, its for you" Bobby told his brother.

Jack took the proffered phone "Yeah?" he asked.

"Hey buddy boy" Hooks voice came over the mouthpiece and Jack casually walked out of the kitchen.

"Hey whats up man?" he asked.

"Got a call from Toby, he liked you man…got another job for you tonight if you want it, I can set you up with some primo coke if you want it" Hook sounded like he was eating something and the noise was bugging Jack.

"Stop fucking chewing man, give me the address" Jack told him.

He found a pen in his pocket and scribbled down the address on his palm as Hook read it aloud. "Be there for nine, this guy's…a little aggressive, so watch yourself" Hook told him.

"Whatever" Jack told him, hanging up.

"Who was that" Bobby asked as Jack walked back into the kitchen.

"Buddy of mine setting something up for tonight" Jack told him, mostly truthfully.

"It's Sunday, it's a school night" Evelyn told him.

"Ma look out side, I think it's safe to say we're gonna have a snow day tomorrow" Jack stated, trying not to stare as Bobby reached for his soda can,

"What time will you be going out?" Evelyn asked.

"Nine" Jack told her, his eyes on the can.

"For how long?"

"A couple hours"

"Alright, but no later than eleven okay?" Evelyn frowned at Jack, following the direction of his gaze.

She saw Bobby starting to pop the can, realised what Jack had done and was fast enough to pull Lizzie to a safe distance before Bobby broke the seal and pressurised soda spurted out, covering Bobby from head to foot in soda.

"Oh you son of a BITCH!" Bobby yelled as Jack roared with laughter, actually falling to his hands and knees clutching at his stomach.

"That's not funny Jack, this is my best jacket!" Bobby snapped angrily.

"That's sad man, you sound like a girl, you sound like la vida loca" Jack laughed.

"Ma, I have to kill Jack" Bobby shook his head, running at his brother.

Jack, still laughing, let Bobby tackle him and lay on the ground as Bobby straddled him, punching his upper arm repeatedly.

"Dead arm ya little fucker!" Bobby yelled.

"You hit like a girl!" Jack chuckled.

"Bobby let him up" Evelyn called half heartedly.

"He aint listenin" Lizzie told her.

"You gonna make me hurt you more?" Bobby asked, leaning forward to knuckle Jack's head.

"Hurt me _more?_ You haven't hurt me yet!" Jack yelled.

Bobby stood and grabbed Jack by the ankles, dragging him through the kitchen and out the back door, pushing him onto the thick snow. Jack was laughing the entire time, even as Bobby closed the door and locked it, leaving Jack in the snow.

Lizzie emerged from the house a minute later, carrying Jack's coat and zipping up her own.

"You gotta think up a name for your snowman, then we know what kind of snow man he'll be" Jack told her, pulling his coat on with a grateful smile.

"Oscar" Lizzie told him "Like the awards"

"That's a pretty awesome idea" Jack raised an eyebrow "Alright gat your gloves on and lets get to it, -Bobby, get your lazy ass out here and help!" He yelled the last.

Bobby emerged wearing a new, dry coat and picked Lizzie up affectionately, throwing her over one shoulder.

"Jack where's Lizzie?" he asked as Lizzie giggled.

"I don't know man" Jack played along.

"Ma we lost Lizzie!" Bobby told Evelyn as she stood in the door way watching them.

"Well damn it, I better go call social services tell em we lost another one!" Evelyn smiled.

As Bobby spun holding Lizzie, Jack passed the girl a snowball which she neatly dropped down the back of Bobby's clothes.

Bobby actually squealed and hurriedly shrugged Lizzie off his shoulder, into a snow drift, yelping as he tried to fish the snow out of his clothes.

Jack helped Lizzie up and they ignored Bobby's vague threats of retaliation and set to work on the snow man, the powdery white snow fluttering around them.

* * *

Jack felt the buzz of heat rush up his nose, through his skull as the cocaine entered his system, coursing through him in a white hit flash of ecstasy.

He lay back on the couch in Ray Markhams den, his eyes fluttering closed as he rode out the buzz, sniffing almost constantly, a layer of sweat covering his skin. It had been two months since his first Job for Hook and with each client, Hook gave Jack better and better stuff. Ray was a semi regular who preferred it when Jack was as out of it as he could get.

"There you go" Ray smiled, lounging beside Jack, stroking the boys hair gently.

"D….don't" Jack brushed his hand away, turning his head to the side as Ray sidled closer.

"Alright" Ray withdrew his hand, already knowing enough about Jack to know to move away if Jack told you to move away

He slid his hand down Jack's arm and held it aloft, touching the scars and cuts there, all of which had quadrupled in number since that first job.

"So angry" He murmured, staring down at the semi conscious Jack "Why are you so angry?" he asked.

Jack came back to himself enough that his eyes fluttered open and he gave Ray a look, an empty, dark look.

He leaned forward and snorted another line of the cocaine Hook had given him, rubbing furiously at his nose as his head snapped back. The hit didn't have the desired effect.

He sat, riding the high again as Ray tried to move closer, but Jack pushed him away more forcefully "Get off me Ray" Jack muttered, "Don't fucking touch me" he rubbed at his eyes, wanting very suddenly to be home.

Jack stood, unsteadily blinking as if having trouble with the light.

He looked down at his shaking hands, his dirty, bitten down nails, ran a hand through his lank, greasy hair.

"I don't want to be here" he whispered to himself, "I don't want to be here" he repeated even louder.

"Say what?" Ray asked him.

"I…this isn't right, I shouldn't be here" Jack rubbed his eye again, the sudden realisation that he didn't want to be where he was, be doing what he had been doing brought tears to his eyes and he grabbed at his hair, pulling it hard enough that it hurt.

"I'm outta here man" he shook his head, walking forward to grab his jacket.

Ray caught his arm suddenly, an odd smile on hid face "You're not going any where Jack, I paid Hook already, just finish out the night, then you can go" he said calmly.

"Let the fuck go of my arm" Jack told him.

"Are you gonna finish up the night?" Ray asked.

"No" Jack told him "Look I get high so I can do this shit and not care, but guess what? Its not workin anymore, it bothers me that I'm here so I'm gone" he tried to pull his arm back but Ray tightened his grip.

"Jack, I don't give a fuck how you feel. I paid for a service and I'm gonna get it" He stated.

"Not from me" Jack twisted his arm to the side and his hand slipped easily through Ray's hand.  
Grabbing his coat, Jack turned and headed for the door, too wrapped up in his own thoughts to hear Ray move. Ray was effeminate, but he was big, muscular, and taller than Jack, and when he grabbed the back of Jack's hair and slammed him forward into the wall, there was nothing Jack could do to stop it.

"I said you're not leaving" Ray hissed into Jack's ear, pressing himself against Jack's back.

"Get off me" Jack growled, fear flooding through him in a wash that made his knees go weak.

"No" Ray said simply.

Jack reached back to try and grab at Ray's hand in his hair but Ray caught Jack's skinny wrists in one massive hand, holding them against the back of Jack's skull with one hand. His other hand, he slid under Jack's t-shirt, running his hand over Jack's skin.

Jack bucked and tried to push away from the wall with his legs but Ray made a sweeping motion with one leg, hooking Jack's leg with his own so that Jack was off balance. Some how, Ray used this stance to pin Jack to the wall as he leaned forward and whispered in Jack's ear "I've been waiting for you to get like this, I like it hen there's a struggle"

Jack tried to yell but Ray wordlessly slammed Jack's head against the wall, dazing him. He ran his hand over Jack's skin again, sliding his hand low on Jack's stomach. He let his hand hover at the top of Jack's jeans, seeming to savour it as he pushed himself against Jack's back.

"Don't" Jack whispered, tears beginning to flow down his face "Please don't"

Ray chuckled and let one finger run along the top of Jack's jeans, his laugh turning cruel as Jack shuddered.

As he slid his hand even lower, Jack very suddenly managed to kick off the wall, shoving them both backwards hard.

Ray fell, but kept his grip on one of Jack's wrists, dragging the fifteen year old down with him. Jack was growling ferally, trying to pull away from Ray but Ray yanked Jack forward and slapped him across the face, splitting Jack's lip. Jack barely reacted though, throwing a punch at Ray. It connected and Ray dazedly let go of Jack's hand suddenly enough that Jack fell backwards onto his rear, landing with a yelp of surprise. Jack turned and ran but Ray, angered now, pushed himself to his feet and staggered after him, running through the house. He caught Jack at the door and simply grabbed the back of his jacket, swinging him around and sending Jack crashing into a bookcase. Jack hit the floor but still tried to crawl away as Ray walked over and aimed a kick at Jack's ribs that connected with a sickening crunch.

Jack cried out in agony and Ray dragged him to his feet, pushing him back against the wall almost playfully. He stepped up close as Jack fixed him with a truly murderous glare.

"I'm gonna fuck you" Ray grinned smugly at Jack "And there's nothing you can do to stop me" he cocked his head to one side as Jack weakly tried to push away from the wall.

Ray smugly stepped back and Jack threw another solid punch and ran but even as he reeled from the blow, Ray grabbed Jack and slammed him against the wall face first again, twisting Jack's arms and staggering him so Jack really couldn't run away. He hurriedly unbuckled his belt and fly and after bouncing Jack's head against the wall once more, he dragged Jack back toward the den, yanking at Jack's jeans as he went.

* * *

Jack slowly opened the front door and stepped into the house, every part of his body aching as he pushed the door closed behind him. He had stopped shaking hours ago, he didn't have the energy even for that after Ray- he squeezed his eyes closed, stopping the thought in its tracks as he listened hard for the sounds of the family. They where in the kitchen, so he wordlessly headed toward the stairs.

"Jackie is that you?" he heard Jerry call "Come say hi!"

"I gotta wash up" Jack called back hoarsely, flinching as he thought he felt a hand caress his skin.

He hunched over his stomach as nausea suddenly flowed through him and ran up the stairs, slamming the bathroom door behind him, panting as his stomach threatened to heave. The feeling passed and stared at himself in the mirror over the sink.

"Stupid" he told his own reflection "Stupid fuck…what did you think would happen?" he looked at himself in the mirror, taking in his cut lip, the jagged cut over his eyebrow, the bruises on one cheek where he had hit the wall.

"What else was he gonna think huh?" he sneered at himself in the mirror, loathing every inch of skin he could see "You went there for one reason and one reason only dumb fuck, you got what you fucking deserved. You where made for this" he told himself "Your dad knew it" he whispered "He knew you where only fucking good for one thing you stupid, stupid prick and that's all you're ever going to be good for. You better learn to love it" he spat.

He was gripping the sides of the sink so badly his hands hurt as he opened them and stormed from the bathroom to his bedroom, locking his door behind him.

He pulled off his jacket and dropped it on the ground, staring at his own reflection o the full length mirror he had in one corner. He turned so he could see where his jeans where torn on the seam where Ray had pulled at them. "Stupid prick" he called himself.

He rolled up the long sleeves of his sweater and stared at the cuts and scars there, the urge to let the badness of what had happened out with a cut filling him so suddenly and strongly that he turned his stereo on to full blast and tipped the mirror over, shattering the reflective glass. He kicked the frame aside and picked up a jagged piece of glass, gripping it tight enough that the edges cut into his fingers and palm. He held the edge to his wrist, preparing to cut across then stopped, realising that all the badness from Ray would be too much for small cuts across his wrist. He re angled the make shift blade, pressing it to his skin, pushing down, that first swell of blood and pain bringing him a peace he could never have found with out it. He pulled the blade down, one quick swipe, marvelling at the amount of badness that flowed out. Transferring the shard he cut his other wrist, some tiny part of his mind telling him he had killed him self. But he didn't care. He slumped to the floor, leaning back against his bed, the mirror shard dropping from his hands as the blood poured from his wrists. He heard, on the edge of hearing, over the heavy rock music that played, the thump of some one at his door, and a distorted noise that could have been a yell.

Watching his blood flow out of him Jack smiled slightly, realising a promise that had been made to him years ago was finally coming true. He had been told he would never be hurt again, and now, he was ensuring that that was the case.

His head began to pound painfully and he let himself slump to one side, feeling numbness creeping up his arms and the tugging feeling of sleep behind his eyes.

'_I haven't slept through the night since I was a kid'_ he thought, detachedly, '_finally, I can sleep like a regular person_'

He happily gave himself up to sleep snickering to him self that Ray would have to find some one else from Hook. As he fell into the blissfully empty darkness, Jack relished the feeling of being, at last, free of the darkness inside him.


	11. Chapter 11

I know i said it would be a while but this was clawing its way out of my head, plusi got some of my work done quicker than i thought. You guys should be grateful im an insomniac.Since i'm going home for the weekend the day after tommorrow this really will be the last update for a few days, and im sorry its short but its sweet and to the point. Oh, BTW, for people who have been askin(ALY!) The councillor who scared little Jackie when he first got rescued from Amelia's house?She was eaten by a bear. Just so you know.

Disclaimers: Language, lots of violence, talk about rape and such things. Hey did y'all know the C word is a spelling error on Word! It is, so the laguage isnt as bad as it could be but you can see what direction i was heading.

I dont own any of the characters etc blah copywright cakes.

The next chappie will be all jack all the time, this is just to tide you over( may have said this already but i feel like a dealer dishing ot the goods!) until i can make a bigger start on Jacks recovery! Theres going to be some morbidity and some OC's and some 'fun' to be had there so, read on and enjoy my lovelies!xxxxx

* * *

Jack lay in the hospital bed, staring blankly at the wall opposite his bed, his mouth set in a grim, angry line. There where thick bandages on his wrists, more covering the wounds on his face and body. He had been tied down to the bed and heavily sedated but was conscious enough to be angry he had been saved.

Bobby was in a seat beside Jack's bed, content with not talking, but refusing to leave his brothers side. It wasn't as if he could sleep. Every time Bobby closed his eyes, he saw behind his eye lids, the image that had burned itself into his memory; Jack, slumped over on his side, smashed mirror shards surrounding him, blood, everywhere, bright red, pouring from the twin wounds on Jack's wrists, Jack's skin grey. Evelyn had sent Bobby up to ask Jack to turn down the music but Jack had seemed to ignore Bobby's initial knocks, and then Jack had heard the mirror smash and had started pounding on the door, yelling for his mother and Jerry to come and help. They had managed to open the door to find Jack as he had been and Jerry had instantly run to call an ambulance while Evelyn and Bobby had rushed into the room to try and help in some way.

That had been awful enough. But the doctors at the hospital had told them that Jack had signs of continued self harm, and that he had been raped. The last had struck like a physical blow as the doctor explained that there where more signs of molestation, as if Jack had been continually abused. They had also found drugs, cocaine, amphetamines, weed in his system.

Evelyn too had been sedated and was sleeping off the effects of the pill in the family room down the hall. Jerry was phoning home to check in with his fiancé, asking her to track down Angel.

"You gotta talk some time Jackie" Bobby told his little brother.

Jack remained silent, unresponsive, glaring at the wall.

"What the fuck have you been doin? You been hookin?" Bobby asked quietly.

Bobby asked "That guy who's been callin, he your pimp?" he leaned forward slightly in his seat.

"Where can I find him Jackie?" Bobby asked his brother "You tell me and I'll fix it" he stated.

"Don't tell me then" Bobby rose from his seat and "I'll just go find out on my own and we'll do right by you Jack, I swear, your big brothers, we're gonna fix this" he promised.

He stormed out of the room and ran right into Jerry who was heading back.

"We cant track Angel down yet, but she said she'd keep trying" he said, speaking of his fiancé, "Where you goin?"

"This guy Hook who's been callin the house, he's the one that's been setting Jack up with these…guys, I'm sure of it, who's that kid, Gordie, we gotta talk to him" Bobby explained "He's a buddy of Jack's from school, I'll bet even money he got Jack into shit with this fucking guy"

Jerry spun on his heel as Bobby barrelled past him, heading for the elevator doors.

"What are we gonna do, intimidate a fifteen year old?" Jerry asked.

"Yes" Bobby said.

"Alright" Jerry nodded.

* * *

Gordie was on his way to school when the muscle car pulled up beside him and a slender black youth leaned out of the passenger window. Gordie immediately recognised Jerry Mercer and cursed as the car stopped and Bobby climbed out of the drivers side, leaning on the roof of the car and fixing Gordie with a glare.

"Where's your boy Hook?" Jerry asked simply.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Gordie lied.

Bobby sniffed and walked around the front of the car, grabbing Gordie's arm and shoving him back against the car "Jack's hurt cos of Hook Gordie, tell us where he'll be" Jerry asked as the still silent Bobby did an impressive job of threatening Gordie with violence without ever saying a word.

"I don't know-" Gordie started to say but Bobby grabbed his face in one hand and squeezed, the tips of his fingers pressing into Gordie's skin painfully.

"Gordie he'll kill you" Jerry stated.

"Hook'll kill me" Gordie retorted with some difficulty.

"I can assure you, nothing Hook could do to you will compare with what we will do to you" Jerry said, and his very quiet voice was more frightening than any yelling would have been.

Gordie hesitated, then gave them Hook's address, begging them not to tell Hook who had given him up.

Bobby released him with a shove and climbed back into the car, throwing it into gear and tearing out of the neighbourhood. He came to the project buildings where Hook lived and spotted a kid walking along the street. "Hey, where's Hook?" Bobby snapped at the boy.

Wordlessly, the kid pointed across the street and Bobby looked over and saw who the boy was pointing at, the scruffy man known as Hook.

Bobby stopped the car in an angry squeal of brakes and threw his door open before the car had fully stopped. Jerry walked to the trunk and yanked it open, retrieving twin crowbars and tossing one to his brother.

They strode across the street and quickly and quietly came up behind Hook, each taking him buy the arms and turning him around, frogmarching him toward a nearby alley way before he had time to react.

"What the fuck!" He snapped, trying and failing to escape them.

"You know Jack Mercer?" Jerry asked quietly.

"What, no, get off me!" Hook yelled.

"You know him, you been giving him drugs and you've been pimping him out" Bobby told him, his voice seething in anger.

"Oh and who the fuck are you?" Hook sneered.

"I'm Bobby Mercer, that's who the fuck I am" Bobby growled, swinging the crowbar as Hook tried to book.

It impacted with Hook's knee with a solid and sickening crunch and Hook let out a pained howl. Jerry and Bobby supported him and dragged him around the corner into the dank alley way, dropping him on the ground. "Where did Jack go last night?" Bobby asked.

"F…Fuck you" Hook managed to snap, clutching at his leg, tears and spittle running down his face.

Bobby hit him again, on the ankle as Jerry ducked behind the guy and held his crowbar across the mans throat, tightly enough to restrain him but not to choke him right away. Hook shrieked as his ankle shattered, trying to move his legs away, but Jerry held him steady.

"I want the addresses of every son of a bitch that ever laid a hand on him, and I want the name of the guy he saw last night, I want it now you piece of shit" Bobby yelled.

"I cant!" Hook gasped.

Bobby brought the crowbar down on his ankle a second time, turning to a group of curious kids who had appeared at the mouth of the alley "Fuck off" he snarled viciously, faking as if he would attack the kids until they scattered.

He turned back to Hook and grabbed his damaged ankle, squeezing it mercilessly.

"Give me the names" Bobby roared.

Hook moaned piteously and shakily stuck a hand in his pocket. Jerry reacted instantly, swinging his crow bar and cracking it against Hook's arm as Hook withdrew his hand. A scruffy note book fell from his hand as he squealed again and rolled over.

"Coulda been a gun" Jerry shrugged at Bobby's raised eyebrow.

"Good call" Bobby said sincerely, snatching the notebook form the ground.

"The ones with a 'J'" Hook whimpered "They're who Jack's seen…last night, his name was Ray Markham, his address is in there" he managed.

Bobby aimed a kick at Hook's ankle, and another at his face, breaking his nose. Jerry turned him onto his side so he wouldn't swallow his own blood and leaned close to him . "Don't go near Jack Mercer again. Don't sell drugs to kids again. We will kill you if you do" he said simply.

Bobby hawked and spat on Hook, zipping his jacket as he walked away without another word.

Jerry took the note book and flipped through it, finding the address before they where even in the car.

"We gotta pick up some things" Bobby told him as they climbed into the car

"Is Ray walkin away from this?" Jerry asked as he lay his crowbar across his legs.

Keying the ignition, Bobby shook his head.

Jerry nodded "Good"

* * *

Ray opened the door to the polite knocking and frowned down at the two young men standing before him, one white, about 5'9 muscular in that boxer way under his jacket, cute in an angry, intense kind of way, the other a slender black man with a warm, kind, handsome face, his clothes looking a little rumpled as if he'd had them on for while. "Sir" the white kid smiled sweetly "Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour?"

Ray's smile froze in place as he realised they where Witnesses but they where cute enough that he was willing to entertain their company for a little while. After last night he wasn't sure he's be seeing Jack again and this pair had that coiled intensity to them, as if they where holding something in. Ray wouldn't have been surprised to have stumbled upon a sweet little closeted pair just begging to be brought Out.

"You know, I have been meaning to look into a change in…lifestyle recently. Why don't you boys come on in" he smiled at the, feeling the ache in his jaw where Jack had managed to hit him the previous night.

"What thank you sir" the black youth said, stepping into the house.

"What happened to your face sir, and your house, I hope nothing serious!" the white kid asked, his eyes widening as he looked around the room.

Ray spotted a bloody spot on the wall where he had bounced Jack's head off of it and angled his body so it was partially hiddne, motioning for the boys to follow him into the kitchen. "A friend of mine with some, alcohol abuse problems came over last night asking for a hand out. I tried to get him to stay, pray with me but he uh, he got agitated and wrecked the place…tragic really…maybe if you'd been around you could have helped him see the light?" Ray lied smoothly as the boys walked into the kitchen.

He cursed silently as he saw Jack's wallet sitting on the table. "What's this?" the black youth asked, stepping around Ray to pick up the wallet. He flipped it open and looked at some of the photos within. "Your family?" the kid asked kindly, handing the wallet to Ray.

Ray took it, looking down at the photo's remembering very suddenly how Jack had begged, how scared the boy had been. He repressed a grin and pushed thoughts of how he could use the photos later to the back of his mind for the time being and examined the pictures briefly. Something caught his eye but he wasn't sure why as he looked back up at the young man, "Uh, yeah, my son and his friends" Ray looked back down at the photos and realisation dawned in the form of a cold, hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach.

He looked back up at the black youth to see the kind smile drain away like blood from a wound, those honest eyes harden like glass.

He turned to look at the white kid, registering too late that both men had kept at least one hand behind their back since they had walked in the house and as Bobby Mercer with drew his concealed crow bar, Ray knew why. He tried to run but both Bobby and Jerry swung at him at the same time, Bobby taking out Ray's legs from one side while Jerry cracked Ray's ribs from the other.

Ray fell to the ground, pain tearing through his body but unable to scream for help. Bobby crouched near his head, plucking the wallet from his hand and pocketing it "We're Jack's big brothers, I'm Bobby, this is Jerry" he said in that deceptively soft voice of his "And you're gonna die"

Ray gasped, tasting blood in his mouth as Jerry and Bobby set to work, pulling on black leather gloves from out of their pockets. They hoisted Ray to his feet, using a tea towel to wipe the blood off his chin. Bobby ran to bring the car around, parking itin Ray's garageand Ray, in a detached part of his brain marvelled at how the two young men worked so quickly and efficiently. They dumped him in their car and disappeared back inside his house, absent for long enough that he knew they must have been setting something up. When they came back, they carried bin bag and an old duffel bag and smelled strongly of bleach and cleaning products. Ray realised they had cleaned his house, probably tidied it just enough to look casual, natura and had most likely packed a bag with some clothes to make it seem like he had gone on vacation.

They through the bags in the back with him and drove calmly out of Ray's neighbourhood. "People….will see" Ray gasped, something in his chest whistling as he spoke.

"Stolen car" Jerry said.

"Gonna burn it and everything in it" Bobby added.

"Me?" Ray rasped.

"Eventually, we got plans for you" Jerry told him, laughing out loud.

"Tell us what you did" Bobby said.

"What?" Ray asked.

"Tell us what you did to Jack. You're dead anyway, you may as well" Jerry stated, turning in his seat to watch Ray.

"I didn't do-" Ray started to say but Jerry leaned down casually and tapped Ray's damaged leg, causing him to writhe in pain.

"Alright!" Ray hissed "He wanted to leave…he was high…I had already paid Hook so I told Jack to just finish up the night then he could go but he refused" Ray told them, enjoying the memories despite his situation. If he was gonna go he could go on a high note. "He tried to leave but I didn't let him…I beat on him some, and that little punk was asking for it. He's been coming round here for weeks" Ray sneered at Jerry "He blows me, that little faggot, he loves it" he coughed painfully "Nothing I did last night was something he didn't want and I gave it to him, and I loved every second of it. How do you like that thought huh? I fucked your baby brother you little prick and there's nothing you can do to change that" Jerry had the crowbar in his hand again from seemingly out of nowhere and he brought it down heavily on Ray's chest, silencing him.

They drove for what, to Ray, felt like hours before the car finally pulled to a halt. It was very simple. Bobby and Jerry dragged Ray from the car and went to work with their crowbars, their fists, their feet. He had enough time to register with dismay that they where in the middle of God's nowhere. They rained down blow after blow as the skies above them parted and rain began to pour down until it was hard to tell if the water on their faces was rain or the tears that had sprung from their eyes at some stage in the beating.

When one became tired, the other would take over with methodical brutality until finally they both lost control and began screaming as they pummelled Ray into a quivering, gasping, bloody heap on the floor. Panting, Bobby reached under his jacket and withdrew two guns, handing one to Jerry. Ray, through swollen, bloodied eyes stared up at them, trying to form words through his cracked lips and shattered teeth.

With cold, dead eyes the brothers stared back at him. They shot him once each in the crotch, barely reacting as he managed to gather enough air the shriek wordlessly. Two more shots in his stomach stole the air from his lungs so all he could do was grimace with pain. Two more in the heart and they stood over him while he bled out, watching him suffer, making sure they where the last thing he saw before finally, he died.

Without a word, the brothers loaded his body into the car. They withdrew two tightly wrapped bin bags from the trunk and laid them on the ground, feet from both the car and the blood soaked ground where Ray had lain. Stripping down, they threw everything they had worn into the car and took another large bag from the boot. This one contained several canisters of petrol which they emptied into the car, throwing the used containers in with all the other things to be disposed of.

Using an old match book they lit the car on fire and watched as the petrol ignited and the car began to burn. They tore open the other bags, dressing quickly in the extra clothes they had brought along, throwing the remaining bags into the flames. With barely a backwards glance they began to walk away from the fire, letting the rain soak them, rinsing away any evidence that could remain. Behind them, something in the car exploded in a 'whoosh' of igniting gases and the screech of rending metal.

They walked silently until the car was far, far behind the, automatically huddling close against the cold. After two hours they reached a certain point in the non descript road and after half an hour, a car pulled up beside them and they climbed in.

Sophi, Angels sometime girlfriend glanced back at the rain soaked brothers and wordlessly handed them towels, bags of fast food and a cardboard mug of coffee each, from the small collection she had on the seat beside her.

"Is it done?" she asked the as she began to drive.

She glanced in the rearview mirror, saw their eyes and gave a curt nod as she got her response.

As well as the silent 'yes' the looks the brothers shared said in clear tones 'You don't mess with a Mercer'


	12. Chapter 12

Sorry this took so long, i was stupidly busy!

Thanks to all the reviewers again, i still love you guys, er, Disclaimers, language and content, i dont own any of the Four Brothers blah blah copywritecakes blah blee.

Erm, i kinda got the feelin that some people thought i went the wrong way in having Bobby and Jerry kill Jack's attacker,but tbh, and since i wrote it hehe, i if you look at how they reacted to Evelyn being killed, to me, it makes perfect sense for them to react how i had them do, so to the nay sayers, it fits guys, it makes sense!

But here it is R+R, it might be a wee while again before i post, just Uni work see, so dont be mad with me!  
Love ya guys xxx

* * *

Bobby and Jerry Mercer walked into Jacks hospital room and wordlessly lay Jacks wallet down on the table beside his bed.

Jack's eyes slowly tracked to the wallet and focused on it, his eyes barely changing as he remembered where he had lost it. His reaction was a tiny, almost imperceptible twitch of the skin around his eyes.

"All for you" Jerry whispered.

"He'll never hurt anybody again" Bobby muttered "Especially not you"

Jack's eyes where fixed on the wallet, still eerily blank but he gave a minute half blink that Bobby and Jerry took for confirmation of his understanding and visibly relaxed, the tension that had been flowing through them simply draining away as if some one had turned a tap on. Dropping heavily into their seats, Bobby and Jerry leaned back to look out of the small window onto the room to see a tired looking Evelyn speaking with one of the doctors.

* * *

"A clinic?" Evelyn parroted the doctor, rubbing her forehead as if trying to rub her muddled thoughts into clarity.

"A rehabilitation clinic, to help him deal with his drug abuse, the…attack, and the emotional problems he's been having, discover the reasons behind his attempted suicide" the doctor said quietly.

"You want to put him in a mental institution" Evelyn said bluntly.

"A rehabilitation clinic" the doctor stressed.

"You want to put my son in the nut house!" Evelyn's voice dropped to a low angry hiss as she stepped closer to the doctor "My son is not crazy"

"No ones saying he is Miss Mercer, it's just the policy when it comes to kids like Jack, he's been self harming, he's been selling himself to men, taking drugs, and he tried to take his own life" the doctor shook his head "He would have had to stay there for a month if it had just been the drugs anyway, but with everything else that happened…my colleagues and I think he would benefit from a…longer stay" the doctor sounded genuinely sympathetic, keeping his voice low and soft.

"I don't know" Evelyn whispered "He's my son, I don't want to have to send him away"

"Miss Mercer, he has been all but catatonic since he was brought in, he hasn't said word one to any one about anything…he's in shock, he's traumatised. We know he has a lot of problems because of what he's already been through as a child…he needs extended psychological help" the man ducked his head so Evelyn couldn't avoid meeting his eyes.

"Miss Mercer, I know you're worried Jack's going to think you're abandoning him…but he wont get better without treatment and he wont get that back at home" he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, "This is not your failing, you have to understand this, this was done _to_ Jack, and to you. We think he may be suffering from some bipolar disorders, he needs help" he gave her the faintest of sympathetic smiles "Please trust me on this?" he asked.

"What do I say to him?" Evelyn asked.

"You just tell him it's to get him help" The doctor told her.

"He'll hate me"

"He'll understand"

Evelyn nodded and walked silently away from him, toward her son's room, closing the door behind her.

The doctor watched as she sat beside his bed and took his hand, which was still tied down to the bed.

Jack tried to pull his hand way but Evelyn gripped his hand in hers as she spoke. The Doctor, whose name was Paul frowned sadly as the other young men sat up in their seats, frowning angrily at what Evelyn was saying.

As Paul watched, Jack turned to stare at his mother, giving her the darkest look. Paul grimaced, glad that Evelyn didn't see it as Jack laid his head back against his pillow and closed his eyes, letting his hand in Evelyn's go totally limp, shutting himself off from her even as she touched him.

Paul saw Evelyn notice and with draw her hand sadly, settling back into her seat as Jack tuned back into whatever internal world he was occupying when he wasn't all there and switched off his family.

* * *

"Now we'll come and visit you once you detox Jackie, okay?" Evelyn was asking Jack as he was wheeled in a wheel chair to the waiting ambulance that would transport him to the 'rehabilitation clinic', a place near the city named St Patrick's Centre for Rehabilitation.

She reached out to lovingly touch his face and he turned his head away slowly.

"Hey, Jackie, this is to help you" Bobby crouched on the other side of Jack, directly in Jack's line of sight.

Jack's eyes slipped to the side and went blank as he slipped back into that internal hidey hole. Bobby sighed as Jack's took on his thousand yard stare.

"Angel couldn't get back but he's gonna write you" Jerry tried, "You can get letters up there" he made his voice sympathetic.

Jack was gone though, not hearing or seeing anything around him. His face darkened and one of his hands curled slowly into a fist so tight it seemed his knuckles would burst through his skin. What ever he was seeing in his head was something awful.

The orderly pushing the chair gave a small, polite cough and the Mercers drew back reluctantly from the unresponsive Jack. The orderly picked up a sports bag and hefted it onto one shoulder. The bag was Jacks, containing the clothes and few personal items Evelyn had packed for him.

"I love you sweetie" Evelyn whispered, her voice thickening with tears, "I do, I really love you" she began to sob as Bobby and Jerry embraced her, watching the orderly move away with Jack had wasn't hearing a word being said.

"We shouldn't be doing this to him" she whispered to her two remaining sons "It isn't fair"

"Ma I hate this more than you do but you know as well as I do it's to help him" Bobby said, his voice barely restraining his anger.

"The bastard who hurt my son will suffer, God owes me that much at least" Evelyn whispered, burying her head in Jerry's shoulder, missing the dark looks her sons exchanged over the top of her head.

* * *

In the back of the ambulance, the orderly who would be transporting Jack secured Jack's bed and fitted him with an IV. Calmly, he explained to Jack that is was policy to sedate patients during transport, his voice quiet and soft as he spoke. "It wont put you right out, you're just going to feel sort of….lazy for a little while" the man smiled kindly.

The doors to the ambulance stood open and a woman in her thirties with long dark red hair pulled back into a thick braid climbed in, closing the doors behind her, smiling at the orderly. "Hey Jorge" she handed him a Styrofoam mug of coffee and sat beside Jack's bed, ducking her head to try and see into his eyes. She had her own cup of coffee in one hand, and a thick manila folder tucked under one arm.

"Jack?" she said, her voice clear and loud "I'm Dr Laura White, call me Laura okay? I work up at the Centre; I'm going to be working closely with you in your time with us. I'm here just today to ride along with you and Jorge, let you get used to seeing a lot of me around…" She trailed off as Jack finally looked at her and something in his eyes; a terrible maturity that no boy his age should possess stopped her mid speech. "You won't go for the bullshit will you?" she asked bluntly. "Okay then I'll be frank, I'm here so that if you make an accusation against Jorge, say, for molesting you, there's a witness to say if it was true or not" She stated.

She buckled her self into a seat beside Jorge as a third person started the engine and they pulled out.

"You into sports Jack?" Laura asked as the ambulance pulled out of the parking lot and into the street.

Jack stared pointedly at her and she gave him an apologetic grin. "I've read your file. I know you play hockey. And I know you're into writing music, art…you can do all of that at St Patrick's, make it apart of your therapy" she told him.

Jack blinked lethargically and redirected his gaze, retreating yet again.

"Charming" Laura said brittley.

"He hasn't spoken since he was brought in, comes in and out of catatonic states" Jorge reminded her.

"Heavy sedation and restraints too" Laura added, reading from the folder "he wont let any one touch him when he's sober it seems" she raised an eye brow as she flicked back through Jack's file "Fuck" she breathed.

She looked up at Jack, sadness in her dark brown eyes "Well done for making it this far kid" she muttered.

For the rest of the journey, which took close to an hour, Jorge and Laura read through Jack's file, commenting and making personal notes as Jack lay half dozing in the bed.

When the ambulance pulled into the long driveway that led to the old house, Jorge gave injected something into the IV in Jack's arm "This'll perk you up a little" he explained.

Laura tidied the folder away and peered out of the window at St Patrick's. The Centre was housed in an old house which had been a boarding school way back when. The house stood in a small, private piece of land; just large enough to hold a thick copse of trees which at the moment, where dead, their branches bare.

The green landscape seemed dull under the heavy, late winter sky and as a light, bluster snow began to fall, the main house looked grim and dark.

Jorge was encouraging Jack to sit up and move around as they pulled up outside the house and the driver went around to the back of the truck to open the doors. As Jorge, picked up Jack's bag, Laura helped Jack who was operating on autopilot to step down from the ambulance.

"I just now realised how much this place looks like something out of a movie" Laura noted, giving a Jack a look to see if he reacted to her joke.

He was staring out across the long lawn, his eyes fixed on nothing in particular and Laura sighed, gently guiding him toward the front doors.

Laura had to buzz in on an intercom, something she noticed made Jack flinch ever so slightly when the door in front of them hummed electronically as it opened.

She walked him in and began to go through the paper work as Jorge took Jack's bag through to a separate room and go through the contents, removing anything potentially dangerous.

Before long, the paper work was completed and Laura looked up at Jack who she noticed with a slight shudder, had remained unsettlingly still while she worked through the documents. "You want the tour?" she asked him.

Jack gave her a blink and Laura took it as his affirmation "Alright then" she stood, walking briskly out of the room, waiting for him to follow her.

He did, his long legs carrying him after her easily as she walked through the house. "Well, there are obviously the offices, they're near the door but that door is a heavy duty security door with a magnetic lock, so don't think of trying to run away. Um, over here is one of the group therapy rooms" Laura pointed to what had been a classroom back when the house was a school, noticing that Jack's eyes flicked around constantly.

She paused, thinking he was panicking but she realised he was simply taking stock of his new surroundings. She was willing to bet that if she asked him to hours later, he would be able to describe the corridor, every door and window, every potential escape. It was behaviour typical of abuse survivors, and of criminals and Laura made a mental note of it as they walked on.

"At the end of the corridor there is the dining room, where, obviously, we eat, um, down the other end of this corridor there are some arts and crafts rooms, which I'm sure you'll see a lot of. Up the stairs are the boarding rooms, and what we call the Medication Station, which is where you'll go every day for your medication. There are also a couple of common rooms so you can watch TV or just hang out in the free time of the day. There are gardens but given the season you wont see too much of those, unless the weather picks up, and uh, well here at St Patrick's we think its best to start as you mean to go on so you're gonna go right into a group session right now, meet the people you're going to be seeing a lot of while you're here" Laura stopped out side of a door and pushed it open ushering Jack in.

"But if I hadn't killed that little bastard it would have bitten the baby and the baby would have died" a wiry kid with a shock of white blonde hair was speaking hurriedly, nervously, his arms wrapped around himself in a vice like hug.

"But Arthur, you remember we talked about this, there wasn't any baby. You imagined the baby" a woman with chestnut brown hair streaked with distinguished grey said kindly but firmly.

"There could have been a baby, you don't know" Arthur muttered.

Other than the older woman, no one in the room was older than maybe sixteen.

There where just over half a dozen people sat on chairs and sofa's positioned haphazardly through the room. Arthur was sitting in a plastic chair near the older woman, like an attentive student in a class.

"Dr Bergen?" Laura said politely "This is Jack Mercer"

The brunette woman gave Jack a kindly smile as he glanced at the other young people in the room.

"Let me introduce you to everybody" Dr Bergen noted Jack's lack of response and rose, stepping toward him.

"Uh, everyone, this is Jack" she spoke to the group "Jack, this is…" she pointed as she spoke "Arthur" the blonde haired kid gave Jack a sharp nod "beside him, that's Ted but everyone calls him Bear" a kid who looked taller than Jack and was at least a couple of hundred pounds, smiled from a big friendly face, his eyes dark and deep set, his skin pale by contrast "Uh, that's Bebe" a girl with dark, chocolate coloured skin and a messily shaven head gave Jack a shy smile, "And sitting on the bean bag chair as Drew" a young man with sandy brown hair and wire frame specs raised an eyebrow at Jack "Behind Drew we have Amanda" a plump red haired girl with freckle covered skin chewed a nail and regarded Jack with suspicious hostility. "Then there's Diggy" a Latino youth gave a friendly nod "Beside him is Jamal" a boy with Jet black skin raised a surprised eyebrow at Jack, his eyes flashing with recognition "And last but never least, Poe" A small young girl who only just looked fourteen sat at the window, perched nimbly on the narrow window ledge. She didn't acknowledge Jack or give any indication she had heard Dr Bergen say her name.

"Why don't you take a seat Jack" Laura said kindly "You can watch how the group interacts"

She let Jack make his own way into the room. He took a seat in one of the deep armchairs, watching the other young people in the room.

"Well…since you know everyone's name, why don't we all go around and each say something about ourselves so Jack knows who we all are?" Dr Bergen asked "Arthur we might as well start with you"

The white haired kid shrugged nonchalantly but there was glint in his eyes that Jack recognized as a love of attention. "I'm Arthur. I killed my Grandmothers stupid little terrier and they threw me in here because I swallowed some pills. Unfair punishment right?" he said angrily, looking to Jack for an agreement.  
Jack gave him a cold stare as Dr Bergen tutted at Arthur and pointed to Bear.

"Hey man, I'm Bear" the big kid chuckled "I'm in here for uh…" he frowned, looking to Dr Bergen "What is it again Doc?" he asked.

"Bear has some anger management issues and what we call selective memory- he edits out the parts of his memory where he…misbehaves. We want to find out why" Dr Bergen gave the boy a kind but strained smile.

Bebe came next, her hollow and sunken cheeks making her look some how angry "They say I don't eat enough" Bebe shrugged.

"And" Dr Bergen pushed.

"And I tried to hang myself or something" the girl rolled her eyes, "Whatever" she sighed dramatically.

Beside Bebe, Drew gave her a softly amused smile and looked over at Jack "Uh, I had some problems with a bully" he pushed his specs further up his nose casually "I …what is it you cal it Doc? I saw red and put the guy in the hospital, and I fooled around with my Dads gun, almost shot myself in the head too. It was a genuine accident but it's the law or something that I come here" he gave a sheepish shrug and half looked over his shoulder at Amanda.

"Obsession with a guy at my school" Amanda said a little breathlessly, as if fighting to contain her excitement "okay not a guy, my lab teacher, he's a babe, seriously, you have to see him, I had some pictures but they took them away but he's a total fox, for serious, but he told me I wasn't allowed to go over to his house because he could lose his job, well that's what he said but I know it was because his wife was there so I set the house on fire, cos I figured it was his wife who wouldn't let us be together so I just tried to get rid of her and the police just like, _freaked out_ and it was just this whole big mess" she threw her hands up, giggling in genuine amusement.

Dr Bergen held out a calming hand, as the young Latino, Diggy leaned forward to speak "I killed my dad cos he was beatin on my mom and my mom said it didn't happen and that I made it all up so here I am" he said smiling.

"Maybe you just an uppity little spic needs showin his place" the African American youth, Jamal sneered.

"Well I sure as shit aint gonna be shown it by now uppity nigger!" Diggy snarled angrily, rising in his seat.

"Hey, I will have _none _of that or you will be locked in your rooms" Dr Bergen snapped "Now Jamal, why are you here?" she continued, her voice holding the same warning as her words.

"I pushed my bitch principal down the stairs" Jamal rolled his eyes "I know you Mercer" he said, his voice oddly void of inflection.

Jack raised his head slowly and fixed Jamal with one of those Looks he was capable of, but the dark skinned youth managed not to react. He narrowed his eyes "What you in here for Mercer?" he asked quietly.

"Poe first!" Amanda squeaked happily, pointing to the still silent girl at the window.

"Poe, introduce yourself please" Bergen prompted.

The girl tilted her head slightly, her long dark brownish red hair sliding over one shoulder. She turned her head to look back into the room just enough that Jack got a glimpse of a green eye, pale skin.

"Poe" Bergen said more firmly.

"I'm not" Poe whispered cryptically.

As she raised one hand to touch her own cheek, Jack saw a neat scar running down the inside of her wrist and found himself slightly interested in her.

"Poe we're talking about why we're all at St Patrick's" Bergen said in the loud, over pronounced tones of some one who knew they where dealing with a difficult listener.

Poe fixed the doctor with a murderous glare but turned to Jack and raised an eyebrow "I had a disagreement with the Reaper" she gave him a half smile "We all did"

"Stop being so melodramatic" Arthur sighed "You tried to off yourself because you're bat shit crazy, no other reason"

Poe gave him wide eyes and looked at Jack again "Arthur has issues because everyone knows he made up the baby so people wouldn't think he was just a sick little fuck tard for killing the dog" she said softly.

"Poe" Bergen said warningly.

"Bergen?" Poe shot back.

"Behave" Bergen stated.

"I'm just telling Jack all about the gang" Poe gave a sweet smile "That's what you wanted isn't it?"

"Poe" Bergen warned again.

"Is it lunchtime yet?" Diggy asked suddenly, clearly trying to change the subject.

"As a matter of fact it is" Laura said, raising an eyebrow pointedly at Bergen.  
"Jack are you hungry?" Laura asked.

Jack silently stood as the rest of the people in the group filed put of the room, leaving Poe and Bergen alone. Bergen looked as if she wanted to talk to Poe alone but the girl danced, as in, she pirouetted, past the doctor, giving Jack a neat little curtsy and danced out of the door.

"As you can see we have some eclectic groups of young people here, and sometimes there's a little bit of tension. But that's part of life" Laura smiled at him.

"Follow me" she gave the most imperceptible widening of her eyes to Dr Bergen who shrugged minutely and walked with them to the dining room.

There where several groups like Jack's entering the room, or sitting down to eat as catering staff moved amongst the young people, serving out meals. Jack glanced over at Poe to see that she was staring at a kid who was Jack's height but twice his muscle mass, who was taunting the red haired girl, Amanda. Amanda's grin remained on her face but had grown strained as the kid sneered and snarled at her.

Poe was hunched over the table, her eyes flickering from Amanda's reddening face to the boys cruel grin as Amanda began to blink back tears.

Everyone except the other youths in the room seemed oblivious that any kind of confrontation was taking place but Jack saw Poe tense a slit second before she sprung across the table, tackling the boy in a blur of movement. Despite his size in comparison to hers she took him down as the adults in the room ran toward the fight. Jack found himself smiling as he saw other fights erupt around the room and as people crowded around the other fight, one huge orderly strode through the crowd reaching into the tangle of people. He jerked his arm back up and was holding Poe by the back of the t-shirt, her legs kicking down even as she was yanked clear of the fight.

The orderly, threw the tiny girl over his shoulder as she wriggled and fought against him, landing some pretty solid blows on his back as he tried to walk away from the fight while other orderlies began working to break up the fights and calm the situation down.

"Fuck off, get off me!" Poe was yelling, her voice manic and delighted "Let me kill that ugly mother fucker Lou, come on, you know he deserves it!" she was asking the orderly who chuckled as he carried her toward the door.

He set her down, holding onto her arms, in front of Dr Bergen who raised an eyebrow at the girl.

"What was that?" Dr Bergen asked as another orderly separated the original teaser from the crowd, dragging the tall kid toward Bergen

"Brad started it" Poe said sweetly.

"Lyin little bitch" Brad muttered, wiping at his bloody nose.

Poe rolled her eyes and lunged for him again, actually getting air borne as the huge orderly caught her nimbly in mid air.

Jack laughed out loud suddenly, his voice high and hysterical but he couldn't help it and even as Laura and Dr Bergen frowned at him he hunched over, clutching his stomach as the laughter bubbled up and out. He felt like something inside him had broken and wasn't going to get fixed anytime soon and he backed away from the group, all of whom stared at him except for Poe who took advantage of the distraction to throw a punch at Brad. Another shout of laughter escaped and Jack pressed his back against the wall behind him as Laura moved to his side, trying to soothe him.

Poe very suddenly bit down on the hand of the orderly and he yet out a yelp of pain as she began to worry at the hand, shaking her head from side to side.

"Poe!" Bergen rushed toward the girl who immediately released the hand and darted past them, crouching in front of Jack, putting her hands on his face and staring directly into his eyes.

She had green eyes, coloured through with some kind of, almost amber streaks, the irises ringed with thick, night shade blue as if some one had taken a thick pen and drawn an outline around the iris.

Her skin was pale but lightly freckled and her lips where full but serious some how, sombre. Jack thought she looked like a pixie and his laughs ceased as he looked at her " 'We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little life is rounded with a sleep' " she quoted "Run away home Jack, Peter can only hold Hook off for so long, and after that, we're all dead" her eyes grew fearful and Jack frowned, one part of his mind thinking that the girl was clearly very disturbed, another part thinking that she was some one who could be interesting to hang out with.

She made a squeak of pain and her eye lids fluttered. As she swooned, Jack saw Dr Bergen holding a needle which she had jabbed into Poe's leg.

The big orderly caught the girl easily and Dr Bergen gave Jack a look, then walked with the orderly, out of the room as he carried Poe in his arms, cradling her like a child.

"Jack, are you okay?" Laura asked and Jack realised the fights where petering out and the patients where settling down.  
The other orderly was checking Brad's nose to see how badly it was hurt and Jack suddenly felt an overwhelming compulsion to find a knife, to cut at his arms. He didn't know where the urge came from and he rubbed roughly at his wrists, feeling the thick bandages and under them, the raised ridges of the stitches in his wrist.

He dug his fingers into the ridges, feeling the burst of pain and the hot rush of blood on his wrist.

"Jack!" Laura pulled his hand away from his now bleeding arm and pushed his sleeve up, pulling off the bandage to see how much damage he had done.

"Not too bad" she told him, examining the cuts where he had pulled a couple of stitches.

"Let's go clean this up" Laura said kindly.

Jack stared at her "I'm not crazy" he told her.

She looked up at him and gave him a small smile "You do speak then?" she asked.

"I'm not like these other people" Jack stated "I don't need to be here"

"Jack, no one thinks you're crazy. We just think you need some time with other kids who have had experiences like you, to help you get better" she assured him.

"What about, the others, in that group? They're bat shit crazy and you know it" he stated.

"Some of em have more reason to be here than others, I'll admit, but mostly they're just kids who have had a hard time, who need some…guidance" Laura helped him to his feet, holding his arm so the blood ran down to be absorbed by his clothes.

"I'm not crazy" Jack repeated.

"I know that"

"But you'll make me stay?" Jack asked.

"It's the law Jack, you tried to kill your self, you have to come here" Laura shrugged as she walked him through the corridors to a room that looked like the nurses office at Jack's school.

"I didn't try to kill myself" Jack stated.

"Then what am I bandaging up, shaving cuts?" Laura asked, digging antiseptic wipes and bandages out of a drawer.

Jack couldn't help the small smirk that came to his lips as Laura shot him an amused look.

"So you're gonna start talking to people now?" Laura asked as she began cleaning the wound, apologising minutely as Jack winced slightly.

Jack pressed his lips together angrily "I don't wanna do that therapy bull shit, I don't need that"

"Tough" Laura raised an eyebrow "Everyone does therapy Jack, thems the rules"

"Cant I call in sick?" Jack asked wearily.

Laura regarded him sadly, "You've been through more bad shit than almost any one here. It helps to talk about it" She told him "I know it seems weird and at first, it is, but eventually, you will see why we advise it, you will" she promised.

Jack let her wrap up his wrist, then watched impassively as she pushed his sleeve further up to look at the cuts and old scars.

"Did these hurt?" she asked, reaching for his other arm to see to his other wrist.

"That was the point" Jack told her.

"Well, not any more. We're gonna find a way to help you let things out without having to hurt your self" Laura nodded.

"What ever" Jack pulled his arms back, letting his hands rest in his lap.

"Wow, you just jump from emotion to emotion huh?" Laura asked "Well we're gonna deal with all of that" she nodded again "but for now, lets just say, welcome to St Pat's"

"When can I go home?" Jack asked.

Laura's smile faltered and she pursed her lips "When we think you've made satisfactory progress" she stated.

"I just want to go home" Jack muttered plaintively.

"And you can. When you get better" Laura told him.

"Fuck St Pats" Jack growled.

"Nice"

"Fuck you too" Jack cocked his head to one side "Fuck everybody"


	13. Chapter 13

heee, i had you all fooled thinking you'd have to wait for an update but no!mwahahah!KK guys, this is a mini update to shake things up a bit, keep y'all on your toes because SOME PEOPLE think i'm going the predictable route and to those people i say, never ever try t predicit what route i will go, you have no idea how random i can get and if you want a semi coherent narrative structure to remain, let me do what i want to do, k?

Now, Disclaimers, i only own the OC's . langauge and content etc blah blee blah, read it and enjoy!And dont vent at me over stuff that aint my fault please, go to a blog or something, yeesh.

xx

* * *

"So….why don't we talk to Jack today" Dr Bergen looked over to Jack who started, having tuned out the woman's voice when she started the session talking about prayers and healing.

"What?" he mumbled, having started to doze off as Dr Bergen talked on and on. He had been given some pills that would supposedly reduce the effects as he detoxed the bad drugs from his system, and as a result, he felt groggy and suspected the drugs where sedatives too.

"We want you to open the session. We want to know all about you" Dr Bergen smiled politely and Jack raised an eyebrow.

"You read my file?" Jack asked her.

"Of course" Bergen shrugged.

"Look, I just saved us all ten minutes" Jack gave her a fake smile and went back to staring at the wall.

"Well, the rest of the group wants to hear it all too" Bergen told him.

Jack's eyes flicked to Jamal, who gave him a knowing grin and leaned forward "Yeah Mercer, we all want to hear your story" Jamal bobbed his head slightly as Jack chewed his inner lip.

"Do I have to tell it, is it the law?" Jack asked.

"Lets just do some paintings" Poe enthused, "I feel like, visually expressing my angst"

Jack frowned in disbelief but Bergen grinned "Yes, okay, shall we try that then?" she asked the group.

They agreed with Poe and Bergen led them to an arts and crafts room, watching with a smile as they all pulled on aprons and took up brushes.

She helped them set up easels and laid out paints for them before standing back "I want everyone to paint…something that represents their pain" she told them "Then when we're done, we're all going to talk about them, including you Jack" she gave him a pointed look.

She let them get to work and Jack stared at the thick brush in his hand, glancing around to see everyone smearing paint haphazardly on their easels. He noticed that Bear and Poe had taken up charcoal pieces and where sketching skilfully. Jack looked around and spotted his own piece of charcoal and took it up, holding it in his hand as he stared at the easel. He tuned out his surroundings and his hand raised almost involuntarily and began to move in sweeping lines across the canvas, sketching out the basic image of a huge, snarling bear, its jaws dripping with saliva as it loomed over a tiny child, a little boy who resembled Jack who stood before it with blank eyes, staring up at his own inevitable demise, unmoving. Jack regarded it for a second then added a pair of hands on the boy's ankles, holding him in place. The arms came out of the ground like roots and dug into the boys' legs, drawing blood. Jack added snow to the image, and in the distance, behind the boy, he drew figures, beckoning to him.

"Wow" Some one breathed close to him and Jack jumped, spinning to see Amanda standing beside him, grinning widely. "Sorry, but, wow" she looked at his drawing and Jack automatically stepped in front of it, hiding it from her view.

"Oh, okay, no problem" her smile faltered ever so slightly and she nodded "I understand if you don't want people to see it" she said sadly.

"Oh" Jack said haltingly "No it's…I'm sorry" he said, it's not personal, I just don't think anyone's ever seen anything I've done before" he admitted.

"Really?" Amanda asked, "Wanna see mine?" she brightened immediately and reached for Jack's hand to tow him to her canvas and he flinched away from her hand but followed her to her easel.

Her picture was a half decent drawing of a man in his thirties with dark hair and very, very blue eyes; too blue in fact, no pupils, just two huge blue circles.

"That's him, my teacher, Guy, he had the most beautiful eyes, just beautiful" she spoke rapidly, grinning the entire time.

"I see that" Jack said carefully "What's that behind him?" he pointed to a feminine figure standing in front of what looked like a burning house.

"His Bitch Wife" Amanda said, her voice going hard and flat.

"Oh" Jack raised his eyebrows and realised Poe wasn't the only genuine loony in the place.

"Well since you two are sharing shall we all share?" Bergen asked the group aloud.

Muttering and sighing, the youths gathered around Amanda's painting first.

"Amanda. You drew Guy again" Bergen said, clearly exasperated.

"Well, he's…" Amanda was still smiling but was blinking again, trying to think of something to say "He's what I think about. And I hurt when I can't be with him" she shrugged slightly.

"Amanda, next time, you have to draw something different okay? I understand your pain-"

"No!" Amanda snapped, interrupting Bergen "You don't understand, you couldn't"

Bergen nodded and spoke soothingly "I want to see something different next time though, okay?" she asked.

"Fine" Amanda muttered unconvincingly.

Next was Jamal. His picture was rough and simple and showed a stick figure that had been labelled 'Jamal' running away from a gang of youths labelled with a symbol Jack recognized as a gang insignia he sometimes saw back home. The Jamal figure was running toward a building labelled school and a giant stick figure woman with an angry, cruel face stood in front of the school, effectively blocking Jamal's path.

"This us my pain, that I'm in here cos people think I'm crazy when all that happened is I was trying to get away from the homeboys and she wouldn't let me in, so I pushed her and suddenly I'm a nut job with anger problems" the kid told them.

"Mm, but Jamal, why did your principal turn you away that time? Because you had a reputation for fighting and causing trouble" Bergen reminded him.

"I didn't push her to hurt her though, I just wanted her out of my way" Jamal rolled his eyes.

"Arthur?" Bergen pointedly ignored Jamal's protests as the group moved on to Arthur's picture.

Like Jamal, Arthur didn't have a lot of technical skill but still knew how to show what he wanted to show. His painting was of a cartoonishly oversized dog terrorising a tiny screaming baby while a stick figure with that shock of white blonde hair stood with a knife, frozen in his lunge to kill the dog.

"The dog this time?" Bergen sounded surprised "Well done Arthur" she nodded.

"Well I'm sick of painting Aunt Marie" Arthur said and Jack frowned, not understanding the comment but Bergen seemed content that Arthur had drawn the dog and they moved on.

Drew had painted a very competent image of a locker with a pair of eyes peering out of the slats in the locker door. A pair of oversized glasses hung on the door and there where 'quake' marks doodled in to make it appear as if the locker was shaking.

Drew's style was, to Jack, a cross between comic books and cartoons, and he gave a nod of appreciation.

"Um, me, in a locker. Ow" Drew said a little sarcastically, obviously not comfortable with the situation.

"Is there a reason the locker is wearing the glasses?" Amanda asked.

"Uh…cos when I attacked the bully that's how I felt. Like I wasn't a kid, I was just a locker, cos I kept getting stuffed into em" he shrugged.

"I like it" Bergen nodded "It's very telling" she gave Drew a kindly smile.

They moved on to Bebe's image which at first, Jack thought was simple a big round ball. Then he realised there where hands, feet, and a teeny head.

"That's how I am" the stick thin Bebe stated "And it hurts"

"Why is you head so small?" Poe asked.

"Cos my size, my problem when I keep eating, its bigger than my head, it takes over my mind. I don't have any control and its why I'm so big" Bebe told the, her voice never wavering. She truly believed what she was saying.

"That's…some thing we're going to talk about Bebe" Bergen told her.

Poe's was next. She had some skill too and her sketch was of a small girl standing beside a pair of graves, crying, while in the background, monsters, dark shadowy figures, congregated, ready to snatch the girl.

"That's me, and that's Mama and the little baby, we never named him but I like to think of him as Trevor, and he died and she died and those monsters are the bad people who took me in and that's my pain" Poe explained very simply.

"She has a knife" Jack remarked, pointing to the girl, who did indeed have a knife just peeking out from behind her back.

"Yeah. That's when I did these" Poe flashed her scarred wrists, nodding, and Jack realised she was uncomfortable.

"Well Poe, usually you draw the exact opposite of what I ask" Bergen stated "This is great! What changed?"

"I have a huge crush on Jack and I wanted to impress him" Poe stated seriously.

Jack blushed as Amanda giggled hysterically and Bear covered a smile with one hand.

"Well…" Bergen faltered "At least you're honest" she managed.

Poe shrugged and they walked over to Bear's canvas.

It was another very well done piece of work, showing Bear with one huge hand crushing a collection of flowers, children, kittens, all pleasant pretty things, and in the other, holding a question mark.

"I don't know _why _I do what I do, and I don't remember doing these things, and I don't like hurting people so it hurts _me_ wondering why I do it" the big kid explained.

"Great, as usual" Bergen smiled.

Diggy's painting was simply done but complicated in content. It showed a man beating a woman while a small boy watched, a knife in his hand. The word 'help' flowed from the boys mouth growing larger and larger as it reached a group of people labelled 'teacher' 'cop' and 'neighbours' who had angry faces and their hands on their ears. Their eyes had been drawn extra wide and where aimed toward another image of an older boy, clearly the older Diggy, standing with the bloodied knife in hand over the body of the beating man, Diggy's hand reaching to his mother who had her mouth covered with both hands. The word 'crazy' had been lightly drawn in the space between the eyes and the older Diggy.

"Uh…kinda self explanatory?" Diggy waved a hand at the drawing.

"Yes it is" Bergen agreed "But it's the same thing you draw every week" she pointed out.

"I'm gonna keep on drawing it till you believe it" Diggy shrugged, walking away to Jack's sketch.

The group followed him and looked to Jack for an explanation when they had all examined it.

"Uh. That's me. And I'm threatened by bad things. And I cant get away from them and my family wants me to go to them and be happy with them but I uh, I cant, I'm sort of, stuck, by the hands, the roots, my past" he sheepishly explained.

"That's dark man" Diggy nodded.

"It's scary" Bebe hugged herself "Why isn't little Jack trying to fight the bear?" she asked.

"He cant" Jack said blankly, "It's too big, it's too much for him to fight" he was surprised by his own words as he spoke them, never having realised how much thought went into the drawings he did.

"The bear…its not just people trying to hurt you? It's your own like, issues, right?" Drew asked.

"I think so" Jack nodded.

"Damn" Bear said "I feel like I should apologise"

Jack felt his embarrassment fade slightly as the bigger kid clapped him on the back and gave him a sincere look "I'm sorry" Bear said sombrely.

Jack laughed but stepped away from Bear's hand scratching his head in embarrassment.

"I feel like this has been a very productive session guys, I really do" Bergen was grinning from ear to ear "Well done, to all of you"

* * *

Hours later, Jack sat on the sofa, leaning on his hand as he idly stared at the TV which was entertaining most of the other people in the room.

The people sitting around Jack where the youths who lived on the same floor as Jack did, and only included Jamal and Poe from the group.

Jamal was sitting in an armchair across from Jack, staring at Jack's bandaged wrists which Jack realised where exposed by how his sweater had bunched up.

"What happened Mercer?" Jamal asked, grinning.

"Your mother did it, she's into a little pain in the bedroom" Jack shot back casually.

Jamal snorted, letting the insult slide but leaned forward slightly "Come on man, we're in here together, you can tell me" Jamal pressed "What'd your old man come back for another ride of the Jackie Train?" the kid sneered.

Jack made a fist so tight his knuckles popped but what ever pill he had been given just after supper made him lethargic and he couldn't seem to work up the energy to rise and beat Jamal to a bloody mess.

"He was too busy raping your dad in prison" Jack said, his voice totally empty.

"Fuck you Mercer" Jamal shook his head.

"What about you Jamal, you gotta be in here for more than pushin your principal down the stairs?" Jack asked.

"You agree it's stupid I'm in here?" Jamal actually seemed to appreciate Jack's statement "its unfair man, its stupid" he shook his head.

"Maybe your lawyer pleaded insanity" Jack suggested "Bobby's guy did that a couple times, got him reduced sentences and shit on a few cases when he was a kid"

"Wouldn't he have had to tell me if he did?" the kid asked.

Jack shrugged sheepishly as Poe stepped over the back of the sofa and sat cross legged, chewing a fingernail idly.

"Poe, Poe" Jamal grinned "You know how you're into Jack?" he smirked at her.

"Yeah" Poe said matter of factly.

"Ask him why he's in here, is it just the bandages on his wrists or did he play 'good touch, bad touch' with his old man again?" Jamal asked.

"Jamal you pee in your bed" Poe smiled sweetly.

Jamal slumped back in his seat, and Jack realised he wasn't the only one who had been sedated. He had encountered Jamal once or twice in days past and the guy was not the type to take insults, any insults lightly.

"Why you gotta do that Poe?" Jamal snapped.

"Well I used to too" Poe shrugged.

She turned to Jack "So…?" she waved a hand to ward the bandages.

"I had some problems" Jack told her.

"Duh" Poe rolled her eyes.

She seemed about to ask a question but held up a hand and looked around as if she was trying to spot something "Damn snappers" she muttered under her breath, shaking her head and looking back at Jack.

Jack blinked at her, wondering what she would be like if she wasn't medicated.

"So?" Poe repeated.

"Well…uh my dad, when I was a kid he kinda….had the wrong idea's about showin me affection" Jack admitted "So I think he mighta screwed something up in my head"

"My step mom drowned me one time" Poe told him "It really sucked"

"Wow" Jack frowned "Why?"

"She was a schizo with strong religious beliefs and her mind told her I was the antichrist. It didn't help that I tended to…go off the rails every now and then and sort of, hear voices, but what are ya gonna do right?" Poe smiled brightly and Jack chuckled.

"I guess" he agreed.

"I'm getting out of here though" she said quietly "I found a way to get outside and once I do, I am _gone_" she winked at him.

"When?" Jack asked.

"Next week, it has to be, no one sees on Thursdays" she said cryptically "Not even blue"

"Uh huh" Jack nodded.

"I can't wait to be out of here" she enthused.

Jack smiled at her, remembering how she had touched his face in the dining hall the day before and chewed his lip nervously "Do you have to go?" he asked.

"Oh yes. I need to" she said seriously "It all relies on what can happen at high noon"

She stood suddenly and wandered off, yelling to one of the orderlies.

"She's uh…" Jack started.

"A fucking loony" Jamal suggested.

"That about covers it" Jack nodded "How long has she been in here?" he asked.

"Well in _here_ about a year, but she's been getting psych evaled since she was six or seven and been in special homes too. She's born nutty" Jamal explained.

"She ever getting out?" Jack asked.

"She seems to think so but I heard Bergen sayin once that all they can do for her is provide her with a roof over her head till she's old enough to go in a real Mental Institution" Jamal shook his head "She's never getting out into the real world. Sad thing is, I think she kinda knows it too, that's what makes her little escape attempts so sad, she wouldn't have anywhere to go even if she did get out"

* * *

Jack was staring at the tree, which stood behind the house. It too had bare branches reaching toward the sky, but unlike the miniature woods surrounding the house, this tree stood alone in the centre of a manicured lawn. Jack had noticed it on his first night, and again the morning after, as it stood almost directly across from his window. What was drawing his attention to it on this morning was the odd shape hanging from one of its lower branches. Jack leaned close to the window, pressing one hand to the glass, frowning at what looked like some kind of distasteful decoration. He could hear the orderlies and nurses knocking on doors, waking the patients up as the day started. Jack had only slept at St Patrick's because they sedated all the patients, but he had found he would wake up very suddenly in the mornings, as if his body was overriding the affects of the drugs, waking him up alert and on edge. He seemed to wake before the staff woke him too, which he found was useful as he would have a short time alone in his room when he was wide awake and could think clearly. He had been watching the rain when he noticed the thing in the tree and now he couldn't repress a shudder as it began to swing gently back and forth in the wind.

He heard a yell behind him and realised one of the nurses was shouting about Poe not being in her room. Jack suddenly became very aware of how the thing in the tree was dark red and he remembered in a flash that Poe had been wearing red pyjamas the last time he had seen her.

"Fuck" he breathed "Shit" he ran to his door and began banging on it, "The tree!" he called out "The fucking tree, she's in the tree!"

He heard a click and his door opened and the nurse he knew as Fran pushed past him and frowned out of his window, gasping in shock as she spotted it.

"Wait here!" she barked at him, running out of the door and down the corridor, snatching at a radio she had on her belt.

Jack walked back to the window, pressing his hands to his mouth as he gazed at the sight of Poe, hanging by her neck, the dark streak of her hair blowing, stirring in the wind.

He could see people now running out of the house, charging toward the tree and he realised he was shaking as he saw that he could just make out the pale skin on her hands and feet as they dangled limply.

The people, doctors and nurses he guessed who reached the tree first couldn't reach her and a detached part of his brain theorised Poe must have spent some time climbing the tall tree to reach the right branch.

He turned and wandered out of his room, walking through the house silently as nurses rushed around, trying to regain control of the patients who where growing panicked as they realised something had happened.

Jack found his way to the back door and walked out into the rain slated garden, walking toward the tree, driven by some un known compulsion. The people trying to cut Poe down seemed to busy to notice him so he simply stood before her, that detached part of him observing how her neck was hyper extended and her skin was blue and she was soaked by the rain.

"Jack!" Bergen's voice cut through his thoughts and he turned to look at the doctor as she approached and forcibly turned him around, away from the sight of Poe's body.

"Jack get back inside" she told him firmly.

Jack ignored her and turned back to Poe, memorising the image of her hanging there. He looked down and blinked, frowning in confusion, "She said she was escaping" he told Bergen "But she did this…I don't get it"

"Maybe this is what she meant" Bergen was walking Jack back toward the house "Poe didn't have any where to escape too Jack, she was very troubled…we'll talk about this later okay, now please, just go inside?" the doctor looked suddenly very tired and Jack nodded obligingly, suddenly wanting his mother more than anything.

He let more nurses and orderlies rush around him, trying to find ways to hide what had happened, then headed to the office which had been left open.

Jack still hadn't been allowed to contact his family, as a part of his therapy but he sat at a desk and picked up a phone, dialling home.

It picked up after a few rings and Evelyn's voice, sounding bright and fresh despite the early hour, politely asked who was calling.

"Ma?" Jack asked "Ma when can I come home?"

He heard his mother gasp and start to cry and he glanced up, freezing as he realised that he could see The Tree through the window, and that Poe was still hanging, cold and dead, swinging in the wind as the rain fell down.


	14. Chapter 14

All right, this is a shorter than average update but its 3am. Also, i know its been waaaay longer than normal with my updates, but people, i was on vacation!And it wasnt a totally great holiday either, it was almost but not quite as depressing as my christmas holiday which was the worst christmas of my life but lets not go into that now. Same disclaimers, i dont own blah language and content blah be warned blah dee bleh.

Erm, forgot what i was gonna say...erm...thanks as always for the fantastic reviews, seriously, if you knew how much it means to me to see the 'email from botfanfiction..etc' in my inbox, you would probably review me just out of pity! But yeah, i love all you peepsl sepecially my peep peeps, you know who ya are ya crazy bunch, Addle Eddle, seriously, with the rockin, keep it up darlin for serious!

But yep, thats that. Enjoy it folks!xx

* * *

Bergen was sitting in her usual seat, her face pale and drawn, her hair pulled back into a simple ponytail. She had a note pad on her lip and her face had that flushed, scrubbed look you get from washing your face after crying too much.

The group sat around her, silent, shocked. Amanda had been quietly weeping for a while and Bebe and Drew sat on either side of her, trying to comfort her.

Poe, it had been discovered had escaped from her room by picking the lock on her window and using braided sheets to climb down. She had used more braided sheets to hang herself from the tree and it had been remarked that given how tightly the sheets had been braided together, she must have been working on them for some time. She had never expected, or planned, to leave St Patrick's alive.

It was the day after she had killed herself and the staff at the institute where trying to get things back to normal, resuming therapy sessions. Jack, after calling his mother, had been discovered by Dr Bergen, pleading with his mother to come and get him while he huddled under a desk, his eyes fixed on the tree where Poe had died, even though she had long since been cut down.

Evelyn however had been briefed and on what to do if Jack acted in such a way, and could do nothing more than tell him it was for his own good being in St. Patricks.

When Bergen had given Jack a sedative and led him back to his room to sleep away the day, she had seen something unnerving in his eyes, almost like some last dim light that had been there had gone out, and she was concerned about his reaction to his mothers actions.

He sat now at the same window Poe had sat at every day and he realised it actually smelled like her, a sweet, clean smell, like scented soap.

Bergen took a deep breath "If anyone has anything they would like to say, feel free" she said, her voice hollow.

"Like what?" Drew asked softly "What could anyone possibly have to say?"

"I know you're all feeling…a lot of shock, a lot of sadness…Poe was one of our little family here and she had her problems but she was some one we all loved…you must have some feelings about what happened?" Bergen sounded exhausted.

"It's fucked up" Bear snapped.

He had been close to Poe, viewing her as probably his only friend.

Jack had seen them together outside of group and it was obvious Bear had been nuts about the girl, and the tiny girl had adored the hulking teen.

"She was…I…It shouldn't have happened, it shouldn't have been allowed to happen, you all fucked up, you knew she had tried to kill herself before, you knew she wouldn't talk about it…you fucking knew she still had all those problems in her head and you didn't watch her close enough" his voice was almost incoherently thick with emotion.

"Bear. This was no bodies fault, Poe-" Bergen started.

"Fuck you 'it was nobodies fault' It was your fault! You ass holes" Bear spat and something in the way he said it signalled the end of his participation in the session.

Bergen sighed "Any one else?" she looked around "Jack…you where outside Jack…you saw her more closely than any one here…what are your feelings?"

Jack gave her that blank eyed look and she shuddered. She had seen his distant 'thousand yard stare' as his mother described it, that studied, blank look he hid behind when he felt endangered. But this was different. There was nothing in Jack's eyes. She couldn't have described it to some one who hadn't seen it but she felt a knawing fear in her stomach a word rose in her mind 'dead'. Jack's eyes where dead. He had given up completely to what ever deep rooted despair lived within him. "Jack?" she said concernedly, "Sweetie, talk to me?" She rose from her seat and stepped closer to him.

"She was fourteen" Jack said dully "She was a little tiny kid and she killed her self. But hey, it wasn't the first time she had tried it right? I mean she cut her wrists and they saved her that time right? Interrupted her…but she wasn't one of those people who would be deterred, she had a mission in mind, a goal, and she achieved it. I say good for her, I respect anyone who sets out to achieve their goals and does it, we should all follow her example" Jack's usually deep voice was high and a little breathy, and Bergen could see the deadness in his eyes giving way to a manic wildness.

"Jack" she said, keeping her voice low.

"No I mean it, well done to her! I'd applaud but every one seems a little on edge so I wouldn't want to startle them, but hey, didn't she look peaceful swinging in the wind like that, it's a shame she didn't have like, a ball gown or something to wear, that would have made for a much more striking visual effect, although it might have been a little clichéd, and I kind of think Poe wouldn't like to seem clichéd, so maybe dying in her pyjamas was okay with her" Jack couldn't stop the words that bubbled up and out of his mouth "But I don't know, I didn't know her that well, I do know she was bat shit crazy but she was just about the only person in here who seemed to be having fun with her life such as it was, and I envy that but I guess its all irrelevant now, because she died, it doesn't matter who was or wasn't watching her closely enough, she probably would have found away even if she'd been tied down to her bed, you all said it yourself, she had no where to go, she had no one to go home to, she didn't want to be here, but she made what she could of it while she was" he blinked and stared at his hands as if he'd never seen them before, then looked up at Bergen with wide, terrified eyes.

As she looked at him, he lost what ever tenuous grip on reality he had had, physically reeling back away from her, his eyes questioning "Jack, please, no, Jack don't do this!" Bergen snapped at him but he was backing away from her, fear in his eyes.

He was losing his mind, and he knew it. His face crumpled and tears began to flow from his eyes, as his mind, desperate to protect him from any more trauma, began cutting off any ties to the outside world, trapping him in a bubble of his own fractured psyche. He was watching her with desperate eyes, pleading with her to save him, but even as she stepped toward him, something in side of him broke and he tipped his head to one side, his blue eyes rimmed with red, surrounded by tired circles and shadows. Bergen grabbed his hands "Jack, this is real" she squeezed his hands "Focus on this, please Jack, focus on my hands on yours, stay with me!" she almost begged.

Jack shook his head silently as the rest of the group watched and pulled his hands out of hers, almost as if he was consciously letting himself slip away.

"Jack…please!" Bergen said feebly, but he had gone.

* * *

Evelyn Mercer had her sons at her back and a look of anger and determination on her face. Dr Bergen looked at the three boys as Evelyn, her eyes like steel marched into the hospital and glared around at the gathered doctors and nurses.

Bobby Mercer was rage distilled; it hovered around him, a cloud of potential violence and danger. Beside him, Jerry Mercer seemed like a sliver of ice beside the raging fire that was Bobby, but his sharp, intelligent eyes, held a glint that said he was not to be misjudged; he was just as scary as Bobby. On Jerry's left, Angel Mercer was a tall dark shadow who moved with the fluid grace of a military trained killer. His eyes where as cold as Jerry's and the boys flanked their mother like avenging angels.

"What exactly is it you think you're doing here?" Evelyn Mercer snapped, her voice so angry that Bergen actually flinched "You tell me to ignore my son when he calls me, begging me to let him come home. You make me tell him no, it isn't right for him to leave this hospital because he will get better by being here…he didn't tell me that a girl had killed herself so while I hated telling him no, I couldn't deny that it seemed to make some sense as a treatment method. But now…now you're telling me that _because_ I told him no…because I denied _my son_, he is in fact, even worse off than he was before?"

Bergen opened her mouth to speak but Evelyn started up again "Don't" she snapped, one harsh sound "Is he detoxed from the drugs? Nod yes or no"

Bergen actually gulped and forced herself to nod, feeling like a ten year old who had been caught by her grandmother committing some insufferable grandmother sin.

"Well in that case, have some one pack his things, he's coming home with me" Evelyn stated simply.

"No! Miss Mercer, I don't think he's ready to leave" Bergen started to protest but Evelyn's eyes, if possible, grew colder than before until Bergen felt as if she was staring at two tiny pools of ice.

"Tell me no again" Evelyn said quietly, her voice daring Bergen to do it.

Bergen gaped at her.

"Now, show me what I need to sign to take him home and don't you dare try to get in my way or I will have my sons retrieve my boy from what ever room he is in and I can assure you, they will not be neat about it" Evelyn told Bergen.

"There's no need for you to make threats" Bergen felt her temper come back from where ever it had been hiding.

Evelyn fixed her with a look that all but nailed her to the wall "I haven't made any threats. I've only made promises. When I make threats, you'll know"

Bergen took a breath "Miss Mercer, Jack is not well enough to be moved anywhere, a sudden upheaval like this could make him worse"

"Worse?" Evelyn suddenly shouted. She had been speaking in low, clipped tones up until now, which had some how been scarier than if she had come in yelling, but the sudden burst of emotion made Bergen step back as the boys flanking Evelyn reacted to her outburst as if the four of them where tuned together like some fine instrument.

The boys as one, tensed like cats waiting to pounce. The almost imperceptible movement changed everything about them Bergen suddenly realised what Evelyn had meant about threats and promises. Before the three boys had been a threat of violence. Now they where a promise, and Bergen found herself wondering if she could get the whole damned family to leave without anything being broken.

"You should at least see him first, tell me if you think he should leave" Bergen suggested, her voice high and a little breathless.

"GET ME MY SON" Evelyn actually shrieked, taking a step toward Bergen as she did.

Bergen actually turned on her heel and all but ran away from the family. Within forty minutes all the relevant paper work had been signed and Jack was sitting in the Mercer family car, sedated for his own sake, almost totally unconscious. His brothers where sitting in the car with him, Bobby in the front passenger seat, Angel and Jeremiah sitting either side of Jack. All three where glaring at Bergen as she handed Evelyn a folder and some pill bottles "If he needs it, give him one of these, but no more than four a day…you should probably also think about installing some childproof locks, he tends to try and wander off every now and then" she told the older woman "We really are sorry this happened…he's a very damaged boy"

"Don't you dare make excuses or so help me I will knock you on your ass" Evelyn growled and Bergen was beginning to understand why Evelyn could control the boys the way she did. She was god damned terrifying.

"If you find you're having trouble with him, we'd happily re admit him for _proper_ treatment" Bergen told her.

"If I call you it will be to inform you of an impending lawsuit. As it is, I may not go down that route, I wouldn't want to do that to the other children you have here" With the last, Evelyn shook her head, giving Bergen a once over that made Bergen, in her relatively demure outfit of slacks and a blouse under her lab coat, feel like a barely dressed street walker.

Evelyn turned away and marched to her car, climbing in. Without so much as a backwards glance she drove away, but her sons, they turned as the car was pulling out and gave Bergen the same look their mother had, that once over that made her feel as if she was literally nothing.

* * *

Angel was sitting in a chair , one foot on the side of Jack's bed, rocking himself back wards and forwards as he watched Jack. Jack had been doped up all to hell and the Mercer family hated it, so they had opted not to continue with the sedatives he had been prescribed, and where hoping to now detox him off what the doctors had given him.

They had decided to take it in shifts to watch him, to make sure he didn't get sick, or even get up and try to leave, which he had done not long after they first got him home. He hadn't struggled or fought when they guided him back to his bed, simply shuffled with them with frightening complacency.

Angel watched his baby brothers chest rise and fall rhythmically, remembering with a shudder the cold stab of fear he had felt when he had gotten the news from his CO that Jack was in hospital. The man, despite not being too fond of Angel, was aware of the bond the brothers shared, so had been particularly sensitive when he told Angel that his 15 year old brother had tried to kill himself. Angel had been even more shocked when the man had told Angel that he would be getting time off to go to his family, to deal with what ever problems they where having. More than once, while Jack slept almost unstirringly, Angel had found himself doubting his own eyes and had carefully leaned over, laying his hand on Jack's chest, feeling the solid beat of the boys heart.

It was a habit he had gotten into when they where all much younger. For a long time, not long after Jack had come to live with them, Angel had had sudden flashes of fear that Jack was dead in his bed, like the little girl Keisha, whom Angel had known in one of his group homes before he came to Evelyn's house. Keisha had been a perfectly healthy four year old, taken into care because her parents had died in a fire she had escaped totally unscathed. She had big, love filled eyes and a beautiful little smile, and Angel, a hard nut to crack even then had been nuts about her, taking her on as a surrogate little sister for a short time. Then one night, he had awoken gasping and hadn't known why, but had been compelled to go to her room. He had found her, cold and long dead, SIDS, he was later told, Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. There had been no reason for her death, it was as if God had simply decided she wasn't for this world and had taken her back. Angel had suffered nightmares for weeks after wards, but eventually learned to deal, but after meeting Jack the old feelings had come back. Now, he couldn't sit still any more and he leaned forward again, careful not to disturb Jack as he laid his hand over his heart.

It thumped against his palm, strong and steady and Angel looked down at his brother sadly. Though he slept soundly, Jack's was frowning slightly in his sleep, his brow furrowed, his lips pursed petulantly. Angel stroked his hair softly, wishing what ever demons where tormenting his baby brother would leave him be.

"Hey" Jerry called gently from the door way.

Angel turned to see Jerry holding two steaming mugs "Ma made cocoa" he smiled slightly.

Angel returned to his seat and took the offered mug, taking a deep breath, savouring the smell of the mug. None of the boys, not even Evelyn had many good memories in life. But those that they did have had almost all happened in this house. And some how, where almost all focused around cocoa.

"So guess what?" Jerry's smile widened slightly as he spoke quietly.

"What man, you getting your teeth fixed?" Angel joked, knowing his brother wouldn't be bothered.

"Only after you get plastic surgery you ugly bastard" Jerry smirked, both of them settling easily into the habit of harmless, sibling rivalry "Naw, man…I'm gonna be a dad" he raised an eye brow.

"Are you serious?" Angel stated, feeling a smile dancing over his lips.

"Just heard, Ma and Bobby are having champagne downstairs, I'm just drinking this then I'm goin home to see my baby momma" Jerry was smiling like a lunatic, but his eyes where joyous.

Angel set his mug down and stood, pulling his smaller, but older brother into a bear hug. "Congratulations man!" he said quietly "That's a beautiful thing" he released his brother.

Jerry shook his head, blowing out a deep breath "Scary though…a little kid, me?" he shrugged.

"Hey bro, don't worry, Ma raised you. Besides, you're the smartest of us all any way, cept maybe for this crazy little bastard if he could get his shit together" Angel nodded at Jack "You gonna be an incredible father, I mean that man" he said sincerely to Jerry.

"Thank you. I mean that…you're gonna be an uncle. Shit Ma's gonna be a Nana!" Jerry smiled even wider "That's the thing though…you know what Bobby and me did to the fucker hurt Jackie?" he asked seriously.

"I wish I'd been there man, shit" Angel nodded.

"Well…shit like that, that's family you know…that's out of love…but the other stuff we do, hustling and stealin shit and hockin it…I don't think, if I'm gonna be a daddy, I don't wanna be doin stuff that could get me taken away from my family you know?"

Jerry started as a hand touched his shoulder and Bobby walked into the room.

"You saying you want out of what we do?" Bobby asked quietly.

"I don't think it would be appropriate…I don't know man, I mean I'll always be there for the family, that shits just a given. But I think if I have the choice to go straight, which I do…I think I should!" he shrugged.

Bobby sat down on Jack's bed and automatically began checking the kids head for a fever. "If that's what you think you gotta do man, I can get behind it" he told Jerry.

Angel nodded in agreement "You're gonna be a dad. And since between the four of us we can tell you exactly how to mess that up, you're probably gonna be the best dad in the world cos you'll have us helping you out" he smiled.

"Speaking of four, what are we gonna do to fix this little cracker Jack?" Bobby asked.

"We're gonna do what ever the hell it takes" Jerry shrugged, as if it where the most obvious thing in the world.


	15. Chapter 15

Sorry it's een so long, my computer died!My beautiful laptop perished and i had to get a whole new hard drive and it was awful, i was without computers for...okay for a few days but still, it was terrible for me. Any way, this is it, the last chapter ever, im ending it cos i couldnt see what else i could do with it...well i could but it would have been a case of Quantity over Quality.

The same disclaimers, i love you all soooo much, you're amazing all my reviewers, please R+R.

xx.Nadine.xx

* * *

"Jackie Jackie Jackie Jackie" Bobby sing songed "We want you backie backie backie backie"

Jack was slumped on the couch. He'd been home from St Patrick's for over a month and he had yet to get back to his normal state.

"Ooooh Jackie" Bobby sung "Stop being so whacky, cut us some slacky, come baaackie" he scrunched up his face like a rock star going all out on stage, even though he was slumped beside Jack, idly staring at the TV.

This was Mercer therapy. Jack was not going to be sent away or drugged, he was simply going to be around his family, be immersed, in his family until he got better.

The Mercer's knew some things for certain, and one was that if you came from a family who loved you, who cared for you no matter what, then the best thing for you, if you where in trouble, was to be with them, be around them. Even if it just meant sitting on the couch watching TV with your brother. This had been the routine since Jack got well enough to come out of his room, his family surrounded him and acted as they normally would, hoping the familiarity would fix him.

Angel wandered into the room carrying a plate piled precariously high with food, a sandwich, amongst other things.

He dropped down into the arm chair across from the couch and yawned big, groaning with satisfaction as he did.

"That's such bad manners" Bobby rolled his eyes "I'm shocked at you Angel, I'm tryna sing Jack a nice little song and you come in hear with your huge mouth and just sour the whole thing, yell at him Jack" Bobby frowned at Jack as if expecting the kid to just snap into the joke and yell at his brother.

But Jack was just sitting, staring at nothing, mumbling almost silently to himself. Bobby watched him, frowning deeply. "Come on Jack" he stated "Quit playing around and come back to us"

"He aint gonna listen" Angel said around a mouthful of food "He's gone man" he shook his head sadly.

"You talk like that, like you given up?" Bobby asked.

"I haven't given up I'm just being sensible" Angel shot back "We gotta accept the fact that Jackie boy as we know is no more…we just gotta start learning how to look after him, make the house safe so he cant get to knives or any shit like that" Angel said bluntly.

"Don't talk about him like he's not here" Bobby said.

"For all intents and purposes, he's not" Angel remarked.

"He can hear every word we say" Bobby stated.

"He can hear it but he aint processing it" Angel said sadly.

"You don't know that, you don't know a damn thing" Bobby was getting angry, but trying to restrain himself.

"I know our baby brother got all messed up and there's nothing we can do about it, and you sitting here pretending like nothing is wrong isn't going to fix him" Angel stated.

Bobby was still watching Jack, waiting for his brother to react in some way, but Jack was just being Jack, lost in his own world.

"Jack" Bobby stated.

Jack tilted his head to one side, mumbling under his breath again.

"Jack" Bobby repeated.

There was no response.

"Jack!" Bobby actually yelled "Jack look at me damn it"

Jack, who normally would flinch when one of his brothers seriously raised his voice to him, tilted his head back the other way.

"Jack!" Bobby snapped again, leaning over and swatting Jack's leg.

Jack stopped his mumblings briefly and turned his head a half inch toward Bobby.

"I will not take that kind of behaviour" he rasped.

They where the first words he had spoken in over a month.

Bobby shot Angel a glance and resisted the urge to make a very, very big deal out of the fact that Jack has spoken, lest they scare him back into silence. It was something Evelyn had taught them.

"Why not?" Bobby asked casually.

Jack made the incy wincy spider crawl with his hands, bobbing his head from side to side.

"Cos why had a long tail" Jack whispered.

"That's true" Angel had set his plate down, "But what about us Jack? What do you think about us?" he asked softly.

"Always" Jack said almost silently, raising his eyes to the room for the first time.

They where red rimmed and filled with unshed tears and there was a desperation in them, a terrible desperation. Bobby and Angel wordlessly realised that Jack was trying to come back to them, trying to break through what ever wall his mind had hidden him behind.

If they got this wrong, they could lose him again.

"Always like this week or like, for ever?" Bobby asked, not entirely sure what he should say, simply working with what Jack gave him.  
He figured Jack would be aware to some degree of what he was saying, that to Jack, it would have some meaning, some coherent meaning when he thought it. So Bobby and Angel would have to interpret that meaning, use it to give Jack something else to latch onto, to guide him back.

"And beyond" Jack was taking deep breaths, seeming close to panic.

"Buzz Lightyear" Angel smiled as Bobby frowned, not getting the reference "We can watch that later, we got it on video" he said, "Damn good movie" he nodded "To infinity and beyond, you love us that much?"

"Dude that's kinda gay" Bobby smirked.

"Live and learn" Jack said a little louder.

"You saying you learned to be gay from me?" Bobby acted insulted "That's not fair…ry…." Bobby smirked.

"Tinkerbell" Jack muttered.

"Smee" Bobby remembered suddenly the night five years ago when Jack had been similarly traumatised in a hospital, and some how, insulting him had brought him out of it.

"Wendy" Jack gave a fleeting ghost of a smile. He was rocking slightly, shaking.

"Why talking about Peter Pan, just cos you both remember the names from some lame ass book, leaving me all out of it" Angel humphed.

"Not even a Pirate" Jack met Bobby's eyes for a split second, sharing the joke.

"Quit it!" Angel whined "I'm better than a pirate any how, I'm a soldier man, I could kick a pirates ass like a bitch"

"Jackie boy you need to wash your hair" Bobby changed tack, giving Jack a new lead to jump on, hoping he would take it.

"narcissistic nancy boy" Jack shook his head "always its about the image"

"I aint talking shit about looks Cracker Jack, I'm talking about how you smell" Bobby stated.

"There is a certain cheesiness to your scent bro, it's not pleasant" Angel gave a shrug.

"Don't call me that man" Jack gave a sort of weary, all encompassing sigh as if it was not the first time he had made such a request and wouldn't be the last.  
"Quit bein such a cracker then" Bobby shrugged.

Jack looked up at Bobby, meeting his gaze and holding it "Dude you're paler than me" he stated.

It was not a jumbled, nonsensical phrase, an incoherent muttering. It was a flat out statement, a coherent statement.

"Jack?" Angel asked.

"Did you get discharged for being too much of a pussy or are you crying sick to get a vacation?" Jack asked his older brother.

Angel and Bobby moved as one, grabbing their kid brother and wrapping him in hugs. He yelped, shoving them away, holding up his hands as if to remind them he didn't want to be touched and they backed off, watching him carefully.

"You back Jack?" Bobby asked.

Jack scratched his head self consciously, rolling his eyes uncertainly, "I'm just talking man" he mumbled and Bobby and Angel understood that Jack's apparent recovery may not be a permanent fix. It was a step, a leap, in the right direction, but they couldn't rush him.

"You scared us" Angel muttered.

"I scared you? You all shipped me off to the nut house" Jack raised his eyebrows in surprise, but he didn't seem to be totally serious.

"Uh, Jack, you acted nutty" Bobby reminded him, smiling gently.

"I had a reason" Jack said quietly.

"Why'd you do the drugs man?" Angel said sadly "Why'd you do all of it, you could have come to us"

"No I couldn't. Jerry's starting a family. You where in prison Bobby, and Angel you where overseas. I'm not blaming you guys at all but you wheren't around, you have your own lives" Jack shrugged.

"Jack nothing comes before family, not our own shit, if you're in trouble you come to us" Bobby said firmly "And if we're not in a situation to help, if we're not around, Ma is here"

"I didn't want to talk about shit, I didn't want to bring it up, I wanted to forget it" Jack stated "That's why I was getting high" he muttered.

"Why the men?" Bobby asked quietly.

"What the fuck else have I ever done in my life that I'm good enough at to make money?" Jack asked, his voice thick with emotion.

Bobby closed his eyes angrily "Jackie you cant think like that"

"Why not?" Jack whispered "What have I ever done otherwise?" he asked.

"Jack you got your music, you got those drawings…you're talented man, in ways me and this lug here aint…you and Jerry, you're the smart ones in this family, don't sell yourself short…don't be saying you're only good for one thing because it's flat out bullshit" Angel stated.

Jack looked at him "Then why is it the only thing I seem to do?" he was crying now, tears trailing down his cheeks, "Why does it keep happening?"

"Aw kid" Angel threw an arm around Jack's shoulders, pulling him into a hug "You are meant for bigger and better things, I promise you are, it's just…you just have the _worst_ luck of anybody I know" he stated in honestly.

Jack laughed out loud and the sound brought a crash of pots from the kitchen. The boys all jumped and Evelyn appeared in the doorway, staring at Jack.

"Sweetie?" she gasped, pressing her hand to her mouth.

"Ma…" Jack began to cry again, in earnest, heaving sobs wracking his chest "Ma I fucked up, I really fucked up, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry, I'm not mad at you!" he said quickly, "Nothing I did was cos of you, please please don't be mad at me!"

Evelyn walked wordlessly into the room and Bobby and Jack moved away from him. Evelyn sat down beside Jack and stared at him. She took hold of his hands, sliding the sleeves of his long sweater up, showing his scarred wrists.

He tried to pull his arms away but she gripped them. "Why?" she asked, holding his arms so that his wrists where bared to the whole world.

Jack ducked his head, chewing his lip "Ma I don't" he started to say.

"Why Jackie?" she repeated "I need to know why?"

"I…I wanted to get the badness out" he whispered, sounding all of six.

"What does that mean?" Evelyn asked gently.

"All that stuff that happened…it was in my blood like…like a sickness…and I would let it out and…I didn't mean to go so deep that night…but after what that man did, there was so much…badness…I had to go deeper to let it out" he was crying.

"Baby…Oh sweetie" Evelyn could not contain her tears any more.

She pulled Jack's arms forward so that he was wrapped around her, and his head was on her shoulder. As she hugged him, he froze, unsure of what to do. Evelyn squeezed him, holding him as close as she could, hugging him stubbornly even as he seemed to be pulling back away from her.

"There is no badness in you. There is nothing bad in you, there cant be, I have looked in your eyes and I have seen it, you're a good person, you don't need to hurt yourself to make it that way, you where born good" she whispered.

"I made it worse" He said, his voice muffled against her shoulder "Going with those men I made it worse, I made more Bad" his voice was high with emotion.

"No, no, you where confused, you suffered through horrible things and you didn't understand" Evelyn said.

Jack pulled back "I did Ma, I knew what I was doing and I did it anyway" he snapped.

Evelyn stared at him "Well you know what? I don't care. You're my son, and you're damaged but god help me, you all are!" she gave him a smile "Hell you wouldn't even really be a Mercer if you wheren't some kind of fuck up!"

Jack chewed his lip again "Aren't you mad?" he seemed genuinely confused.

"Why would I be mad? What happened to you happened _to_ you, you're a child, a victim of horrible crimes. I cant be mad at you because you haven't done anything!" she snapped.

Jack closed his eyes, seeming suddenly very, very tired. He lay his head on Evelyn's shoulder, not crying, not making a sound, simply being close to his mother.

She hugged him again, feeling him finally relax against her.

Angel and Bobby left the room as Evelyn began rocking back and forth, humming gently to her son, the simple, actions more than enough to comfort, to heal him, more than a life time of therapy ever could.

* * *

"Jack?" a voice called up the narrow stairs and with a groan, Jack Mercer, nineteen years old, staggered to the top of the stair case.

"What?" he asked, wearing only jeans.

His hair was scruffily styled, his body was toned and decorated with tattoo's and scars.

Meredith bit her lip as she took in his physique, not bothering to hide the fact that she appreciated the view.

"You need to help us carry in some bottles from out side" Meredith muttered a little breathlessy "You don't have to worry about putting like…a shirt on or anything…I mean it's snowing outside but…" she shook her head, smiling at his sheepish grin as he turned back into his tiny apartment above the bar, 'McGarvies'

He reappeared wearing sneakers and a t-shirt and walked down the stairs, draping an arm over Meredith's shoulders as they he walked by.

"When are you gonna ask me out for dinner Jack?" she asked him as he pulled a cigarette pack from his pocket and flicked one out of the carton, digging a lighter from another pocket and lighting the cigarette.

"I don't take girls out Mer, you know that, I whore my way around, love em and leave em that's my way" he smiled.

"But you never love me" Meredith, her face a ghostly white, her hair unnaturally black, bit her lip.

"You're special" he told her as they walked through the bar and out into the back alley, "You're like…my best friend ya know? I could never do that to you" he chuckled.

"I wouldn't mind!" Meredith poked his ribs "You're fuckin hot" she stated.

"No Meredith, I respect you too much for that" Jack told her as Roy McGarvie nodded to them.

"Oh _please_" Meredith scoffed.

Roy, Jack and Meredith began to unload the crates of alcoholic beverages and carry them inside the bar, storing them on the floor at first.

Once they had emptied the truck, Roy disappeared into his office leaving Meredith and Jack to unload the crates and put the alcohol away.

"He's far too sneaky for a big old fat guy" Meredith joked "he always manages to get away before he has to do any real work" she sighed.

She took a few of the crates over to the other end of the bar, unloading the beers into the fridge there.

"You heard from Bobby yet?" she called back casually as she moved bottles.

"Not yet, he can be hard to track down if he's outta town ya know? He think's it makes it easier for cops to catch up with him" Jack chuckled.

"What about Angel?" she asked.

"The usual, essentially unreachable for no real reason" he grinned and flashed his tongue piercing to Meredith.

She sighed again and placed her hands on her hips, watching him as he began to lift the heavy crates, his muscles moving in his arms.

He noticed her staring "Mer" he said warningly.

"What I cant even appreciate the aesthetics?" she raised an eye brow.

"Not with _that_ look in your eye you cant" he smirked "Hey you think Roy'll let me and the guys play a set tonight?" he asked.

"I don't see why not, people like what you guys are coming out with" Meredith was still staring at him.

She took a deep breath and walked over, standing directly in front of him " I like you and you like me, you wouldn't 'love me and leave me'…you'd stay with me, I'm sure of it" she said quietly.

He stared down at her "That's sort of egotistical" he told her.

"Cant we just try it?" she asked.

"You don't want to get involved with me Meredith. I'm not just damaged goods, I'm so beyond damaged, I'm junk heap" he shook his head.

Meredith caught his arm and lay one hand over the scars on his wrist "I paint my face white and regularly die my hair black, I spend more time on my make up than most bimbo Hollywood bitches and I flirt with bulimia on a regular basis" she gave him a quirky smile "It's not like you can mess me up even worse" she told him.

Jack pulled her into a hug "But I could" he reminded her.

"We'll never know unless we try" she smirked "look if it goes nowhere I promise I wont get all weird and stop being your friend" she squeezed him.

Jack looked down at her and kissed her fore head gently.

She smiled at him and rose up on tip toe, kissing his lips. He hesitated for a second, then relaxed into the kiss, holding her closer to him.

"Jack, phone call for you!" Roy was yelling up the stairs, sounding pissed "And tell Meredith to get back down here and open up, its past opening and theres people outside!"

Jack grinned at Meredith who blushed and hid under the covers "Whoops" she giggled.

Jack sat up, reaching for his jeans, smiling at Meredith "Maybe we could go out on that date" he said quietly.

Meredith grinned wide and she sat up in the bed and watched Jack dress "Really?" she asked.

"Yeah…I think maybe I would like it" he said, tossing her her t-shirt playfully.

"Well good…I'm gonna go open up" she nodded to herself, "So…yeah…we'll talk later" she was smiling from ear to ear.

Jack leaned down and kissed her again, leaving her to dress a he ran down the stairs to the office. He smiled again as he thought about taking Meredith out, about actually doing something normal for once. He was still smiling as he walked into the office

where Roy stood holding the phone. He gave Jack an odd look as Jack walked in.

"Something up?" Jack frowned.

"You oughta sit down" Roy said somberly, "Take the phone and sit down"

Jack felt fear coil in his stomach and tried to guess what the call could be about. He grabbed the phone from Roy's hand, pressing it to his ear.

"Yeah?" he asked breathlessly.

"Jack?" Jerry's voice was hoarse as if he's been crying.

"What's happened?" Jack all but yelled into the phone.

"Jackie….Jesus, Jack it's Ma, something happened to Ma" Jerry was close to hysteria, Jack could tell.

"What? Jerry, what is it, what the fuck happened?" Jack yelled.

"She was in a store…there was…Oh God, Jack she's dead" Jerry was sobbing "somebody killed her, Ma's dead Jackie"

Jack became aware of the blood pumping through his head as his knees gave way beneath him and he sat down heavily on the floor. "Jerry, no, Jerry that's wrong… you got it wrong" he said calmly.

"No Jackie, she was shot….they fucking shot her….Ma's dead Jack" Jerry told him.

Jack lay the phone down and stood, walking out of the office in a daze of shock.

Meredith saw him and ran over, her smile falling from her face. "Jack what's wrong, what happened?" she asked.

"My mother" Jack said, his voice thick with emotions "My brother is saying she died, but that cant be right…he said she was murdered…I have to go" he blinked and seemed to come back to himself, fixing Meredith with a look "I have to go home, my family's gonna need me, I have to go" he headed for the stair case again.

Meredith followed him, watching him roughly pack a bag "Jack I don't know what to say" she told him "I'm so sorry…is there anything I can do to help?" she asked.

Jack shook his head, close to tears "Um…tell the band for me, tell the guys I'm gonna be home for a while..." he was fighting to keep himself calm "Can you cover my shifts for me until then, um…" he stopped "Shit" he coughed, trying to disguise the fact that he was crying.

Meredith stepped forward and pulled him into a hug, tears in her eyes as he broke down in her arms.

He cried for what seemed like for ever, before seeming to catch himself and straighten up, grabbing for his bag.

"Um…rain check?" he chewed his lip as he looked over at her.

"Sure" Meredith nodded "Just…call us if you need anything you know? Be careful" she knew he was a Mercer, what it could mean that his mother had been murdered.

He stepped back to her and gave her a quick kiss on the lips, running out of the room and down the stairs.

Over two weeks passed before she got a phone call from Jerry Mercer.

"Hey Jerry" she said sweetly, "I'm so sorry for what happened…how's everyone doing, how's Jack?" she asked.

Roy walked into the office and nodded to her as she listened on the phone.

"What?" her sympathetic frown deepened into something closer to confusion and she shook her head "Jerry I don't understand" she stated.

Roy stepped closer to her, as if trying to hear through the phone.

"Oh my god" she breathed "I…I'm so sorry" she was visibly trying to reign herself in from crying as she spoke, but her voice was quavering "What happened to him?" she asked.

Roy was shaking his head as realization dawned, motioning for the phone. "Did you get the people who did it? And who hurt your mom?" she was actually biting her lip as tears stained her cheeks with dark make up.

She closed her eyes and seemed to sway, taking a deep breath "Jerry I'm so sorry…I wish there was something I could say…" she whispered "If there's anything we can do?" she nodded at what ever Jerry said "Alright, well, um…you…you all take care" she put the phone down.

"Mer what is it? Please tell me he's not dead sweetie, there's no way he can be gone" Roy asked her.

"He was shot...in the street outside their house, by the people who killed their mom, they killed Jack too" Meredith pressed her hand to her mouth as she began to sob "Roy he's dead, oh fuck! They killed him" she gasped.

Roy pulled her into a hug, shushing her as she began to cry uncontrollably.

Zack, one of the bar's other staff members leaned into the office, his face a mask of concern as he saw how upset Meredith was.

"Roy? What happened man?" he asked.

"Jack Mercer…he uh…" Roy paused and took a breath to calm himself "Jack Mercer died…he was shot to death"

Zack blew out a breath and shook his head "Fuck" he sighed.

"Go get on the stage, turn up the house lights…we're closing up early tonight" Roy said quietly "If anyone asks you what's happening you tell em…You tell em Jack Mercer died"

* * *

**And that is that, that's the end of Jack Mercer…erm…thank you all, so so much for all your reviews and for everything really, you've been an unbelievable help for me, writing this, it's been difficult cos I've felt SO guilty on Jack but you all have been so sweet and supportive that its made it okay to horribly torture the poor kid, hehehe!**

**No but really, thank you all, I apologise if this last chapter isn't up to scratch but I wanted desperately to post and I couldn't see how I could keep on torturing Jack, time line wise, it just didn't seem feasible. So I hope you enjoy and if not, sorry.**

**Erm, also, because of this story I've been able to make friends with two of the most amazing people on the planet, (you both know who you are) so thanks to people for keeping me writing this story for enabling me to 'meet' these people who are just inspirations.**

**Thanks again all of you, love always.**

**Nadine.xxxxxx**


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